No matter who you are or where you live you may be confronted with having to get over a break up at some point in your life. When you are in love and if you depend on someone else to bring you happiness or a certain stability and peace of mind, transitioning to being single can sometimes be a tough process.
As a love coach and relationship expert I have made it both my life and passion to help individuals just like you quickly bounce back following a break up; to quickly move on or to get back with your ex. Over time our team of love coaches has developed a method and game plan that can help anyone figure out how to get over a break up and find inner peace.
Although every break up is different and all love stories are unique, there are certain similarities or overarching dynamics that are constant in almost every breakup. In this article I will reveal a simple 3 step game plan that you can immediately implement in order to regain your self-confidence and be in a position to re-seduce your ex.
Step 1: To figure out how to get over a break up you must first take a step back
It may seem very simple but the truth is that 90% of the people make the biggest mistakes in the days immediately following a breakup. You are still under the shock of finding out that you have been broken with and you are guided by your emotions. You simply feel as if you can reason with your ex and convince them that they are making a big mistake by leaving you and so you try to convince them otherwise right away or even worse negotiate a way to get back together.
Unfortunately this is the wrong way to go about trying to get back with your ex. Most break ups have been a long time coming or are the results of an action that was so hurtful that they force one party to immediately want to end thing; either way it entails a need for space. Instead of looking to force the issue, try to take a step back in order to analyze your mistakes and come up with a game plan to get them back. If you are improvising or letting your emotions guide you without a clear path your chances of getting back with your ex diminish considerably.
The ultimate purpose of this first step are three folds which will help you understand how to get over a break up: First you must be able to really pin point the root causes of what went wrong in order to put yourself in your ex’s shoes; second you will need to come up with concrete actions to prevent those wrongdoings moving forward and to ensure that you won’t ever repeat the same mistakes with your ex; and third this period away from each other will enable you and your ex to have enough time to get perspective on your past relationships in order to potentially get a fresh start.
Step 2: Now forget about your ex and focus on you
At this point the most common mistakes are that people dwell on the past or they hypothesize about what their ex may be doing or thinking; and both actions lead to inaction on your part. Instead of letting your fear and insecurities get the best of you be strong and take control of your life in order to quickly bring about the necessary changes that will help you quickly get over this break up.
You must set goals for yourself on a daily and weekly basis in order to monitor the progress that you make in the different aspects of your life that matter to you and the one’s that you are looking to improve upon. This will force you to be accountable to yourself and also drastically improve your self-esteem as you will be able to quantify and measure the progress that you have made.
In order to get back with your ex, you need to get back to being the person that you once were when you first attracted and seduced them. You need to let go of the emotional baggage linked to the relationship and focus on you in order to reinvent yourself and prove to your ex that you have changed and that you can make them happy. It all starts with you and with your inner peace or sense of well-being. Your actions and mental state will dictate whether you will have the chance to get back together, not theirs! That’s why it is of the utmost importance that you focus your energy on you and the things that you can control.
Step 3: Realize that you are the prize and re-seduce your ex
Once you have been able to reach step 3 you have already done 90 percent of the work; in essence you have already mastered how to get over a break up; step 3 should be a simple formality. But it is still a very important step and realization in the process of getting back together. You must get in the mind-set that you are the prize and that your ex is just as fortunate to be with you as you would be to be with them. It again sounds simple but most people are unable to value themselves in this way because they forgo step 2 and idealize their ex. If you have been broken up with and think that you are still in love, the odds are that you are putting your ex on a pedestal. By doing so you are giving them way too much power over you.
If you want to re-seduce your ex and become that person that they have always dreamed of being with you it is of the utmost importance that you approach them as equals. You need to be yourself, and spontaneous when you interact with them; not insecure or feel the need to over-think about what they would want to hear. If you were previously together it means that they respected and valued you to an extent, and most importantly that you were able to seduce them. It’s by taking this approach that you will be in a position to complete the process of getting back together; by re-seducing your ex based on your new found confidence and emotional independence rooted in your goal minded approach to your everyday life.
This 3 step process can be put in place by anyone with self-discipline who has a deep desire to get their lives back on track in order to get back with their ex. At the start of this article I started off by acknowledging that every break up is different; that’s why we offer a one on one coaching service either by phone, email or in person. If you feel that you need additional help or a step by step coaching in order to tailor a game plan to your story, don’t hesitate to reach out. It will be my pleasure to help you meet your objectives and ensure that you get back with the one you love!
Your coach to understand how to get over a break up in 3 simple steps,