To change for an ex: A good or bad idea?

To change for an ex is not always a good ideaFollowing a breakup some people would be willing to do anything to get back with the one they love. But if you’re familiar with my articles on getting back together with an ex, you’ll know that changing who you are for your ex isn’t the way to go about it; please realize that being willing to do anything without a clear plan of action, just to make your ex happy seldom produces positive results.

What you truly need is a well organized strategy that is clear from the very beginning in order to determine which techniques will help you get another chance with the one you love. It’s not by buying them expensive gifts, or by begging them to take you back, or by refusing to talk to them for months that you’re going to be successful in this endeavor.

No matter what the cause of your breakup is, no matter what your story is, there is one element that is almost always present: Lack of perspective. That is one of the primary reasons why some people will try to change for an ex without a clear plan. Your ex doesn’t see a future with you because of their unhappiness in the relationship, or because of something you maybe did in the past that hurt them. You’ve told them a million times that you’re going to change, but nothing has changed quite yet… So how do you fix this? It’s by showing them that they were wrong to leave that you will find new initiatives in your attempt at getting back together. You will therefore have to change for your ex, but in the right way.

Does this mean that you will have to reduce yourself, or to set aside your wants and needs? These are the most common questions, and I will answer them here!

Change that can seduce your ex

After a breakup, there is nothing worse than wanting to reestablish the relationship in which you used to be. Let me explain.

If your ex decided to leave you, or if you decided to put an end to your relationship and you now regret it, the fact remains the same: there were recurring problems in your couple.

I know this will be surprising to hear, but you’re going to have to forget about your previous relationship if you want to find yourself back in the arms of the one you love. You’ll have to write a new love story with them, because your last one wasn’t working. You’re onto a new chapter now, and you have to know how to demolish the old before rebuilding something new and solid. It’s not your previous relationship that needs to come back. A newer, better version needs to come to life, filled with happiness; A new relationship in which you both want to stay together. So prepare to be in a brand new relationship with your ex partner!

As I’m sure you’ve understood in order to get to this point some changes will have to be made. You will have to prove to your ex that you’ve evolved, that you’ve grown, and that is exactly why you’ll be able to find happiness together again.

Take a moment to put yourself in their shoes. It would be hard to take back someone who you’ve just broken up with a few days or weeks before, especially if this person has made zero improvements. Why would you jump back into the same unhappiness and disappointments you were experiencing before? And your ex is totally right in thinking this way! So, show them that this time, it will be different…it will be better! To change for an ex is nothing to be ashamed of. It proves how much you care, and shows your maturity.

In fact you don’t have to put yourself in your ex’s shoes to understand! It’s enough to take a moment to think about it to realize that you don’t want to fall back into the same broken relationship without making it evolve and blossom!

How to change for an ex: Tips to succeed quickly

It’s not enough to just think about changing; you have to take action and do what is best as quickly as possible in order to increase your chances of success. Changing for an ex requires certain steps that you have to adhere too if you really want a positive, visible change that will bear fruits.

Firstly, you have to know what things need to change, and which ones are the most important. In order to do this, you will have to understand the breakup. In our eBook, which has helped hundreds of people in similar situations to this one, you can learn a specific method for analyzing what needs to change. By understanding why the breakup occurred, you will be fully able to comprehend and foresee your ex’s expectations and needs.

The change shouldn’t be theoretical; you have to really put it into practice. This is why errors committed in the past like jealousy, insults, lack of attention, or anything that could lead to breaking up should in fact be left to the past! Of course we all have flaws, but you have to make an effort to work on them, minimize them, and to keep them from weighing down on your relationship.

An evolution can also be physical. If you’ve already had the chance to partake in a private consultation via phone or email, you’ll know that I highly suggest to exercise as a way to feel better mentally, and to bring about a physical improvement that increases your self confidence. Physical change is easy to see, and you will be able to show to your ex how much you’ve improved.

Never put yourself down for an ex!

For some people trying to change for an ex is not a good idea because they associate it with being untrue to themselves. I will never ask you to go against your will, or to do anything that doesn’t feel right. A relationship requires sacrifices and certain adjustments and compromises, but it’s important that you remain happy. You shouldn’t feel forced to do anything that simply doesn’t feel right to you. If you do things against your will, you risk ending up regretting your decisions or even losing your sense of self completely.

Your couple will not evolve if both of you are not stable and happy. Furthermore you should never put your ex on a pedestal, even if they are your soul mate. You have to look at your relationship in the bigger picture. If you just agree to everything, it won’t be long before you realize that you can’t go on like that. Your relationship won’t evolve either, and you will risk feeling stagnant.

Therefore efforts have to be sustained, especially when you’re beginning your attempt at getting back together with your ex. While doing so, be very careful not to belittle yourself or risk losing your identity. In my opinion, love isn’t a pretext for getting walked all over.

Your coach to learn how to change for an ex in the right way!

Sincerely,

Adrian