One of the questions that keeps coming up when I coach people via phone is centered on social media. Facebook in particular seems to be a problem for a lot of you because in a way you are forced to re-live the breakup a second time.
Adrian my ex blocked me on social media, what should I do or how should I react? As a coach and relationship expert who specializes in helping people get back with their ex, I hear this question at least once every other day. People have a tendency of being very unsettled when an ex tries to distance themselves on social media; you too may have no idea what to do or how to react.
After all we are never taught while growing up how to cope with rejection in love, or how to heal from a broken heart. This is why I have made it my mission to help those that need support after a breakup and to provide individuals with tools and techniques to get back with the one they love.
In this article I would like to address this issue centered around social media and give you my expert feedback in order for you to know exactly what to do or how you should act if your ex is looking to distance themselves from you and your previous relationship on Facebook, Instagram or any other social media platforms!
Your ex is blocking you because he is seeking space
Social media has taken a life of its own and many people experience a relationship with their significant other just as much via certain online platforms as they do in the real world. You profess your love to the one you deeply care for through status updates, through pictures to immortalize certain moments or showcase what your relationship is all about to your friends.
After a breakup your ex is trying to prove to you and to others that you are no longer together. In order to do that he will go out of his way to make sure that he disassociates himself from you and your previous relationship as a way to get over a painful breakup.
It simply is a way for him or her to declare their independence to you and reiterate that they are now single for real. Perhaps in a way he is also trying to convince himself that he has moved on.
If your ex decides not to speak to you anymore following a breakup, or not to answer your calls or messages, or to stop sharing what he is doing with you, why should you be surprised! It’s normal in a way because you are now broken up.
You no longer share that same intimacy and you are honestly better off not having access to his social media page or activity anyways; trust me it can be a blessing whether you are trying to move on or even if you want to get back together!
My ex changed their profile picture AND blocked me on Facebook!
They say that a picture says a thousand words, so what about removing a picture! Why did he do it and does it mean that my ex has moved on?
I fully understand the significance or power that a profile picture can have, and I also get why you would be even more hurt once your ex decides to change their profile picture from your couple to just themselves.
Again it forces you to relive and acknowledge a present without them; your fears insecurities kick in another notch and you also project your ex on their own or even worse with someone else.
But understand this for what it really is: Your mind playing tricks on you, your fears paralyzing you to the point that you are simply imagining the worse possible outcome imaginable based on how you feel this specific minute.
Take a second to gain a bit of perspective and realize that your ex just changed a photo, and blocked you because you were just too needy. This is not an end in itself. This situation is fluid and will evolve based on your actions, how you react to this adversity and how you choose to bounce back.
He or she could very well unblock you as quickly as they blocked you! So take a deep breath, don’t panic and let’s work together on turning this thing around shall we?
He blocked me because he doesn’t love me anymore?
I felt that it was very important to clarify this point; the act of blocking you doesn’t mean that your ex no longer has feelings, it simply means that he or she needs space!
Despite what people may think you don’t just stop loving someone, you can get frustrated or annoyed, be dissatisfied with how things evolve but it doesn’t me that you stop caring for them.
As an expert who helps exes reconnect and figure out how to be in healthy and balanced relationships, what scares me most is not an ex’s anger or frustration because we can quickly shit those negatives emotions with targeted actions and techniques.
What I worry about is indifference, when once can no longer draw any reaction at all from an ex all together.
I talk about this concept and many more in my self help programs to win back the heart of the one you love.
Don’t panic when thinking he blocked me, your ex may be frustrated now and may tell you mean things like that he doesn’t love you anymore; but I know that most times how he feels will quickly evolve in your favor if you do the rights things!
What should you do when your ex blocks you on everything!
I have come across some extreme situations when an ex decides to completely cut all possible communication platforms; so what should you do when your ex blocks on you on everything? What does it mean and how should you react?
Based on my experience this usually means that you’ve made HUGE mistakes. You really hurt your ex or that you were extremely needy and even perhaps that you harassed him or her!
If you are blocked everywhere I would highly recommend that you read our eBook 70 Pro Tips To Get Back With Your Ex, because you’ll need extra support! It is a book that my partner Alex and I have written following more than 10 000 hours of one on one coaching sessions helping people rekindle.
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This eBook that is downloadable right away is a compilation of our best and most powerful techniques. It will definitely help stir you in the right direction if you’ve been blocked everywhere you turn!
Recognize that every situation is unique and either way you will need to look in the mirror and be honest with yourself to figure out what led you to get blocked on everything!
I’ve heard some people tell me my ex blocked my number because I cheated, and some others say my ex blocked me from his phone after I called 17 times last night.
Ultimately when someone who at one point was in love decides to go to extreme ends like these to ensure that you cannot reach them, it usually means that he or she is badly hurt.
Remember that you are not the only suffering after all!
You’ve caused your ex great pain too and it is best to lay low for a while and to let time heal some of the wounds for both parties.
No matter what taking a step back can’t hurt at this point because you clearly went too far in one way or another!
How to make your ex unblock you quickly?
Despite everything that I have told you here on winning back the one you love by controlling your emotions, going through a process of personal development and evolving in a positive manner; I want to also give you tips to help you figure out how to make your ex unblock you quickly!
First of all you have to understand that your ex will probably still be checking your profile or social activity, even if they blocked you! So don’t block them back out of anger because you can leverage your social media account to make your ex unblock you quicker.
The idea is to showcase your change and all the fun things that you are doing; don’t go over the top either, but showing him or her that you are not going to wait for them forever or that you won’t let yourself feel be depressed can be an amazing way to trigger a positive reaction.
Do hesitate to do things that you always dreamed of doing; again stretch your comfort zone and be social. Then make sure you relay this on your social platforms while branding yourself in exactly the way that you are trying to evolve into!
Don’t hesitate to change your look or hairstyle and buy a few new pieces that make you feel good and look good too.
Lastly, change your profile photo to a high quality high resolution image of you smiling, being happy or doing something that shows that you are now at peace with yourself and simply happy. If possible go do a photo shoot with a friend who has a good camera or with a professional photographer!
Even if you decided to block him out of spite he will see your profile picture sooner or later and at least see the new and improved you.
If you are able to stop chasing your ex and really start to implement my advice you will be unblocked way sooner than you think!
Your ex will be curious; at the very least, they will be intrigued and want to know how you were able to bounce back so quickly…and they will unblock you to find out!
What if she blocked me because she is dating someone else?
I have encountered some cases where an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend was blocked because their partner had a new relationship.
Most people find this excruciating and they are very surprised when I tell them that being blocked is actually a positive sign!
How can that be?
Simple really; if your ex took the time to block you on social media, it’s probably because their new boyfriend or girlfriend requested it, or made a comment because they were bothered by the fact that you are still somewhat connected or perhaps in touch.
Capitalize on this fear, and become a real threat or an issue for their new relationship! How? By doing exactly what I’ve been preaching throughout this entire article!
Be happy, do cool things, become that person that your ex always wanted to be with…and let the world know. Your ex’s rebound will become insecure and push them right back into your arms.
I’ve seen this happen time and time again; I’ve just recently helped a man named Darrin get back with his ex girlfriend by using this very technique – and it has worked for countless others!
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So even if your ex blocked you because they are dating someone else, don’t sweat it. Just focus on you and your own personal growth and good things will soon happen!
My ex blocked me on social media and I don’t care!
My goal is for you to reach a state where you can say my ex blocked me on social media and I don’t care!
Once you are able to say those words and mean them you will be one step closer to getting back together. It may sound counter-intuitive at first but when you take the time to dig a little deeper and really analyze the process that would lead you to utter those very words it will all make sense.
Your ex blocked you because he needs space. As we’ve seen previously, if your ex feels this way it’s probably because you have made tons of mistakes and put him on a pedestal.
Odds are that you are constantly in demand of his time, attention or love; you need him more than he needs you. As long as you are in this dynamic, how can you realistically expect to seduce your ex? How can you expect him or her to want to get back together if you are no longer a challenge?
Relationships are about finding the right balance of power between two people in order for everyone to feel valued and inspired by their partner. After a breakup that balance of power usually shifts completely in favor of the one who decides to ends things.
The one being broken up can sometimes beg, plea or chase the ex to no avail only tilting the balance of power even more and thus pushing the man or woman they love even further and further away.
If you don’t have help, guidance or support this dynamic can become unbearable. It’s normal for you to be offended or betrayed if your ex keeps rejecting you or expressing his need for space after a breakup.
But you need to be strong and find a way to control your fears and negative emotions in order to give him what he wants! Stop reaching out to him and focus on the things that you can control; you, your actions and your attitude.
Again you need to find the strength to take the first step in order to be active and to go back to doing things that make you happy and seek to live with purpose. Finding a cause or a reason to wake up in the morning other than your ex should be your focus.
Once you are able to do so, you will be in a more positive mindset. You will soon realize that you are more secure or at peace. Before know it your ex will come running back to you, begging for another chance!
You truly have the power to make that happen, but you must find the inner strength to control your emotions and to always keep reminding yourself that it starts and ends with you and what you do; Not what your ex may or may be posting or doing on social media.
How to prove that you’ve changed if you are no longer talking to your ex
Another question that constantly comes up is the notion of proving that you have changed to an ex if you are no longer seeing each other or if he has blocked you on social media. People ask me all the time “but Adrian how can I prove that I’ve changed if we are no longer speaking to each other?”
It’s a good question. But the truth is that if you are asking yourself this question you haven’t changed yet! If you had truly evolved that question would never have crossed your mind because you would be living that change every day. You would know in your heart that you are no longer the same person and your attitude would also reflect that change.
Even if you haven’t spoken to your ex in weeks you can still prove your change to him or her. For example if you were super needy and in need of their constant attention your ex has probably developed a certain sense of security from the comfort of knowing that you are chasing him or her around.
That kind of attention can become addictive on a subconscious level!
By not reaching out, and through inaction towards your ex, you are in fact doing a strong action; by not looking to contact him or her and instead focusing on you, you are proving to your ex that you have evolved and that you are no longer in a state of emotional dependency.
You can now control your emotions and you will now place yourself in position to become attractive again to your ex; to become a challenge!
So if your ex has blocked you on Facebook don’t panic, it’s quite normal or common actually!
Take a step back and focus on you to once again become that man or woman that inspired and seduced him at the beginning of your relationship.
If you are looking for more tools and tips to be in the best possible position to make your ex really want to be with you, than don’t hesitate to reach out to me so that we can work together!
Like so many others before you, I will take the time to listen to your story, to answer all of your questions, to provide you with feedback on why the relationship truly fell apart; but most importantly I will give you a game plan tailored to your specific needs and what you are going through right now!
If you are serious about doing everything possible to get back together or if you just want to discover powerful tools and techniques that you can implement right away with your ex than don’t wait any longer and book coaching session today so that we can work together!
I also encourage my readers to share their story in the comments section of all my articles. Feel free to tell me what you are having a hard time with, or to ask me a question in regards to something that you’ve read here.
It is my commitment to my readers to always answer every single comment that I receive no matter how long it takes. It is both my passion and hobby to invest myself in the lives of individuals who are looking for answers and to fight for love!
That is why I wholeheartedly wish you all the very best in your quest to be with the one you love. I hope that you will find the motivation to take the necessary steps to become who you want to be.
In turn you will become better partners and experience healthy fulfilling relationships with the person that you love so dearly.
The coach to call if you want to get back with someone you love or when your ex has blocked you on social media,
Sincerely,
Adrian
Life Coach, Motivational Speaker & Relationship Expert
Co-Founder of WithMyExAgain.com
470 Responses
My boyfriend broke up with me about 3 months ago after a 2 year relationship. He was very angry at me and blocked me from all social media. We see each other everyday at school. At first I tried to fix things and I would stare at him to see where he was or who he was talking to. Then I just started to ignore him. He would cut into conversations I had with others. I then completely ignored him. I stopped looking at him or wondering where he was. If I talked to other guys he would get jealous and try to get my attention. I still ignored him. We went in Christmas holidays and we have had NC for almost 30 days. He still has me blocked. He told a mutual friend of mine that it’s too late for us because he heard that I am happy and have moved on. He also said his parents were a huge influence on him to not get back together. My friend told him to not give up. So I am not sure where to go from here?
Hello Nina,
It would be my pleasure to answer your comment and questions but first I would like to know what was the reason that your boyfriend gave you for breaking up? and also how old you are since you mention being in school and his parents involvement in the relationship? Thanks for your clarification as I can only answer comments for people over the age of 21. I wish you all the best in your quest to get back with the one you love. Best,
Adrian
Hi I really need your help because I want to be okay with the breakup but all I can do is be sad and thinks about him!! My boyfriend randomly broke up with me one day and said it was because he lost feelings for me, but he showed no sign of it. He started telling other people he missed me, then other people that he wanted nothing to do with me! I try to not see him as much as possible. It’s been about a month since our breakup and he’s texted me once or twice just trying to say hi and I responded, which I think was a mistake because i shouldn’t respond to him right away I feel. But today he blocked me on Instagram and Twitter randomly and I don’t know why. Aim trying to give him space but it’s heart breaking. Please help me!!!
Hello Cassie,
Thank you for sharing your story. I understand you frustration because helping people like you is what I do everyday! I want you to find comfort in knowing that the only reason why your ex boyfriend blocked you on social media is to prevent himself from constantly checking your pictures and updates; I interpret it as a sign that he misses you and that he cannot control his urge to see what you are up too!
Don’t stress or panic, focus on doing activities that you truly enjoy doing and start to engage in projects that are dear to you. Force yourself to go out and engage in social settings in order to rebuild a social life for yourself…continue to post as you normally would on Twitter and Instagram and don’t hesitate to showcase all the fun things that you are up too and show to the world that you are moving forward with your life.
Don’t be fooled, even if you are blocked your ex won’t be able to resist the urge to check your page out (perhaps through a friend’s account or a fake account)! In time he will come back begging for a second chance….men most often do if you don’t chase them!
Best of luck in your quest to bounce back and to reclaim your ex boyfriend! If you want even more support and guidance, don’t hesitate to reach out to me for a private one on one coaching session so that I can help you every step of the way and to ensure you meet your goals.
Sincerely,
Adrian
thank you so much you just made me feel so much better! But I have one last question, yesterday my ex boyfriend texted me saying some very mean things to me because he was mad that I hung out with his friends and he feels I am stealing them away from him. I said some hurtful things back which probably wasn’t a good idea but now I feel like crap and can’t stop thinking about it. I think I’m just going to leave it alone for now and let time heal some of the tension. What do you think I should do?
Hi Adrian, sorry to post again but I posted the one below this and since then something happened. My ex boyfriend texted me very angry saying some really hurtful things because he is mad that I was hanging out with his friends. I wasn’t trying to hurt him or make him jealous but clearly I did because he texted me to tell me “he’s not jealous”, we both said some mean things to each other over text and now I cannot stop thinking about it and feel like crap. I have a pit in my stomach. Does he hate me now?
Hey Cassie,
I don’t think that he hates you, and the fact that he is showing so much emotion can actually be a good thing! The best would really be for us to speak over the phone in order for me to advise you appropriately; I assure you that a coaching session with me will really help you feel a lot better and a lot more confident moving forward!!
I look forward to hear from you.
Sincerely,
Adrian
What number do I call to talk on the phone?
How do I get in touch with you?
You can book a coaching session direcly via the following link:
https://www.withmyexagain.com/shop/express-premium-phone-package/?add-to-cart=554
Or send me your contact info via the following link:
https://www.withmyexagain.com/contact/
Looking forward to our coaching session!
Sincerely,
Adrian
My ex boyfriend and i started arguing alot towards the end of our relationship. We were together for 2 years, he asked for space and when he came around i found out he was talking to another girl, who he claims to be “just a friend ” but he hid her name in his phone. He dumped me soon after, then later came back saying he wanted to “try” with me and that he doesn’t want to regret it, he later said we don’t work and that we would never get back together, I tried repeatedly to fix our relationship but the more I tried the more he became mean and cold towards me, he claims he doesn’t want a relationship, he’s not leaving a relationship to get into another, that he wants to do whatever he wants and be able to be selfish, it’s heartbreaking but after NYE we had a huge fight 1 day later he texted me saying he apologized and that I deserve someone better and that he hopes I find that person thats better. It’s been 11 days since I’ve Seen or spoken to him. In these 11 days I’ve pushed myself to do whatever I can to fulfill my days, I go out on social gatherings, I get all dolled up, and I started taking a pole dancing class to excercise. He did block me on instagram, however my instagram is not private so he can view my profile if he wanted to, which I’m sure he does, so I started posting sexiest photos and also showing I’m having a great time. I do miss him though, part of me wants him to come back, but I’m tired of chasing him.
Hey D,
I would like to congratulate you for what you have already been able to accomplish! I know that things are tough at the moment, that you miss him and that you are unsure of what your emotional future holds; but I can tell you that based on my experience things will turn out just fine for you if you continue what you have been doing! Focus on you and your overall well being and don’t reach out to him. After a few more weeks, I assure you that your ex will come running back once he realizes what he’s lost. You are the prize and you will have the final say in this love story!
Keep up the good work and don’t hesitate to reach out for support.
Best,
Adrian
Hi, I need some advice, My boyfriend an I were dating for 7 months and things seemed to be going really well. He was constantly pursuing me – calling, texting, wanting to see me and saying I love you (which he initiated after being together 4 months). One night we went to dinner with my best friend and her husband and we all had a great time and made plans to get together again in a few weeks. 3 days later my boyfriend sends me an email telling me that someone “has reappeared” into his life that he never expected to see again and he realized he had feelings for her. Her went on to say that he needs to take a step back to sort out his feelings before continuing any sort of relationship. I was completely blindsided. I tried to call him to talk about it, but he put me right into VM – so I left a nice message stating that I wasn’t mad, but I wished he told me in person instead of waking up to an email. I took it as a break up and replied a week later that I respected his decision and appreciated the time we spent together and then went NC. I broke it once to wish him a Merry Christmas and then started NC again. It’s been 4 weeks (it’s been 7 weeks since the initial email) I saw that today he not only unfriended me on facebook, but blocked me! I have not contacted him, so I’m wondering why he would do that and if I should say something to him about it (we were friends yesterday -so I know it happened today). I know it’s for the best, but I feel like it’s a double slap in the face – first he broke up with me and now he is basically erasing our whole history together as if he never even knew me! I was trying to be mature about everything – that’s why I didn’t delete him – I just unfollowed him so I didn’t see him in my News Feed. Why would he delete me almost 2 months later out of the blue?
Hey Jennifer,
Thank you for sharing your story. I understand why you would be offended by his action at the time of the breakup; Men who act in that way usually have something to hide. You shouldn’t feel upset by the fact that he unfriended you on FB because he frankly doesn’t deserve you. I know it based on the way that you were able to control your emotions and how you were able to react with such class when he took the easy way out! But to answer your question, unfriending you had everything to do with him having trouble to deal with his insecurities and not being able to deal with what he did to you. It could also very well be a way for him to force himself to stop stalking you! Based on my experience I can tell you that he will most probably come back around; don’t fall for it, again you deserve better! Best of luck moving forward and don’t hesitate to reach out and book a coaching session with me if you are seeking more in depth answers to your questions.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Thanks so much for your response! I just think it’s a bit extreme to “block” someone. I can see unfollowing or posssibly even unfriending to help move on (both of our profiles are private – so if you unfriend you wouldn’t be able to see anything present)- if you left with no hard feelings (which I thought we did – which of course wasn’t easy knowing he left me to pursue someone else even though he claimed he loved me and was so happy we found each other) but blocking me makes me feel like I did something wrong when I haven’t even tried to contact him (and was trying to respect his decision)- plus I was trying to leave things on good terms – good endings help make good beginnings with the next person. I definitely would not go back if he came back around (I don’t want to be anyone’s second choice or back-up plan) but someone told me he may have blocked me because he’s confused and still has feelings for me – could that be true? I don’t think so but I would love your opinion. Thanks!
or is he possibly looking for a reaction from me? Or has he just moved on?
Hi i need help please, so i was dating this girl for 3 years, she broke up with me and 4 months later she had a new boyfriend. Then a couple months later she was kicked out of her house and moved in with her new boyfriend, they have been together for 4 months now and its been 9 months since we broke up. I truly believe she is my soulmate and i havent stopped thinking about her ever since. Also she had me blocked on almost everything except she unblocked me on instagram. We also havent talked in months. I just want her back, what do i do??
Hey Nick,
You are truly facing a completed situation and I would need to know a bit more about how things ended and the nature of your relationship while you were together. The best would be for us to speak over the phone during a one on one coaching session in order for me to fully understand the scope of what you are going through and to answer all of your questions. I would also provide you with a game plan to win her back!
I sincerely hope to hear from you soon.
All the very best,
Adrian
Thank you, during the 3 years we dated we did everything together, we seen each other almost everyday even if it wasnt for that long. I did everything for her also. It ended after an argument because she was brainwashed from her step dad saying i wasnt making enough money to support her, and when i said i was going to kill myself if she left me, her step dad told her that that was abusive. But she knew i would never do that. Like a month ago she reached out to me and said that she knows she was brainwashed and she hates her stepdad and thats why she moved out of there. The conversation was over text and went smooth but thats the only time ive talked to her
Hey Nick, you should never ever use those types of fear tactics to get back with an ex; it’s quite dangerous and it never has any positive lasting effects! I urge you to book a coaching session with me in order for me to help you with a few personal development tools. I believe that the key to getting her back starts by working on your overall well being and mental state.
All the best,
Adrian
Hi, recently I’ve became more confused than ever regarding my ex. So we broke up a few months ago, she had a lot going on and I let it get the best of me. We kept in touch over the following month because I wanted to help. She then said that knowing that I wanted her back she didn’t think it was fair on me to be in this situation because she wasn’t in a place to get back together. We decided to give each other some space, this lasted a few days until she said she was crying one night because she missed me. However a few days later I found myself blocked on her phone. A week later she unblocked me and we chatted that night. The next day she thought it was a bad idea and she blocked me again. I had told her I’d give her some space for the next week or so due to her stress in work. I messaged on Facebook the next week and got no response. I went a bit crazy by messaging her a few more times on Facebook then I became blocked on it too. I haven’t heard from her since and its nearly a week. Am I crazy to think she still has feelings for me in some way? Maybe that her blocking me is just her way of guaranteeing the space that she wanted? Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks
Hey Tom,
Your ex may still have feelings for you but what I see is that her insecurities and fear of losing you are preventing her from moving on; you can definitely play on those insecurities to make her regret her decision. So the last thing that you should do is chase her…tell her you love her, etc. Go no contact for 3 weeks and let her think that you are moving on! It would be beneficial for you to book a coaching session in order for me to answer all of your questions and doubts; and to provide you with a more in depth plan to win her back.
I hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck,
Adrian
Thanks for the advice. I actually tried leaving a voicemail earlier today. I don’t know whether they still get them if I’m blocked but basically apologised for the crazy messaging on Facebook. Didn’t chase or beg for a response, just wanted to apologise for that. Was that a bad idea? I’m going straight back into no contact and hopefully she’ll reach out at some point. I still believe that some part of her has feelings for me, it may just take this time to let the stress subside and her true feelings come out. I’d like to think that in that 3 weeks I’ll have my answer one way or the other. I can’t really reach out any way without going to her house which I don’t want to do. The balls basically in her court now, which is scary
Hey Tom,
Thanks for sharing your story. Your ex is clearly still doubting the decision to breakup; I can confidently say this based on all the back forth. But you are being way too forth coming and that is actually pushing her away. You should go no contact for at least 3 weeks in order to play on her insecurities and to shift the tables in your favor. This is obviously only the tip of the iceberg and we would need to speak over the phone or via email in order for me to fully grasp the dynamics and to provide you with more insights and a tailored game plan. But I wanted you to know that it is probably still possible to win her back if you are able to keep your emotions in check and give her the time and space to start chasing you!
Best of luck,
Adrian
Hello Adrian, could you give me advice by email..?
Hey Katherine,
It would be my pleasure to work with you via email, to answer all of your questions and provide you with a game plan. You can book a session with me via the following link: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Looking forward to it,
Adrian
Hi. Thanks for the great article, kind of helps calm me down about the whole situation. My ex blocked me on Facebook and her phone after blowing hot and cold with me for a month or so. She apologised for this but said the reason was that she was really stressed and didn’t want me adding to it as our relationship had been a bit chaotic since the breakup.
Anyway my friend told me today that she posted a picture on her page basically signifying breaking free from something. Obviously my mind began to worry thinking this was about me and her moving on. My first instinct is try and find some way of contacting her but I’ve managed to curb that and continue with the enforced no contact I find myself in. On the other hand her posting this could mean she’s still thinking about me and trying to put a brave face on things. Or it could have nothing to do with me at all and I’m just overthinking things. Have you any experience with things like this? What should I be thinking?
Hey Paul,
Thanks for reaching out. I seen this type of communication via social media all the time. Most likely she is simply trying to convince herself that she is moving on more than anything else. Stick to your no contact and let her own insecurities bring her back towards you.
Don’t be fooled she is most probably still checking out your social media pages from a friend’s profile or through other means. So don’t hesitate to post picture and show the world that you are also being social, moving on and positive in general.
I would obviously need to know a lot more about your relationship, but from what I gather, time will play in your favor.
Best of luck in your quest to get back with the one you love and don’t hesitate to reach out if you need tailored feedback.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi, Adrian. Interesting read. This is something I’m going through right now. A guy I like blocked me on FB because I was too pushy. I got emotional and told him that I liked and missed him even though he said he wasn’t interested in a relationship. I don’t think he’s seeing anyone else, but I know he’s stressed with his work and studies. I know he doesn’t like to feel smothered and I acted needy. Do you think he might unblock me in the future? I just want to be friends again.
Hey!
Thanks for reaching out! Yes, the odds are that he will actually unblock you on his own…many times people block others in the spur of the moment or when they are frustrated but when the tension eases and with a bit of perspective I think that he will come around…especially if you just want to be friends. Give him time and don’t reach out for the next 3 weeks and let’s see what happens. If he hasn’t unblocked you then, I encourage you to touch base with me or to post another comment in order for us to look at potential ways to re-engage at that time.
Best of luck,
Adrian
Hey again! It’s been three weeks and I’m still blocked. I haven’t contacted him and I’m afraid to do it. I know his best friend, but he doesn’t want to get involved in this.
I don’t think he’s seeing someone else, he prefers being single. I remember he said that if I had been more relaxed about the situation (him living for a few months in my city) we could have met. I was so excited that we were going to live in the same city that I got needy and pushy with my texts. He said that my behaviour was unattractive. If I had accepted the reality instead of pushing him we’d still be friends. Any chance for me? Thank you for your inspiring articles.
Hi Adrian,
My ex and I dated for two years and our anniversary is coming up in a couple days. Four days ago he broke up with me after a fight and blocked me off all social networking. Our relationship has been rocky for a very long time and we both have been unhappy, and understood that we had issues we needed to address. We were the kind of people that were madly in love with each other, but just couldn’t handle a lot of stuff. Anyways so when he dumped me, he sent me this email and immediately blocked me off all social media so that I could not respond. We have broken up before, but it was never for long. I have spent the last couple days thinking on it, and it is not an incompatibility issue but rather something that I have been doing wrong and am now aware of. I don’t wish for this to be forever, especially if it was for the wrong reasons. I understand what a clean break is, but is blocking my family and deleting my friends necessary?
This was the email: “We both have been investing a lot of thought into our relationship; the deficiencies, the history and the future. I want to thank you for the lessons and values that you have shared with me and I feel like we both have grown as people. However, I am not happy with the individual I have become in this relationship. Therefore, I would like us to take this opportunity for a clean break. Time will provide closure and this is for the best. This decision was not easy to make but it is the right one. I don’t think I will ever date a woman as beautiful or intelligent as you and I do still love you, but this relationship is not good for either of us. You are amazing and I only wish you the best for the rest of your life. Best wishes forever.” Is he just angry/disappointed with me. Do I stand any chance of getting him back?
Riri
Hey Riri,
Thanks for reaching out!
I would need to know a bit more about you and your previous relationship in order to advise you properly. For example, how old are you both? How many times have you broken up previously? and was it always him breaking up with you?
Either way I doubt that this will be the last time that you hear from him!
The fact that he sent you this note and immediately blocked you on social media shows a bit of immaturity and also highlights that he was acting on impulse more than anything else. Do not contact him on your anniversary, and let him make the first step to make things right in the future otherwise you will be forever chasing him… even if you do end up getting back together.
I wish you the best of luck in your quest to be with the man you love.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi Adrian,
Thank you for the prompt reply! Well I’m 23 and he’s 25. We’ve had one serious break up previously, about a year ago – lasted about 5 – 6 weeks. He has always been a great boyfriend and treated me well, something I had taken for advantage. I guess I’m a little immature and we broke up because I tend to get insecure and then have a need to control things. Even though it is completely irrational. And when I get insecure I have problems with trust – very unwarranted. My point is that he is probably tired of drama and me fighting with him all the time. He accused me of being manipulative because I get insecure and on the whole probably thinks i’m crazy. But he really does love me and has gone to the ends of this world for me. He is a very serious guy, very introverted, intelligent and pensive. So he really thinks about things. And yes he is always breaking up with me because i’m the problem.
He does not jump into relationships easily and will only date someone if they tick ALL his boxes. As such, he has had only two relationships (including me – both long term). We lived together for almost two years and spent almost all our time together so there is a strong bond. Also he is a long term thinker, so tries to strategise things for the both of us, i.e. jobs, marriage, kids etc.
I did try calling him a couple times upon receiving the mail but he rejected the calls. I did send him a follow up email immediately stating that I wish to handle this over a call/ in person as I deserve that respect after two years. He has not responded to it. Since then I have made no attempt to contact him, and I would say it has been 3 days of No Contact.
riri im also liked that , 2years and 3 moths valentines day is our nniversary she prefered to dump me because she wanted to do whatever she wanted . And she blocked me and i dont know what to do
Hello i was wondering if you can help me .I just got seperated with my ex and our relationship lasted 2years and3 months . We have broken before. The thing is she started to do things i get mad and just flirt with guys and blcked me from Direct Messaging while we were in the relationship . Then i told her its she respecting me or dumping me and she dumped me . She added those guys on isntagram and talks to them regurarly . I see her 2 times a week (college clases) then the first time i acted casual and being polite. And when i didnt gaev her much imortance she got mad ans just continue watching me . Lateer that day she blockedme from everything started to talk to guys she has hooked up before. I want her back . I had issues with the time she gave me . She works and im ok but she prefers to talk to them and just be alone rather than talking to me . Problems started from alot before . She blocked me but her sister still follows me in instagram . dont understand if she dumped me and told me that whats her problem . Also i had a weakness moment i which i begged and she told me she loved me and if i would accept her if she chose to come back . And then told me she dosent carre about me and no more together. Tommorrow ill see her and i dont know how to behave because i know she loves me, but i dont want it to be awkward i want to start eing atrractive and pul her to me . Thanks
Hello Manuel,
Thank you for your post and apologies for the time it took to get back to you. From what I understand your ex is really pushing your buttons and playing off of your insecurities in order to control and manipulate you. Your challenge should be to control your emotions and to not show her that you are affected by her behavior. You need to be more alpha and to also start to engage and pursue other women in order to give her a taste of her own medicine. Also know that you can use social media to your advantage in order to show her that you are moving on, happy and not waiting for her any longer. A bit of reverse psychology should help you to fix the balance of power between you both.
If you feel overwhelmed or need further support don’t hesitate to reach out to me in order to book a coaching session via phone or skype. It would be my pleasure to help you win her back if that’s what you truly want!
I wish you all the very best,
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi,
I have been dating this guy for a few months and it was great. He is
somewhat famous, older and very attractive and we met through friends of
friends. It all started very heavy and we were sleeping with each other
every day for a few weeks. He was constantly calling me, texting, face
time, etc… even when he was away traveling. I met some members of his
family and many of his friends and he even made sure that I stopped
dating another person I was dating when I was with him. He took me on a
trip with some of his friends over the holidays and then when we were
there we had an argument about stupid things and I left early and when
he came back the relationship was a bit more distant. Keep in mind he
was saying we were together to people when we were on vacation and he
never had that conversation. I also became more distant as a result and
he called one one night stating he was depressed and wanted me to come
over, but I was out with friends and he texted me saying not to worry
about it and he would see me the next day. I called him the next day and
he said it was just a moment and he invited me to go out with him that
day – but in a very rude tone and I perceived him as just blowing me off
– Two days later I went to see him at his place and confronted him
about it about 1 hour into our visit and I went kind of crazy saying
like “should I expect this kind of behavior in the future, I will not be
talked to by anyone in that manner, etc..” and he said I was reading
him completely wrong and I apologized. It has not been the same since. He also told me he was mad about when I did not come over when he was depressed but he told me not to and I said I am not a mind reader. He also said he was still mad about our argument on vacation… I asked to hang out with him that weekend and he said yes if there was no
drama and I said of course and then he did not follow up. Then I texted
him stating that the only reason I was mad at him was from a
miscommunication between us and he said that he didnt understand and
that if I was mad I should have brought it up at that moment and that he
was still very shaken about the argument. I don’t like to talk via text
or on the phone about those things so I obviously waited to do it in
person. He was flying out internationally for a few weeks after that and
said he would let me know the date he was flying out that week – since
there was a storm coming – and he flew out that week and said he was
coming back on X date and would see me then. That date was one week ago
and he has not contacted me at all. He has posted pictures on social
media stating that he misses X place where we were on vacation. I have
posted pictures on social media since during the three weeks he has been
away, I have gotten into amazing shape and been hanging out with
friends. – I stopped drinking while with him and now I started again and
he clearly knows that – Last night I found out he blocked me on
facebook and I don’t know if I should contact him. I contacted him
before and found out he was going away and we made plans to meet up this
week, only because I contacted him.. but those plans obviously didn’t
come through. The last time I texted him was 14 days ago, and the last
time he texted me was 14 days ago as well. I am infatuated with him and
could definitely see something but I honestly feel concerned that
instead of putting effort and communication into finding out with I was
so upset an where the miscommunication occurred – I WAS falling in love
with him and was probably getting a little needy, but never showed it
until then with that blast out -. But I believe he is used to people
reaching out to him… and so am I. I’m not sure to take the facebook
block as flattery or a very bad sign, or both. Yesterday was the first
day I started getting over him and not thinking about him ALL the time. I
just want another perspective on the situation since I honestly am not
sure where to begin. I am sure he would answer my text, but I don’t know
where to go from there. I do not want to play any games but I also am pretty sure he is not thinking about why I was mad at him in the first place.
Hey Eric,
Thank you for sharing your story and apologies for not being able to get back to you sooner; I have simply been overwhelmed with coaching requests around V-day. I do agree that you became needy and thus a bit over dramatic which pushed him away. I think that it is possible for you to get back with the one you love if you are ready to put in the work and control your emotions – I would love to help you get there! The best would be for us to speak over the phone or via email in order for me to guide you in the best possible way. If you are seriously committed to doing everything possible to get him back than I urge you to get in touch with me!
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
Ps: Him blocking you on FB is a good sign!
My boyfriend or now i guess ex blocked me on Facebook and kik before that happened we was great spent alot of time together talked about everything and was very much in love then he started going through rough patch in his life we was barely talking then he text saying he moved to better his life so i was asking him what about our relationship and how are we gonna last he was telling me when he get a job and place he will move me there but while we was talking he blocked me in middle of the conversation on Facebook then i kik him and was blocked on there to
Hi, this is my story.. so i was with my ex for 8/9 months he broke up with me 5 months ago i gave him a month or two space after bugging him to get back together he kept telling me to leave him alone and i did after. So i went on NC but I wouldn’t have contacted him after the month and half of NC if he didnt block me, at first he blocked me on fb which he has done it previously and got a reaction out from me but this time i didnt react during the NC then after a month and a half of NC he blocks me again but this time on instagram and thats when I reacted and asked him on whatsapp why he goes “because were through” but the reason we broke up was cause he had his own problems because of family, financially etc but I supported him through out the whole situation when we was together and then he breaks up with me cause he sees no future anymore cause of his situation and needs to face his own problems doesnt want to burden or waste my time and ruin my life which I told him he wouldnt because i want to be there for him and support him but he wasnt having it kept telling me to leave him be. Anyway just 2/3 weeks ago when I broke the NC and he still didnt want to speak i tried for few days so he blocked me on whatsapp. 5 days ago i have been contacting him on his number on text cause i was an emotional mess told him I needed him because i had problems going on and not been eating sleeping needed his support literally told him how i felt about him and wanted him to be there for me and told him to give me a chance to prove to him that he can trust me as well but he seemed not bothered he says “sorry I cant be speak to you cause its not right” anyway after trying to convince him for a while he got abit angry cause i told him “a real man doesnt pursue a woman then leave them the way you did and you promised you’ll never leave me no matter what and i actually fell for it.. Etc” after that he rang me i thought he was gonna be angry but was calm and told me to stop and leave him be we spoke for like a minute after 5 months i heard his voice again.. i thought he was gonna be angry but he seemed calm after he heard me. Then he hung up & text me saying i will end up hating you and i dont want to so i beg you stop or else im gonna block ur number. I’m confused at how he has blocked me off everywhere else but not my number anyway i told him if you really loved me you wouldnt hate me then he said “i dont love you anymore i dont love anyone so leave me be”… Honestly that hurt did he mean it? and thats when i left him alone this was just few days ago now i have decided after that i cant contact him again and i wont.. Is there a chance of us ever getting back together? We was good together planned a future and everything and i’m a committed person to see all that go just like that..
Hello Missy,
Thank you for sharing your story. I think that you are still very much emotionally dependent on your ex and that is the main thing preventing you from being in the best possible circumstances to get back together. I urge you to check out this article: https://www.withmyexagain.com/blog/being-emotionally-dependent/
in order to start to turn things around. If you need further support, feel free to reach out to me for a one on one coaching session, it would be my pleasure to help you reach your goals.
Sincerely,
Adrian
My ex and I been together for 2 1/2 years. Eversince his dad passed away from cancer, he started acting really cold and distant towards me. He started neglecting our relationship but I would still go out of my way to make things work. Couple months later, he got caught up with his business and told me he will be spending all his time at the shop. I would still contact him here and there to ask how he is doing and if we can grab somehing quick to eat. He would always refuse and tell me not to text him so much. Then one night, I was bartending at my work and his coworkers came in for a drink. They told me he was off this whole week so he was lying to me about his whereabouts. I admit I got furious and drove to his house to confront him. He didn’t want to face me and yelled “I hate you and I don’t love you anymore. I’m begging you to leave me alone. You’re getting in the way! I never hated someone so much before! You’re crazy” I fell into a really depression after that night. I was so hurt that I kept calling and begging him to come back to me for 3 weeks. I know I pushed him even further away. He blocked me everywhere. I been in no contact for a week now.. I’m so heartbroken. I know Its my fault for not giving him the space he wanted.. My friends told me that he still has all our pictures up on Facebook/Instagram and still have our relationship status up. It’s been a month since we broke up. He still has all my belonging in his house and won’t give it back. I’m so confused. I also feel so pathetic waiting for him to come around again.
Hello Jennie,
Thank you for sharing your story with me and apologies for taking so long to get back to you…I was pretty sick!
I understand why you would feel so down, and no matter what he is going through he should not speak to you that way. I know you love this man but the way that he spoke to you seemed out of line and inappropriate.
That said it is very common for men that are grieving the loss of loved one to completely detach themselves from a relationship. I am sure that your couple faced all sorts of other issues but this loss surely impacted your relationship the most and pushed him to the brink.
I think that your best move is to go pick up your stuff and to then give him space. He will soon realize that he needs you and loves you, and that his anger and frustration comes from within.
You made quite a few mistakes by begging and pleading and so I urge you to follow that visit up with another 3 weeks of no contact before attempting anything else. It takes time to recover from such a long relationship… but I do believe that it is still possible to turn it all around.
Don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you need more support and guidance, it would be my pleasure to help during the course of a one on one coaching session.
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
Ok so me and this guy were hooking up but we were not dating however it felt like we were. Then I invited him to a dance with me but he couldn’t go so then I took one of my guy friends. After the dance I posted a picture with this other guy and then the guys i was hooking up with saw it and blocked me. He also unfriended me on snapchat and we haven’t talked since then. Why do you think he blocked me and hasn’t talked to me. If we were just friends not dating.
Hey Kimberly,
Sorry for the delay in getting back to you!
I think that you two clearly had a different understanding of what was going on… He clearly felt a bigger commitment to you, and felt that you were not serious or into him enough. If you care about this man and think that you could be happy together I urge you to reach out to him via phone in order to talk about this misunderstanding.
If you are unsure as to what to tell him or how to approach it, then I urge you to reach out to me and to book a coaching session in order for us to put a plan in place.
I wish you all the very best either way.
Sincerely,
Adrian
My girlfriend left after one year. situation is a little complicated but ill try to give short version. everything was great for 11 months then i had surgery which took me a little longer to heal and i only sen he 2 in that whole month, i cancelled a lot from being sick. she also suffers from SAD and depression. so finally when i see her she said things weren’t the same (this is through text) that she lost feeling for me it was too long of a break and i promised i wouldn’t be away that long. i said i was sorry and ill fix it but she said she cant forgive me that seeing me will only make her remember everything bad and not good . ok what was bad…i was living with a a girl but we broke it off and only stayed in such place till lease was done then me and new girlfriend were going to get a place. yes this bothered her but i told her this even before we got together. anyways i go crazy texting her and i gt blocked , i never seen myself without her, i even said id move put today but she said no. there’s a lot more but that’s the short version. i love really hard and believe me when i say i don’t chase but this girl i am and went too far cause i believe you fight for what you want. i’m beside myself have no desire to do this go out and meet new people , i mean i actually feel pain in my whole body over this. i didn’t do nothing to intentionally hurt her and can fix everything but she says she cant forgive me and now i cant contact her. we text 2 days ago for 3 hrs over this but now she blocked me. will she ever forgive me or even contact me again.w been broken up a month but i have contacted her everyday, once she blocked me only to call 3 days later. its not like we run in same circle or have same friends so its not like we will run into each other . i only have one way of texting her left i think but if i screw that up then it would kill any chance i had. what more disturbing is now she tells me she talking with an ex but she don’t wanna date him again shes not into it plus hes away at college. i just feel now if i did no contact there would be a void but also that now she’s filling it talking with him. is there any chance i have left to get my ex back?
Hey Joe,
Thank you for booking a coaching session with me. Working on a game plan right now to get your ex back and will be in touch with you tomorrow morning.
We can do this!
Best,
Adrian
Hello, this is my story…
My situation is sick because I really feel addicted to this guy . I’ve been dating other guys but my mind is still stuck on him. He’s a sailor stationed in Italy who’s leaving in Novemeber 2016. I’m Italian, I met him last summer we had great chemistry and we started as fwb. After 2 months he wanted a relationship but I was hesitant because I felt like he was rushing and I got out of a relationship a while before I met him so I needed time to recover.
We decided to take a break. The winter came and we both realized that we missed each other so we agreed that we had to meet up after he would have come back from New Year’s holidays. He stood me up for a date saying he fell asleep . I was so mad but I still wanted to see him. We didn’t get to meet until the Superbowl. I hanged out with him and his friends.
It was like no time was passed, It was the most intense night ever and he told me “baby,sorry, I wish you were my girlfriend but I’m leaving in 7 moths and driving 1 hour to meet you it’s too emotional“.
Then I soon realized that all I could have expected from this was fwb . We both knew I had strong feelings for him and he was driving me nuts , I was so tired of his games that I gave him an ultimatum either we had a relationship or I would have taken his “I’m not sure if I want a relationship” as a goodbye.
A week later it was Valentine’s Day and he posted about a date with this cheap stripper who’s not really his type for what I know about him. I felt humiliated and hurt . As soon as I saw this post, I texted him on fb that I was so stupid to trust him and that we were done once for all.
I deleted him from my friend’s list. He first sent me a friend request again, he texted “stop being mad stoppp” but I was hurt and I kept texting and he ignored my last message ,then blocked me.
When I realized that he blocked me I felt relieved, I was like “oh finally a permanent break up and no more emotional rollercoaster”.
The day after I looked for his ” date” on facebook. She was ” in a relationship ” with him. WTF He’s only known her for a week (at the Superbowl his friends were talking about these strippers they saw the day before).
I suppose he’s in a rebound relationship because the girl is a stripper and she’s not even pretty ( I’m not jealous but it’s a matter of fact… there are girls who could make me lesbian) so I guess he’s just using her to fulfill his sexual needs and boost his ego.
It’s been two weeks since he blocked me now and I still can’t believe he could be this immature. I really cared about him and I’ve never felt more heartbroken before.
I’m keeping No Contact, I deleted his number, mail . I wonder if he will ever unblock me and maybe realize that our relationship could have been worth to give it a try. I want to move on but our relationship was so special that I ask myself If Is there a chance of him realizing he hurt me or us ever getting back together?
Thanks
Hey Sara,
Thank you for sharing your story. The man that you are in love with doesn’t seem really mature, and frankly doesn’t deserve you from what I read. However, if you really love him and are prepared to forgive, I do think that it is possible to win him back…
Men almost always come back, as long as you don’t chase them around or put them on a pedestal. Now I feel that the nature of your relationship was a bit peculiar and I would need to know a lot more about it in order to provide you with a specific game plan. I urge you to touch base with me and to book a coaching session in order for us to speak on the phone or via skype in order to put a plan in place to win him back.
I wish you all the very best either way in your quest to find happiness with the man you love.
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
My story is pretty long but I need advice. So I live in Dallas and met this guy when I went out to visit in Atlanta. That was mid November. When I got back home we started talking. Texting and making calls. Fast forward to January we are still talking and he’s made it clear he wants to grow things out with me and work towards a relationship. Every time we have an argument he deletes me off Facebook. When I am upset with him he begs me not to give up on him and how we should work things out. This is February and we are still talking. So I paid my flight to Atlanta because a friend was having a baby shower and wanted to use this also as an opportunity to see him. I got there Friday and he made plans to hang out with his classmates at it was the end of semester. I got upset and told him that if I was in town at least he should hang with me or something. Next day Saturday we met, had sex. He said we are compatible. On Sunday I asked to see him and he said he’ll let me know. I didn’t take this lightly because I know what that meant. Meaning he doesn’t want to see me. Long story short we got in an argument and he told me today he just wants to be friends. Nothing more or less. He deleted me from Facebook and also blocked me. I am deeply hurt as I grew to like him a lot.
Hey Bess,
Thanks for sharing your story. You need to play a little more hard to get with this type of men, and not be as available and flexible with his attitude. He will come back around and unblock you like he has in the past…but next time you need to send him a strong message by blocking him back and making work a little bit to get back on your good side! Until then, don’t hesitate to highlight the fact that you are moving on, going out and having a good time via social media….don’t be fooled, he will be checking!
If you need extra support don’t hesitate to reach out and book a coaching session.
I wish you all the very best,
Adrian
Hey Adrian the first day he told me he wasn’t interested in being with me. I felt like I begged him a lot and probably was a turn off to him. Do u think this will reduce my chances with him? Nonetheless I am moving on already since he’s cut me off. How do I book a coaching session with you? Thank u
How do I book for a coaching session?
Hey Bess,
You can do so via this link: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/ or you can get in touch with me via email and I will send you an invoice via Paypal. I look forward to speaking with you!
Best,
Adrian
Hello Adrian I booked a coaching session but my email is having troubles. Can I reach u through an alternate email without having to pay again? Thank u
Yes reach out to me via the contact page here and I will reply and touch base: https://www.withmyexagain.com/contact/
Hey Adrian after a month he contacted me. Asking how I was doing. I replied saying I’m doing great and hope he is. I don’t know what next. Not expecting anything from him. I don’t know why he reached out.
On Monday when he told me he didn’t want to have anything to do with me and he was not interested in being with me. I sent him countless emails begging him. I felt I came off as desperate which is a turn off. Didn’t text him yesterday and don’t plan to. I just feel hurt that someone who always wanted to work things out with me just changed suddenly and bailed out. Do I stand a chance? How do I book a coaching session with you?
Hi, My story is long as well. My ex and I started dating when he deployed – together 1 1/2 years total. I’m 26 and he’s 25. We moved pretty quickly and everything was being pushed by him (relationship, saying I love you, texting all the time) all within one month of our first date. After a few weeks he told me he was wrong to say I love you but then immediately apologized, said he loved me and asked me to forgive him. Given the high stress of his job I did. A couple days later he cursed me out for saying I love you, again apologized and said his base had literally just been bombed. We were on and off again for awhile and he always came back when we would fight. During the holidays he had a very large verbal argument with my parents, and almost came to blows with my dad because my parents don’t like him. They feel he doesn’t treat me right. However, he has a lot of issues with anxiety and he’s in the military which is obviously stressful so I make a lot of allowances for that. He is a good guy deep down. Before this we had been great for a few months, he told me he learned what love was through me and was in the happiest place in his life. He would send flowers to me, text me every morning to say good morning and took me to my favorite place for Christmas. He even bought girly towels for his house in my favorite color just to make me happy. After the fight with parents he immediately broke up with me and blocked me. A couple days later we met in person (he called me) and he asked if we could be friends as he didn’t feel he was mature enough for a relationship. I said yes and then a week later he blocked me again saying he wouldn’t meet my expectations. I miss him very much and it’s been three months. What do I do?
He’s broken up with me probably 3 times and this is the second time he’s used blocking after it. The first time he used blocking it was for 2 months. I’ve told him before that despite his fears he isn’t good enough for me, will disappoint me and despite his anxiety it doesn’t change anything for me. I love him and will support him through his deployments and military career. I’ve also told him I don’t care what other people think that I know who he is and really want to be with him.
Hello Kathy,
Thank you for sharing your story with me!
I am touched by what you are going through and by your compassion.
The man that you love may be suffering from some sort of PTSD and his emotional instability has been the root cause of the roller coaster that’s been your relationship for the past year and a half.
This is much deeper than I can address in the comments section of this article and I think that it would be best for us speak over the phone in order for me to fully grasp the intricacies of your story.
I sincerely hope that you will have the means to book a coaching session with me so that I can help you maximize your chances of winning him back!
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi Adrian, I just booked a session. How long should it take before I’m contacted and will I be speaking with you?
Thanks!
It was a pleasure speaking with you and congrats for what you have already been able to achieve. I know that the recent developments on his side have thrown a monkey ranch and that you are seriously doubting that he will ever come back to you, but I believe in you and all that you brought to his life! I hope to speak with you again today to tweak our plan a bit following what you found out.
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
Hi, my story is kinda long but I’m 19 and my ex is 18. We met in high school and we talked for about 4 or 5 months before we actually started to date. One of the reasons we waited for so long was because he had a child from someone else and at the time his parents didn’t approve of our relationship. But eventually he asked me out and I said yes of course. We had alot of drama with his family and the mother of his child. I always stayed civil with both sides even when they weren’t with me. But my ex and I always fought to prove how much we loved each other no matter what. We didn’t have the easiest relationship and we fought a good bit but we always knew how much we loved each other and recently we hadn’t really argued about anything we were ok. We stayed together for almost 3 years but a month ago we had a fight and we stopped talking for about a week and once we started talking he told me he needed space and didn’t want to be in a relationship anymore, and that it wasn’t the right time for us because he needed to get his head on his shoulders and that he couldn’t apparently if we were together. We fought about it for a few days but eventually I told him I understood and that I really loved him so I’d wait. And he replied that he didn’t want me to wait and so on but he loved me also. We ended the conversation on that note. I tried to do 30 day no contact and after tomorrow it will be exactly 30 days. He contacted me a week after our last conversation just to say hey and I didn’t reply. A little while after that I got another message that said “can I get my shit yet?” Again I didn’t reply, I took his things to his mom and didn’t reply to him. After our break up i deactivated my Facebook for awhile (didn’t want to see his posts) Half way through this he unblocked his child’s mother on facebook when he always had her blocked when we were together by his own choice. But she had posted a picture of him and her son (she wasn’t in the picture but took it) and put it on his wall. I reactivated my account finally to see this, my old profile picture was him and I so I changed it to just myself and no longer than about 5 mins did I do that he blocked me from facebook. (However he still has all of my family members and friends on his facebook, just not me) I’ve talked to some of his family through this but tomorrow will be 30 days since there’s been no actual conversation with him and I. In the beginning I was just trying to successfully complete 30 days to not contact him but after tomorrow 30 days is up. I’m not sure what to do now that he’s blocked me from Facebook or not contacted me lately.. I was originally going to text me after the 30 days but I don’t know what the best approach should be now, please help me?
Hey Alacie,
Thank you for sharing your story with me! You are indeed in a bit of complicated situation for several reasons and the best way forward may be for us to speak over phone during the course of a one on one coaching session in order for me to advise you effectively. The fact that he blocked you shows that he still has feelings for you, but he will continue to slowly gravitate towards the mother of his child if we don’t do something fast! I sincerely hope to hear from you soon in order to help you meet your goals.
Best,
Adrian
Hello CoachAdrian, I have no idea how to message you on here. I have a question of my own to ask you.
Hey Denise,
Simply type your question in the join the discussion box above the comments and below the article…it would be my pleasure to help!
Looking forward to hear from you.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hello!
Things with my ex ended badly. We were on and off for a couple of months and towards the end I told him off and we got into a fight because I felt like I had to, and blocked him from absolutely everything. After a week or two I got over the fight and decided to unblock him because he had mentioned he still wanted to be friendly with me, but I noticed that he had blocked me right back. I figured that eventually he’d unblock me, but it’s been a month since I last spoke to him and he still has me blocked and it’s bothering me. I don’t know what to do.
-Betsy
Hey Betsy,
How long were you guys together? and how old are you both?
Depending on your answer, it may be best to simply reach out via text or email to check up and re-engage dialogue without talking about the past or your relationship.
The best would of course for us to talk on the phone during the course of a one on one coaching session in order for me to advise you in the best possible way.
I sincerely hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hey, I wanted some piece of advice too. Idk if this applies in my case but here we go.
Well I met this guy in a fun purposes app, not dating one. I interacted to him and we had some fun. Till then, he didnt add me back. One day I casually said in an indirect way he didnt then he apologized and added. At the very beginning I asked his name and he told me on private on instagram. I also already knew his profession. After a while, I seen on instagram he added some girls from the first app he barely knew and flirted with him openly, which I never did, though he did to me when he had the chance. I got mad at him why he added them there and not me then we argued and he thought I was being jealous. I later said I’m sorry because I overreacted, and he became more distant. He said it was ok but I gave him a lot of stress and almost blocked me. Ok, so then I continued interacting and he was friendly. I know he likes the type of beauty and cultural background I got.
When it was my birthday I said I’d congratulate him on his if we were still playing with the app. Afterwards I discovered by myself he’s married, which he doesn’t know I know, so the flirting game was over to me and I decided just being friends with him. The thing is, I just don’t understand why he would leave me in the shadows on instagram while he could add these other ones, and also like model slutty types pics having his wife there.
After a while, I got a job related to the language he speaks and thanked him for helping me and I used his name on a message for the first time, and he gave me all credit for that. Then, a little after I just asked why he had to live outside home for work during the week. He didnt reply. On the same week, I just casually went to linkedin to see some friends profiles and typed his name there just out of curiosity And being friendly I swear. The day after that he just messaged me like if I didnt tell you is because I didnt want you to know, why are you so interested in me or what I do? Then blocked me on both. I got so shocked with his reaction… Seriously I think at this time he was the one who overreacted. Then I decided leaving him alone though I got hurt and confused.
After a month and a few days I messaged him telling happy birthday through another chat app we didnt use till then. I didnt know which day it was and said I was feeling silly after all, but told him to have a great day and happy easter too. He didnt reply to this but I know he read and didnt block me on that and I do know he got happy by that because of his mood on the first app changed and he seems happier. It’s been a week since then, and I really wish he’d speak to me again…wish I could be friends with him and tell me about his wife as I’d be glad being friends with her too. Don’t know what to do to reinitiate contact and what to do. 🙁
Hey Lara,
To be perfectly honest I don’t that it is worth pursuing a friendship with this married man. Clearly his actions are shady and he isn’t looking for friendship. Given that he is married and that nothing ever happened between you two; I think that it is best for you to simply move on and look to find someone that is right for you. I could help you find the one if you are interested in working me…all you have to do is reach out to me : )
I wish you all the very best.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Well, the timing was wrong when we got together. I had just got out of a relationship a few months ago and he had just got out of a relationship. It was during the summer of 2011 when we got together. I wasn’t always a good girlfriend to him. I could’ve did better, but I didn’t. He was a really good guy. I kept being up my previous relationship. Which was wrong. We didn’t have a bad relationship. His feelings for me grew stronger everyday. We had got into it one night, and the next night he came over after his baseball game. We talked, but it wasn’t about the arguement. He was like I have something yo tell you, but I don’t want to say it because you’re going to say it’s too soon. I kept asking him to tell me and he finally said am in love with you. I was like are you sure your aren’t feeling lust in etc. He was like no it’s not lust. Even though I didn’t love him or anything. I told him I love you, but am not in love with you. He wanted me to come to school with him at one point, but I didn’t want to attend his school. I already had a school I was attending. We were together almost 7 days a week. We weren’t together long though. Summer was ending and it was time for him to head off to school. We still talked all the time in etc. So, things were going good for a couple of week. The weekend he finally came home we got into it. He hung out with his friends that night and I was upset. But, we patched things up and went out the next night. That night we got into another into it again. We were at the movies. His phone kept ringing and I was like who is that he said it’s my brother calling to tell me he made it home which I knew was a lie. I asked him again he said it was my godsister calling, and I didn’t want you to get mad. Which I knew was another lie, because I had already met his godsister. We didn’t talk for about an hour until he said I love you. Of course we made up in etc. I didn’t see him the next day. He had left back out for school. The following weekend I only seen him one time for about 5 minutes and that was on a Saturday. Sunday finally got here he came over to say bye. So, on his way to school we got into it AGAIN. I was like well let’s break up and we did. I wanted to get back together, but he didn’t. We talked some after the break up not that much though. I still had feelings for him. So, I guess in November we really stop talking. 2012 came around he message me on Facebook asking how school was good in etc. We basically patch things up and didn’t talk sense 2012. So, I seen him last year of course we didn’t speak. I was cool with that, because I was over him. A few weeks ago I seen him at a party we didn’t talk or anything. After it ended my older sister seen him and called him to her car. They talked about 60 seconds and his whole head was inside the car and he didn’t acknowledge the fact I was in the car with her. I thought then he would’ve spoke, but he didn’t. My feelings were hurt this around and I have no idea why. When we never speak anyway. I’m not saying I would like to start back dating him or anything. It just hurt this time around knowing that he didn’t acknowledge me after all these years. Last year in April I sent him a friend request on Facebook, but a few months later he deleted me.
Hey Denise,
Thank you for sharing your story.
Reading your words, I’m not entirely too sure of what you want; is it your ego talking because this man does not consider you as he once did…or are you genuinely trying to make it work because you still have strong feelings for him?
If you know what you want, or even if you are confused and looking to figure it out, I believe that I could help you achieve your goals.
So don’t hesitate to reach out and book a coaching session with me if need be!
Sincerely,
Adrian
I don’t think I want to get back with him. I guess it’s the fact he doesn’t consider me as he did once before. Which is understandable! Thanks!
Hello, I’m in a huge dilemma that is causing me alot of heartache. I fell in love with a man and he I. We would spend every day and night talking about everything. He gave me support as I did for him. He’s in the army and was stationed in Afghanistan. Soon after arriving two of his men were shot and killed. Immediately after he said he felt cold and uncaring and that he needed space. I gave him some but would tell him how much he means to me alot and how I couldn’t wait to see him. Before coming back he wrote to me and said we are too different and he doesn’t want a relationship. We spoke on the phone when he came back and I made an idiot of myself and cried and said we balanced each other. Previously he also said he felt different and that he was pretending to care and had to force himself to read my messages even though he had no desire. He’s back to normal with everyone else and he just blocked me on facebook. I know he cares but I don’t know what to do. Please help. We’ve talked about it before and he even said while he was away that he was detaching not to feel. We cared about each other alot and would drive hours to see each other. He told me I was the first girl he’s ever been in love before. He told me to wait for him and I did for 9 months. We were each others safe place. Now he told me he doesn’t want to talk to me or see me because he doesn’t want a relationship anymore.
Hello Kayla,
Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story with me. I do believe that I can help you turn things around but it will take some time as many many mistakes were made. However if you are patient and able to follow the step by step plan that I will lay out for you I believe that I can help you win him back!
If you are serious about doing everything possible to win him back, please book a coaching session with me ASAP in order for us to get started.
I sincerely hope to hear from you soon.
all the best,
Adrian
How do I book a session? Does it cost anything?
How do I do that? It’s hard because he’s deploying again in less than a year
You can book a session via the following link: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
hello, so my ex and i were dating for 2 years and broke up with me because he said he needs space, be on his own, and be single for a change. Of course i have talked to him and messaged but now i am blocked on everything. He told me i am hanging around the wrong people and not to make choices that i will regret and that ill come crying to him about my choices. I told him he shouldn’t care since he broke up with me but told me he still cares about me. since the break up he has told me he still loves me twice and last time he talked he was blaming me for everything thats going on that i am turning his friends against him and that he doesn’t love me. He keeps telling me his parents broke up twice and they got back together ( started dating same time we did). Told me we can’t be friends needs time but when we walk past each other he says hi and get upset if i don’t say it back or look at him. when he found out i am going to hangout with other guys and he tells me to be careful and that he not gonna hook up with anyone. Is he just playing mind games?
Hey Jasmine,
The signs are very good here…his actions and words tell me that getting back together is within reach! Him drawing a parallel between you guys and his parents is huge; also he is acting like a man that is not ready to let go.
You still have a communication platform and thus a way to prove to him that you can make him happy, even if he says that he doesn’t want to be friends.
It would be my pleasure to help make things right if you are serious about getting back together; just book a coaching session and we could get started!
All the very best,
Adrian
What is he wanting then? Just space or is he trying to move on and can’t?
He wants to feel fulfilled in a relationship wish you, to see you evolve and prove to him that you can indeed make him happy. He may also be fighting his own insecurities and may need space to overcome them… I hope that we can work together so that I can provide you with more insights.
But he doesn’t want me around ? Give him the space and let him see he isn’t happier without me?
Jasmine if you want a more in depth plan of what to do you will need to book a coaching session; during this call I could provide you with answers to all of your questions!
All the very best,
Adrian
Hello, My ex girlfriend left me a month and week ago, she dumped me over text and she said her decision was “final” and no negotiations. She said she lost feelings for me and couldn’t get over our last argument how I made her feel? We didn’t have a big argument I never swore or anything to make her feel uncomfortable so I didn’t understand.. Anyways I said I was sorry and brought her to a basketball game and she was emotionless towards me I broke down and said I’m sorry for whatever I did. Over the 4.5 months together I can say I made my mistakes she kept warning me about… I was too clingy, possiissve towards her. But she suffering from depression I was always there for her I treated her like gold and she told me how lucky that she has me etc.. Long story short she also came over for my moms birthday the night before she broke up with me and I saw she off that night and she kept saying she was just exausted and how I Always bring up the same issues… When I all I was asking if she was okay…furthermore when she dumped me I begged and cried which was my mistake to do… Then I called her dad since I was close work me and explained she decided to breakup with me and he respected me a lot calling him. I also texted her saying I want my stuff back and everything and when she found out I called her dad she said to me I crossed the line and how she now hates me and doesn’t want to see me again…? She was crying and agreed to leave my stuff on her porch the next day and she never followed up nor did I go to her house to check. Eversince the breakup I haven’t heard from her at all and she blocked me from Social media… I tried to send her 2 messages saying I’m sorry for my faults and if we can talk in person… No responses.. A few week after the breakup I see on snapcnat under added you menu I saw her name says -Added you back- not sure what that means… But overall I haven’t heard anything I don’t want to loose her… I love her more than anything and I don’t know what to do anymore….
Hey Sal,
I sincerely believe that I can help you win her back if we work together… you lost her simply because you put her on a pedestal and you were too needy. By giving someone too much importance and smothering them with love it is easy to actually push them away. We would need to put a strategy in place that will start to shift the balance of power in your favor by giving the space and time to realize all the positives that you brought into her life. It is possible to win her back but you will have to be willing to do the work, to control your emotions and to go through a process of personal development.
I hope that you will book a coaching session soon so that we can put you inn the best conditions to get it done!
Sincerely,
Adrian
I know… I realize it now I was being too needy and possiissve… I think it frustrated her to the max and did this cold hearted breakup.. How can I get her back..? It killing me everyday…
Like I said, if you are serious about doing everything possible to win her back…and do it the right way; the best is for us to work together during a coaching session over the phone. I cannot give you the full scope of what needs to be done in one comment reply.
Hope to speak with you soon.
Good luck either way.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Okay How can we talk? Thanks
You can book a coaching session via this link: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Looking forward to it!
Adrian
Hello, I don’t want to get back with my ex or anything. I’m confused as to why I keep thinking about him. I’m sure he’s with someone else, but that doesn’t bother me. We’ve been broken up for some years. Whenever we see one another we act is if we don’t know each other. Is that normal? I did send him a request on Facebook a while ago, but he deleted me a few months later. I’m not sure why though.
Things can indeed get awkward between exes after a breakup. You shared your life your biggest secrets, your fears and insecurities, and envision a common future that failed to come to fruition up to this point. All that could lead to shame or guilt and eventually to those awkward moments or even to confusion because reminiscing is bitter sweet. Hence why your ex may have added you only to delete you shortly thereafter.
All my best,
Adrian
I’m not sure I understand what you’re saying about why he added me.
part of him misses you and wants to know what you’re up too
Thanks Adrian! I thought it was because he hated me or some sort. So, us not speaking and acting like each other never existed is normal for ex’s?
Adrian, I also have another question. Sorry! If I see him again should I speak or act is if doesn’t exist? I don’t mind being cordial with him, because the past is the past. I feel as if he won’t speak back, so I just act like he doesn’t exist. I’m not sure how he feels, but I feel nerves.
Shan it seems that you have a lot of questions and that you are not at peace with where things stand, so the best is for you to book a coaching session so that I can answer all of your questions and provide you with a plan. Hope to speak to you soon!
Sincerely,
Adrian
How do I book a session?
https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
I am excited to help you!
Best,
Adrian
How do I book a session?
My boyfriend and I broke up a couple days ago. We had been snippy with eachother, he said his feelings had changed because of recent events. We are both stressed out with school and his new job. He had wanted a break from us and I just couldn’t so he ended it to get his space. I didn’t act like I cared but deep inside I was furious. I ended up saying some things that shouldn’t have been said and he said it shouldn’t have ended that way. I cried and cried and tried contacting him, which I know was bad. But he was my bestfriend. I went to his house cause I had to see him, his parents met me outside and hugged me. My ex came outside and we talked, he said he wants time that he deserves. He said he loves me and always will just needs time. I love him so much and tried to stress that if there was a second chance that I would change for the better. He said he will contact me in two weeks. He wants to see what it’s like single and see if he wants to work it out later or leave it be. Recently I liked a photo of his on Instagram and he blocked me. What does that mean? Did I do something wrong? Please help.
Hey,
He blocked you because he really needs space and felt like you invaded is privacy going through his pictures. The space and the breakup also applies to his “social media universe”. Stop chasing him at this stage otherwise you will push him away for good.
I would advise you to not reach out to him for the two week period, but to continue to post epic or cool pics on Instagram to prove to him that you are not going to let a potential breakup prevent you from being happy and moving forward (I know it’s counter intuitive!). Then I think the best way to reconnect is to write him a hand written letter that we could draft together if you are willing to work with me to turn this thing around.
I would help you ensure that it’s perfect, and tailored to what he needs to hear to trust that he can be happy with you moving forward.
I wish you all the best either way!
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
Thank you! I like hearing this from a professional. Where do I send the letter too…I had already done that before you said it.
Book a coaching session with me and we will work on it together, first over the phone and then via email.
I think I lost him forever
my bf & I were in relationship for 8 month a serious one
we was friends before he tells me he loves me
we know each other for 3 years
a year ago he came & tell me he want me with him then he brake up because he think that my parent will refuse & had a money issue
we get back 8 month ago & my parent agree & we start a serious relationship to get married
but there’s a difficulties ( money & his school & he may go to military as requested in our country)
last month we had a many fights
I was so needy ,so clingy
we had fights so break for days & get back & get fight again
for a month he was in huge stress
last 2 weeks he break up with me because he’s not happy with me
I beg him a lot but he change his number & block me on facebook
I always beg him after every fight & he get back
but we get fight again
some fight in small things
but I think he is so stressed so he get upset for any word
I admit that I was wrong in most fights
I miss him , we have a great memory before
I was turned to someone I don’t like
needy
clingy
talking too much
I think I lost him forever
he’s the one who start the no contact & refuse to be friends
I don’t know what to do to get him back & be happy with me again
I feel hopelees
help me please
Hey Noshy,
Thank you for reaching out and sharing part of your story.
Indeed it seems that you made quite a few mistakes; but it is most probably still possible to turn it around if you are motivated to make things right.
I want to help, and the best would be for us to do a coaching session via skype so that I can start to guide you in the right direction.
Wishing you all the best,
Adrian
Me and my ex been together for 12 years and have 3 kids she lost her virginity to me and we been together since but a lot of things happen we’ve broken up b4 by this time she blocked me from everything and she said she not in love with me no more I think I lost her for ever I need help I really want my love back what should I do its been a horrible 8mths
Hey Roman,
I recommend that you book coaching session with me for us to speak over the phone as soon as possible. I will need a lot more information about your relationship to figure out where things went wrong and to provide you with a plan to make things right.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Best,
Adrian
I was in a long distance relationship for about 6 months. I met him on vacation and then I flew to see him 3 times after that. He thought I cheated on him and we decided we would work on things when I came back after my work contract was up in a month and half. A week after I was home, I found out I was pregnant and things got very real and bad. He broke up with me because of our communication issues and I found out his first love of his life became single again when she reached out to him to go to church. He started developing feelings for her because she was able to talk about things big or small unlike me. The 6 hour time difference and now being pregnant made things worse on me. His ex went back with her boyfriend since she was pregnant by the other guy and now they are engaged. Things got a little better between us but then got worse because I was bitter that he left me to try and make things work with her. I booked a flight to see him to try and work on a friendship but that backfired. I left after 3 weeks and only seeing him twice. I sent him a heartfelt letter and package and told him that I should’ve listened to him and only contact him after the baby is born so he could get a paternity test. I broke my own rule by contacting him a week later because I missed him. We fought a lot over the phone and then I stopped talking to him for a month and a half. I now find out he is in love with his “best friend” that was a girl he hooked up with a few years ago that had left him to marry her baby’s father. During our relationship, he told me that she used him to talk to him when she’s feeling down/drunk and only started contacting him again when he was in a relationship with me. He told me I had nothing to worry about with the two girls when we would fight and now they have become my worst nightmare. I confronted him about his new love and we fought. The only thing he ever tells me is that I lied to him and that’s why we aren’t togther. I know he’s emotionally unstable but it makes me think if he ever really loved me. He wanted me to move in with him in the very beginning but I was cautious and we had fights because of his trust issues from his past. I knew that if I didn’t commit to moving, bad things would happen. I blocked him on Instagram a week ago and now he has blocked me on FB and Instagram. Since I’m pregnant, I know I have handled things very poorly and he would think that I didn’t ever care about him. We were suppose to go to couples communication classes this month but because we fought in January and told me I should’ve gotten an abortion, I told him I didn’t want to go anymore even though I fought him to be on board with it. Also, a weekish ago I told him I had a boyfriend and that I’m not allowed to contact him at all even when the baby is born. He got upset and told me that the guy I’m seeing is stupid and that we will always need to be in communication for our baby. (This is my drama in a nutshell) I want to move on from him but I believe we could be a happy family. It’s hard to get my mind off of him and I’m due in July. Maybe after July I will be too busy to think about him? I feel defeated. He told me he was thinking about getting back with me a few months ago but I guess I pushed him away with my nagging. I honestly know that if we don’t get help then there would be no point in being in a relationship with him.
Hey Angie,
Thanks for reaching out and for sharing your story.
You are indeed dealing with a very complex situation, being pregnant, in a long distance relationship, with a man who clearly has commitment issues.
I truly think that a coaching session together is the only way to make things right, your situations simply has too many layers for me to provide you with sound advice here. Book a coaching session and let’s work together to ensure that your baby has a mom and a dad that are together when coming into this world!
I hope to hear from you soon and wish you all the best,
Sincerely,
Adrian
We hadn’t been getting along since about Christmas. In Monday he decided to go out on his birthday with some “friend” and I haven’t called him since. While I feel we broke up … The words haven’t been said. But I am not calling him. Now what?
Hey,
I need more information in order to advise you appropriately here…
The best would be for us to speak over skype so that I provide you with the best feedback possible.
Let me know if you are interested in working together and we could it take it from there!
Best,
Adrian
Idk what to do at this point. My ex and I have been separate for just over a month now and I haven’t talked to him, haven’t tried to reach out nothing. Our breakup was bad but he blocked me on Facebook (even though he never goes on according to him/I wasn’t even using it that often) and the only thing we still shared like seeing each other online was skype but I never reached out to him. After a week of seeing him on, he apparently deleted me off of skype. I didn’t do anything except change a photo of me kayaking?! Why? Like I legit didn’t do anything (in fact he cheated on me and I only said he was right about his low self esteem and told him I still loved him but he needs to be on his own) like I didn’t yell. I didn’t stalk. I didn’t do legit anything to cause so much blockage. Can you explain this to me? Lol
He is still hurt, and anything that reminds him of you is still tough to handle.
Many people try to cope or to move on by shutting out the person that they were with completely…in almost every breakup both individuals experience considerable pain (for different reasons), even the person that decided to end things.
Best of luck,
Adrian
So my ex and I broke up for a second time a week ago ( he did it to on my birthday) and he blocked me right away on Facebook. He did this the first time we broke up. I know he has a lot on his plate and I gave him space. He’s fighting for full custody of his daughter and he was talking about all the money it’s will cost and how he shouldn’t of bought a new car. I felt bad and wanted to help him out and offered to send money to help because I felt so helpless and just wanted to do something. Was that so wrong? He wrote back a whole bunch of mean text messages and told me money is not a issue. Maybe I’m too needy or maybe I try to help out too much. I only wanted to help because I love him and wanted to be there for him, it hurts
Hey Liz,
Thanks for sharing your story…
I think that part of the issue is that you are in fact too nice and so in a way things became too easy and he couldn’t value you for all that you are.
I can help you change this around, so don’t hesitate to book a coaching session if you want us to work together.
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
My ex and I broke up 3 weeks ago, and he blocked me in all of his social media account. I plead and beg for him to talk to me for the past 2 weeks. I even used my friend’s facebook account to message him but he end up blocking them too. And now I begin the no contact rule for a week now. Do you think he will eventually unblock me? I don’t think he wants anything to do with me. I love him so much and I miss him.
Hey Victoria,
Thanks for reaching out and sharing your story…
If you follow the plan that I have laid out in this article I have no doubt that your situation will quickly evolve in your favor.
All the best,
Adrian
Hi Adrian,
My ex and I broke up six monthes ago, and she blocked me all of the contact. I did very needy and beg her since the breakup. Because we were in a long distance relationship, I was very insecure and needy when we were together. She is dating someone now and showoff in social media. I want to get her back but now I still in NY and my ex is in Taiwan. We haven’t contacted for three monthes. I dont know if she is foretting me or is there any chance I can get her back? Please give me some advices!!! Thank you!
My situation is like this but somehow different. My ex boyfriend had activated his facebook without me knowing while we we’re together, he had constantly told me he doesn’t care about social media but he blocked me while we we’re together so that I wouldn’t know then deleted pictures of him and I so when i found out I got mad and told him I no longer wanted to talk to him because he has cheated on me in the past once that I know of and I was just afraid he was going to do it again since he added a lot of girls on his Facebook. He told me that it was his decision on whether or not he could have a Facebook and if I didn’t like it then we can just stop talking. He changed his number and has not called me so I don’t know it. I deleted my Facebook today so I wouldn’t have the urge to post negative things because I did have that feeling that he was still searching my profile. Its been two weeks so far with no contact and still hear nothing. To be honest I do want him back but I just wish he would committee because I would give up all social media if it meant saving our relationship. what should I do I feel so empty and I can’t stop thinking about him wishing he would call me. Maybe I was wrong for what I said and I still have his mothers number. I can still get his new number but I’m trying not to due to the no contact rule
Hey Angelica,
Thank you for sharing your story. I think the best would be for us to speak via phone during a one on one coaching session in order for me to understand the full scope of your story…to be able to provide you with relevant and tailored advice to win him back.
It looks like you’ve made tons of mistake, but I think that blocking him on Facebook was the right decision because it’s going to provide you with the space to heal and grow…and be in the best possible situation to once again become a challenge.
I hope to hear from you soon, and wish you best of luck either way!
Sincerely,
Adrian
Guys help me…
My ex-bf and I broke up around 3 months ago.
We argued alot , he wants me to stop this shit and let us to be relaxed and after 3 days we meet eachother but I couldn’t… suddenly he ended the call and blocked me everywhere! Everywhere!!!
my phone number.SMS… Even he blocked 2 of my friends who had never met him before. He just know that they were my friends…
I dont know why…
I knew he was angry at me. I hurt him. I did something which I knew He hates them but we were good we had amazing sex life and Im sure he enjoyed…
By the way, I had one way to connected to him, so I send him 2 Email in 2 months.
I just said , Im so sorry , let us trying to be friend, I miss you so much and ….
I was sure he won’t answer but he answered me , after 3 months no news, no friendship…
He said that he is fine but he still has so many problems with my reactions and he can say that he couldn’t forget them. He doesn’t want think about them and, he wished that I have a good time,too.
I know it is not a good massage, but he had a reaction after 3 month and it is good yes?!
What should I do for being with him .? ?
Hey Paul,
Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story.
Despite the fact that your ex is dating someone else following a long distance relationship, it is probably still possible to win her back if you put the right actions in place!
You must evolve in order to learn from your mistake and to transform yourself back into the person that she fell for. Stop reaching out to her all together and focus on your own personal growth and transformation…then showcase it to the world via social media.
Even if she blocked you, she will be watching and take notice. At some point, if you follow my advice you will have an opportunity to prove to her that you are the one that can make her happy.
If you are serious about doing everything possible to win her back the best would be for us to work together during a one on one coaching session via phone or skype.
Best of luck either way!
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hey Nana,
Thank you for sharing your story.
The fact that he answered you is definitely a positive sign…but I will need to know a lot more information about you and your relationship in order to advise you appropriately (for instance how long you guys were together, and what you did to hurt this bad).
If you are serious about your commitment to make it work with this man the best would be for us to work together during a one on one coaching session via phone or skype so that I can provide you with a complete game plan!
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
Hi!
My date (never called him my boyfriend, but he called me his girlfriend to everyone) dumped me by text 26 days ago. We were only been going out for 2 months, but he would text and call me everyday, we just clicked instantly. He said he loved me very much and that I was amazing, but he needed to be by himself for a while to get his life back on track. And that he wanted us to have a talk when things had calmed down, and that he felt really bad about the text and wanted to talk to me instead. But he didn’t know what to say or how to do it, he just couldn’t get himself to do it when he looked at me. And his friends and mother all thought that even though he loved me, he should take his time and be by himself for a while. And not jump from one relationship to another right away. I replied that it would be easier for me to show him that I respected his decision, that everything had taken a toll on me too, but that I deserved more than a text. no reply.
Thing is that 4 months prior to us meeting, he just ended a 3 year long relationship. I actually helped him move his stuff over to his friends house…From the start, everything around us made it difficult. He moving out from his ex into an apartment with 4 friends of his. We could never stay at my place, cause I took my dad in a few months back so I live on the couch. So we were never alone. His ex constantly screaming on the phone or sending rude texts, his mother got seriously ill and still is, issues with his stepdad, the move/transition. His friends and family said they all loved me, and loved how happy I made him. That he constantly talked about me and how special he thought I was. When we weren’t busy taking care of everything that happened around us, we were pretty much perfect! We laughed together, cried together, we both agreed that we had never been in such an easygoing relationship. Talking about our future together, making a timeline, even named our future babies, haha! But then the text came…
I have not contacted him after I replied (as mentioned earlier), nor has he contacted me in any way. He’s always been the first to check out post on stories on snapchat, but this Saturday, he blocked me! Yes, that night I posted a lot cause I was having so much fun! He checked them all, and suddenly I was blocked! Not once have I sent anything to him after the break up, not a text, snap, anything. He hasn’t blocked me on anything else, just snapchat. But he’s the one checking my stories, why cant he just ignore it instead?
What do you suggest I do here? Give it even more time? I feel like I have to since he just blocked me on snapchat. So texting or calling him now would just make it worse. Or should I just move on? I just feel like us was to good to give up on, and that he just needs time to sort his life out by himself…we both used to say that “in order to be truly happy with someone, you need to take care of yourself first”, and I feel like that is what he’s working on right now…
I love this page, and I really hope you can help me out here with some great advice.
-Maria
Hello Maria,
Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story!
The fact that he blocked you on snapchat that night when you were genuinely having so much fun is actually a good sign… it means that he still cares and that he can’t stand seeing you happy and moving on.
I still think that it is possible for you to win him back, but you definitely shouldn’t reach out…
If you are serious about doing everything possible to potentially make it work I suggest that you book a coaching session in order for us to work together.
All the very best,
Adrian
Let me know how to go about this. He’s still blocking on things even after a few days no contact.
So I want to move fast.
Hi!
My boyfriend and I were together for a year. We both were extremely in love with one another at least so I thought. We argued a lot I was very controlling and hard on him and I know that. We had broken up often and had that on again and off again relationship but we always said no matter how hard it for we would always be together. We were trying to kids and talked about going to the court house and getting married it was a very passionate love. We had an abortion 3 weeks ago and we have been arguing still and broken up once since then. He says really mean things when we go through break ups like he doesn’t want anything to do with me that he just wants to move on from tho and act like it never happened. But we usually get back together within a day or so. Yhis time he broke up with me 2 weeks ago and we were arguing in the car and I said that he didn’t look good that day and he flipped out and took me home and said he didn’t love me for the last month that he has been lying to himself convincing himself he does. He said he thinks about being with other people but it’s weird because he is used to thinking about me. I said I would change this time I even went to go see a therapiest and he still isn’t budging he says he wants space from the relationship and he wants to be single and do him and enjoy life he says he doesn’t think he will be happy with me.
I went to go get my stuff a week ago and we Layed in bed and talked he didn’t really want to kiss me or hold me because he didn’t want me to hold onto anything. He said he wants to see me one more time but he has no intention on getting back together but time will tell and he can’t tell the future. 3 days before he broke up with me he left flowers and a letter in my car saying that we may argue but he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and we will work through it. Of course I have texted him everyday almost to Try and convince him I’ve changed and we can be happy together. Our anniversary vacation is this weekend and when we broke up in the car he said we aren’t going together he is taking his friend.
We have still texted every other day because he was still willing to help me with something for my job. He still saying he doesn’t want to be with me and he only wants to see me one more time to be nice and help me but then he is cutting me out of his life for good. He bloked me and my best friend on all social media but he still text me back. We got into an argument yesterday and he said he doesn’t love me anymore and he can’t trust he will be happy with me because he thinks I will just get comfortable and do the same things. I asked him why he said we could see one another every so often and he said he was being nice and that he wants nothing to do with me. He wanted to cut me out of his life so bad he can’t stand it. I told him we can be adult and stop arguing and see one another again as adults before we cut out of one another lives. And he said no at first then said fine o still have some stuff of yours I’ll drop it off and be on my way. Then when I said something about our argument and growing up he said I’ll forget everything that happened just now I’ll see you when I get back from the vacation. He says I mean the world to him still and that he respects me and that he only cares for me that’s the only kind of love that he had for me.
How can he not be in love with me when he left flowers in my car and a letter that said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me 3 days before the break up. But now he doesn’t love me? How can he respect me but say all these awful things to me? How am I still his world why is he still replying and agreeing to see me again. He said even though I’m the world to him he can’t force himself to do something he doesn’t want to do and be with me. What does that mean? he keeps saying he can’t force himself into doing something he doesn’t want to do? Now he keeps flipping out just saying he doesn’t want to be with me and when I got my thing back from work I said thank you if you want to cut me out of your life I understand them he got mad at me because he says I got what I wanted then wanted to cut him out. And that I hadn’t changed but I was just giving him what he wanted. He’s so confusing
I love him with every bone in my body and he used to feel the same way to. He comes back from our vacation on Monday so I’ll probably see him on Tuesday but i want us to get back together. But he just is so done with me it seems and he wants to cut me out of his life.
What does all this mean
Hey Rita,
Thank you for sharing your story.
I think that you guys clearly have a special bond but along the way you experienced a serious communication breakdown and entered into a negative spiral. You let him cease control of the balance of power, and the way that he now talks to you is unacceptable. He has positioned himself has the decision maker of what will ultimately happen in your relationship and it doesn’t have to be this way.
You need to value yourself more and make him chase you; you need to be strong enough to not reach out to him for a while and even turn him down once or twice when he does reach out…and trust me he will reach out!
You are the prize and you need to make sure that your actions reflect that.
If you need help implementing this strategy to ensure that you are back into a healthy long term relationship with him then book a coaching session with me.
It would be my pleasure to work with you to ensure that you meet your goals and find happiness in love!
Sincerely,
Adrian
Do you think even after all of the cruel things he has said to me this time. That he actually still loves me and doesn’t hate me and want to cut me out of his life?
He blocked everyone on all social media and deleted pictures of us. Even when I text him he still replies and I don’t get it.
He says he says that he doesn’t want to be with me and that he wouldn’t mind being my friend. I’m just so confused!!
Should I see him when I get back like we planned?
Hey Rita,
You still seem to be quite confused and you still have many questions…the best would be for us to do a coaching session in order for me to provide you with clear sense of direction and a plan to get him back into your life permanently.
Hope to work with you soon to help you meet your goals.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hello I’ve been with my girlfriend for 4 months a week before 5. We both enjoyed as much time as possible together even in secret since the family didnt want me to show up. I really do love her and i support her for any decisions she made, logical one of course, but eventually she became busy i didnt mind cuz she enjoyed what she was doing but at that same time i lost my job and became desperate for attention i guess. As she already been stress out by her activities i kept asking her for attention, then i started to work on my self to improve but thats when she decided to break up. Trying to reason with her she decided that shes moving on and that i should too cuz we cant be together. But she said we can be friends still. So it was ok for another 2 weeks working on our relation then that’s when her sister found out and now went back to tell me to move on again. Thats she is sorry that she gave me so much hope for her. I just hope that i can still win her back in the future
Hey!
Thanks for reaching out and sharing your story.
You can use the friend zone as an excuse to reconnect and to start to hang out again and ultimately prove to her that you can make her happy.
Prior to engaging with her you will need to go through a serious evolution in order to not let your emotions get the best of you when you’ll be together.
I believe that I could help you get her back, so don’t hesitate to book a coaching session with me if you are serious about making things right.
Best of luck either way in your quest to be happy in love.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hey, my boyfriend broke up with me almost 2 months ago after we had been together for almost a year and a half. He told me that he just didn’t see a future with my anymore, but he still loved and cared about me. I was hurt and blown back, so I responded in the wrong way and kind of begged him back. I told him he was making the wrong decision. I probably called him 3 times doing this in the first 2 weeks of him breaking up with me and I texted him too, but not too often. He always answered my calls and even called me one time. He would reply to my texts, but stopped. So I finally decided to do no contact for 30 days which I did easily and worked in improving myself. So I reached out with him a couple days later with a friendly text just like a joke and he replied back to me and then I ended the conversation. I did it once more and was the one to end the conversation. Then I was cleaning out my closet getting ready to move and found a pair of his khakis so I texted him and asked him if he wanted them. He swore they weren’t his, but said yes he wanted them. I said that we could meet up or he could just come get them. He said he would come get them and I told him times good for me and just said hey I can just of it in a bag on the porch, but he insisted on coming that night to get it. So he came and I didn’t speak with him much just how are you and it was brief because I didn’t want to give him more information about me and everything. It seemed like he had something he wanted to say, but just didn’t say it. So he left and I didn’t speak to him, but about 3 days later I just text him and let him know to be safe outside and about a scare I had. He replied, but now a day later he decided to block me on Facebook. I honestly thought we were bein friendly and we had agreed to be friends, but then he blocked me. I don’t understand..
Hey!
The fact that he blocked you on FB isn’t necessarily a bad thing; many times people do this because it hurts them to see their ex…it means that part of him still misses or at the very least that he is not indifferent, otherwise he wouldn’t have bothered.
Overall I am very impressed by what you’ve been able to do and accomplish since the breakup!
I would love to coach you in order to help you take the next step…to provide you with tips to make him miss you even more.
If you’re interested book a coaching session with me so that we can start working together on getting you back into a relationship with this man that you love.
Wishing you all the very best in your quest for love.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi Adrian, how do I do that? How do I get to do counseling?
you can book a coaching session here: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Looking forward to working together!
Best,
Adrian
Hey,
I was with my boyfriend for 18 months, he ended things in January. Anyway we spoke pretty much once a week until March. He was/is having an affair with a married lady but he would always deny it and say they were just friends. Anyway, we had no contact for around 6 weeks then he contacted me and said he’d made a mistake etc, we met up he told me (half) truth about the other woman and said they weren’t talking anymore. However 2 weeks after we started talking again he made up with her and he posted on Twitter secret messages to her etc. Anyway I confronted him about her and I asked him why he would come back into my life to just do it again to me etc. He tried to lie about it again before saying it had nothing to do with me and I mean nothing to him. He then blocked me on everything. It’s been 2 weeks now of no contact again but I am struggling to deal with things every night I dream of them together.
Hey,
Thank you for your trust and for sharing your story.
I understand how disappointed you must be at the moment and you are clearly with a man who doesn’t value you as he should.
The mistake that you made was that you were too available, too quick to forgive when he came back into your life.
I can help you turn it all around but it will take time and patience.
If you are ready to do the work and committed to making it work with this man, then please book a coaching session so that we can work together.
It would be my pleasure to help!
Sincerely,
Adrian
I have a long and disappointing story I’d like to share. About 6 years ago, I met a young lady online. Off the top, there was an immediate physical attraction that drew me in with her but we lived in 2 different countries. I didn’t let this stop my pursuit of communication with her, but didn’t really know how far it would end up going at that time. We conversed quite often in the earlier stages (first 4 months or so) through instant messaging and live video chats, and I began to find myself very much into her, both physically and mentally. Her aura, kind hearted nature, and reciprocated interest towards me made me feel like I wasn’t making a mistake by keeping our communication open and frequent, and our feelings both began to develop stronger for one another.
We stayed in touch daily, expressing our strong desires of being with one another and carrying out the love and affection we always talked about from a distance, in person. After about 2 years of knowing and communicating with each other, she made her first trip to come visit me and it was amazing. Being with someone I had desired so intensely from afar for this amount of time, and finally having their presence available, even for this temporary moment, was quite a joyous experience. I can honestly say this was a mutual feeling, as I knew she was in love with me at this point. I felt the same way. Living so far from each other was difficult but the way we both felt for each other, and our willingness to openly communicate as frequently as we did gave us hope for a long lasting future together. Although in a long distance relationship there will always be atleast some slight concern for how the other party is behaving in your absence, I didn’t think (at the time) I had to give her faithfulness very much question. She even expressed slight uncertainty in my loyalty at times, but this was more or less due to not being able to see me given the distance between us. This is understandable but in all honesty, I was so into her and loved her to the point that she really never had to worry. I know for sure that I always respected her and remained loyal to her even in her absence.
2 more times over the next 2 years from her first visit, we met up for week-long getaways. Once again, everything felt right. Everything was perfect. Everything was so fun and amazing together. She ended up relocating cities during this time and we weren’t seeing each other as frequently as we would’ve liked up to this point in time of knowing each other, but the love never died nor did the communication. However, only a few months after our 2nd getaway together, I began noticing changes in the communication patterns. Summer had just hit. She took a couple of trips with her sister and friends, and on one of the trips, she expressed to me that regardless of whether or not I trusted her to the fullest extent, I should. She wanted to reassure and convince me that although she was around tempting situations on these trips (and maybe even back home as well), “she loved me and I loved her, which was all that mattered, and I had her loyalty”… But even being told this, I never completely counted out the possibility of her giving in to temptation and the advances of other men that may have interested her enough. This wasn’t me being insecure, by far. Rather, this was me being realistic. I never wanted that to happen of course. But there were even times in which I was also tempted to have “fun” with other willing women around me. However, I never did that and only hoped I would’ve received the same karma and loyalty from my love interest in return, given all I had been told by her. As that summer continued, we remained in touch daily as we had been for a few years now. I noticed she began telling me about hanging out with friends who’s names I’d never heard her mention before. She was partying and socializing. She was attending summertime bbq’s and things with new people more now than she had before. I always had a busy agenda with work, errands, and my own socializing as well, but never was too busy to make certain I was communicating with her enough. Still, there were many times throughout that summer when I would stop hearing back from her for the remainder of many nights, until the next morning or afternoon. This was a new pattern that had me considering the possibility of some disappointing things that were potentially occurring.
My schedule didn’t allow for me to make any arrangements to visit her that summer. I wanted to badly. I missed her and wanted to see and be with her again. So once that summer concluded, I made plans to visit her for my birthday that Fall. Then there was one day, exactly 2 weeks before my flight out, we didn’t talk at all. I reached out to her earlier in the day and received no reply. Seeing how this was a woman I had been in continuous daily conversations with for years straight, not hearing from her, even just this 1 day, was just a little bit out of the ordinary in my mind. As I stated earlier, our consistency in communication began declining in the prior summer months, but it was still never a day that went by where we didn’t atleast say hi to one another. A day or 2 later, she replied to me apologizing for being out of touch and stated that she “had a lot on her mind and was a little stressed with work and some other things going on in her life”. I tried to be understanding of this and of course wanted to know what was stressing her. But the coming days led to even more scarce and inconsistent communication. At this point, it was very clear to me something was up and it was serious. Knowing I’m due to visit her in several days and we aren’t even communicating about it was a red flag to me. I would’ve expected her to be excited and anticipating my arrival. Several days before my flight, she texted me in the morning saying she had something important to talk to me about and wanted to save it for later that evening. After I got off work and went home to unwind after a rough day, she texted me starting off saying how hard it was going to be for her to share this with me. She goes on to say how she had been questioning the relationship we shared, particularly at the start of that year and throughout it. At this point I couldn’t say I didn’t question it just the same but I always remembered what she told me during her trip about how loyal she was to me. Anyhow, she goes on mentioning the stress she was facing with new work responsibilities, family-related affairs, and her current health status. She confessed to me that earlier on in that summer she made the mistake of getting with someone and had regretted doing it every day since then. At the start of Fall she found out that she had gotten pregnant. She swore it was a mistake she only made “one time” and couldn’t allow herself to sleep with him again, despite the follow-up advances he made after their first encounter (which I often wonder if this was really true). She felt the need to share this with me knowing I had arrangements made to go visit her and wanted to give me atleast a few days to determine if I still wanted to go through with the trip or not, for obvious reasons. After being told this, I was almost at a loss for words. Then I became very angry because I felt like I knew all along this had happened due to our inconsistent communication that summer, especially at nights. I expressed my disappointment to her which didn’t help her feel any better of course, but then it felt like out of nowhere my brain shut off and my heart took control. I still loved her. I was gravely upset with the choices she made, but I still loved her and wanted to be with her. I still wanted to have sex with her (hysterical bonding).
I decided to go through with the visit and spent nearly 2 weeks with her. As with all the times of us being together before, this was yet again another fun and pleasurable experience, but was still very different too. Looking into her beautiful eyes and looking at her body, knowing she gave it to another man when all I had known before was her giving it all to me was painful to accept, but it had to be done. It was reality. We talked about the situation she was in. She expressed deep regret. She cried on my shoulder and apologized numerously. My heart wasn’t in a position to forgive her at this time but I knew with the way I loved her, I would be able to do so one day. She asked me if I would still be with her if she decided to go through with the pregnancy. I told her no, but also wanted to make it clear that I was in no way forcing the option of abortion upon her. That would be no one’s choice to make but her own and I respected her enough to leave that decision to her and preferred not to influence it, although I inevitably still would. She was so emotional at this time and wanted me to know that she wanted our future together more than anything. She reemphasized that nothing and no one was worth losing or hurting me. I believed her. She reassured me that the mistake she made didn’t take away from the love she had for me, and said she wanted a future and a family with me and no one else. At this time, I only wanted to support her because I loved her just the same, even knowing we had a very uncertain circumstance to face soon. It just seemed as if someone (either me or the unborn child) was bound to lose her. While spending this time with her, I pursued employment opportunities, hoping I would land a career in her city and start the rebuilding process of our relationship. I remained as hopeful and positive as I could be, but the decision to be made in the coming days was probably one of the most difficult things for either of us to go through in our lives. I know many would say it shouldn’t have been a struggle for me and I should have seen her for who she was. Or I should’ve let her deal with the difficulty all by herself since she put herself in the situation and deserved whatever painful outcome awaited. But I shared her struggle and pain. When most men would never have went as far as to see or speak to her again, I never turned my back on her.
After that trip we stayed in communication, and the month following the trip she decided to terminate the pregnancy. I know this was difficult for her but as a man she said she loved, I don’t think I will ever quite understand why it was as much a struggle as she claimed it to be. With all I had been told about her wanting to be with me for the rest of her life and wanting to be the mother of my child one day, why would it be so difficult to “clear up” the situation she was in that could’ve killed any chances of our future? I never wanted to be insensitive to this matter and have read countless articles regarding the psychological impact of abortion on women, specifically of her religion and race. I always tried to be understanding. She expressed appreciation for me staying by her side and wanted to look forward to moving on and putting this situation behind us. I was all for it, though I was still quite bothered knowing she had been unfaithful. She knew that displeased me. She knew I had thought so much higher of her in prior stages of our relationship. But I never stopped loving her. I acknowledged the mistake, accepted the apology, and wanted to get stronger each day to where I’d be able to forgive her.
As the new year rang in, I wanted to be with her again. Knowing she wasn’t pregnant with another man’s seed made me very much in desire of reclaiming what I always felt was mine. We discussed availability and agreed on a date for me to come back. Then after a week of booking the trip, she tells me she might be forced to go out of town for work the day after I was scheduled to arrive, although she would do all she could to try and get out of making the trip. At this point I wasn’t sure if I was being lied to, or if the planning of this 2nd trip was all just bad timing. Something just didn’t seem valid with her telling me this, particularly when she began falling out of touch with me days later. I really was curious if she was going to make the trip for work or not, so I could reschedule or cancel what plans I had already made. Her inconsistent communication at this time started waving red flags at me again but I rode it out. Once she did get in touch with me regarding her work schedule and business trip, she stated she had to go and encouraged me to see about rescheduling the trip again for a few weeks later. I was able to easily do this, but around the time she was supposed to leave town for work, I didn’t hear from her at all. I really felt like I was being toyed with now. I felt I could atleast know if she made it to her destination safely, or if she went at all, right? I heard nothing. Looking back on it all now, I may have avoided doing this, but at the time I was curious about what was really going on, or where she really was. So I called her job, and low and behold, she was there and not out of town. It upset her that I went to this “extreme” by calling her place of employment but it upset me even more that my “girlfriend” couldn’t simply keep in touch with me regarding how she’s doing, how she’s feeling, where she is in the world, and things of that nature. Calling her job sparked up enough of a rise in her that she was definitely texting me now, but more so trying to make me feel bad for what I did. How can you make me feel bad for caring about you? If you don’t want me to care, I don’t have to but SAY THAT, not all this other stuff about wanting to be with me forever and loving me. It just seemed completely 180ish. In her text, she admitted she didn’t go out of town due to a family member being sick and needed to stay and help take care of them. She stressed over not being able to make the trip because she would have to make it up at another time. She also expressed how she had been reflecting on us, the abortion, and how she felt bad due to betraying me. Although she still loved me she just felt I needed more than what she had been giving up to this point. I completely agreed with that. I showed her more support and care than she would have expected in light of all that happened. But loving someone enough will make you do that I guess. A couple more days went by and she reached out apologizing for her lack of communication and stated she just needed some time. She told me not to worry if I came back to visit her because she would be available.
3 days leading up to my 2nd trip to see her, we weren’t communicating. At this point I’m just letting her breath but still finding it quite odd that she knows I coming back to see her and she can’t say anything to me. I tried understanding where her mind may have been (given everything she’s told me) so I could better deal with the fact I’m really making a trip for someone who is infrequently speaking to me. But to do that to someone you love is just lacking common decency in my opinion. Things may be depressing in your life at that moment, but how do you neglect a person you told to reschedule a visit to see you, then you’re out of touch up until they arrive? I never did anything like that to her or anyone else who I knew was coming to see me. The day of the 2nd flight out, I sent her a good morning text while at the gate and let her know I’d boarding the flight soon, and should be in town that night. I reach my first layover and turn my phone back on, curious to see if I’ve even received a reply. She did reply, however, she stated she forgot I was coming that day and she thought it was going to be the next day. This irritated me because I strive for clear communication when I talk to anyone. I try to be as concise as possible with the things I say so they don’t get misconstrued, or worse, forgotten about. But as with many things concerning her up until now, I sort of let this slide and knew she would atleast come spend the next few days with me while I was there. And again, we’re together. Everything is great. We love each other. We love our intimate moments and conversations. It’s like all the communication struggles and difficulties encountered when we’re apart don’t even exist anymore. It’s the weirdest and sort of reassuring feeling that things might be alright for us. We discussed our communication struggles and I was assured that she wasn’t ignoring me. She was dealing with a lot in regards to her emotional healing. It seemed believable. I always wanted her to let me aid in that healing process, not push me away. In talking with her about all this in person again, I brought myself to forgiving her. This was a big relief for me and I only hoped it would help her heal sooner and realize she had someone in her life who truly cared about her to the fullest extent.
After I went back home, our communication was great for a bit. She made mention of wanting to move to be with me if things didn’t work out for me to move to her city for the job I was pursuing. She stated how when we’re together nothing else matters and she really wanted to put our future plans with each other into action. That’s obviously easier said than done, but planning and putting forth effort is the first step. Weeks of positive and reassuring communication with each other took place up until a month after the 2nd trip, then she fell out of touch yet again. I gave this about a week then I reached out expressing how this inconsistent behavior was starting to take its toll and I needed to know where her heart truly was. I needed to know how sincere all her statements were about wanting a future or not. I guess it was more or less an ultimatum. One in which she replied to, stating she meant all she had told me regarding her feelings for me and what she wanted to have with me, but she felt she had lost all emotional strength she had been holding onto. She felt she was bringing me down by putting me through the different episodes of her being out of touch, but she just felt she needed time “alone” to get her mind right again and fully heal. She stated she wanted to be with me but she couldn’t in the state she was in. She needed time and would always love and respect me. I wasn’t sure I believed this fully. I felt I’d never really know what was sincere from her and what wasn’t. But I let it be. You can’t make someone stay involved in a situation they’re determined to break free from whether they really want to or not. Honestly, after being told this I had a feeling there was someone else in the picture who I knew nothing about. It just didn’t all register in my mind as she was explaining it. At the same time, you never really know how someone’s thoughts, struggles, and experiences may affect them. I just know I’ve been around the block several times to know if someone is running game on me or not. With her, I never wanted to believe that’s what it was but given what all we had been through, I couldn’t completely count out that possibility.
2 months after that 2nd trip and 1 month after our breakup, she texts me saying she’s in the hospital and found out she was 8 weeks pregnant, although she miscarried due to an enlarged uterus that couldn’t provide a livable housing facility for the fetus. This was a result of the her body slowly recovering from the abortion she had only 5 months prior. I was saddened for her and us. Although we had some differences to sort out in order to get our relationship back on track, I would have loved having her as the mother of my child. She expressed the same sentiments in a text the next day. But I have to admit, although I was with her those 8 weeks prior to her advising me of the pregnancy, something in my mind told me not to fully accept the idea that I was undoubtedly the father. Just looking at the communication struggle leading up to me coming back the 2nd time, and what we had been through before, who’s to say what (or who) she was doing before I got there? I hate thinking about that, and at this point there’s no need since this was over a year ago and didn’t materialize into anything. I’ve struggled with a lot of the things I’ve given thought to concerning me and this woman, as I’m sure you can tell from reading this.
Fast forwarding a year and some months later, we have not communicated much at all. I agreed to letting her have whatever time and space she felt she needed to heal, get her mind right, and determine what’s truly best for herself as an individual. I know the positive and loving impact I played in her life will never be forgotten and I would love having her in my my life again one day, given many needed personal changes for both of us. After breaking up, we maintained open outlets for communication through social networks we’re both on, although we don’t communicate on them anymore. But every time I post something on Snapchat, she looks at it. In fact, she hasn’t missed a single thing I’ve posted since she started following me. I can say the same for when she posts on there as well, for the most part. I look at the time it’s been since we split, and I know everyone has their own pace and speed in which they heal, make moves, reach back out, jump in new relationships or whatever. But I always felt like following her on social networks after breaking up could potentially set me up for disappointment if I see or hear something she posts that I may not like. Lately, the stuff I’ve seen her post looks like she has a new involvement. If this is true, I really can’t say how new it is seeing how I always had a feeling in the back of my mind that someone else was in the picture. However, it’s “almost” obvious there is someone else now, minus the fact she never shows him, but only records different venues she’s at where they are laughing or talking together. I know I’m completely overthinking this but seeing it really did upset me. I subliminally said something about it on Twitter (another social media outlet we follow each other on) and noticed she replied back indirectly and subliminally with a “Don’t worry about me, just do your thing” tweet. Then the very next day she blocked me on every social media outlet we once shared: Snapchat, Instagram (which I still look at, but haven’t posted on in over 2 years), Twitter, and Whatsapp. I mean it’s not like I was going to contact her about any of this, if it was really what I thought it was. We haven’t talked at all this year so far, so even if there was someone else what could I say? But surely you could understand how I’d be disappointed if this really was the case. Especially seeing how I’ve been told that “I am and always have been the one for her”. Maybe I was blocked because she felt I was onto something she wasn’t openly coming out with, or maybe I bring up too many bad memories, even with all the love I’ve shown her. The uncertainty never stops but I feel it’s one or the other.
Hello there!
Recently my boyfriend of 4 months broke up with me. We were eachothers first relationship and first in everything. We were really close and comfortable with eachother. He always would talk about how I was his first and only girl, how we would get married and have kids. But when he broke up with me he said he needed his space and he likes being alone. I admit i did get to the point where I would blow up his phone nonstop. But then he said he loves me but only as a friend and he doesn’t want to lose me. He said he wants a second chance but he feels like a loser for asking for one. So I gave him space problem is I’m friends with his family. I was invited the family party the day after he broke up with me, by him. So I went to the party when it came and he acted like I didn’t exist, he didn’t come greet me when I pulled up. He came and said hi how are you after almost half a hour of me being there. But it was like you would act with someone you don’t know. The rest of the party he was avoiding me but being in the same spots I was. When I left I said bye to him, he went in for a handshake but hugged me awkwardly instead. We barely had any contact after that, here and there I hope you’re well type thing. I usually messaged him. I know I shouldn’t have. But then he decided to text me on his lunch like he did all the time when we were together, but he quickly ended the conversation. I called him twice and I didn’t get a response from him, once I hung up mid call. Yesterday I asked him how his day was and he was talking to me about work so I thought he was gonna talk to me. I asked him a question about work but he never responded. That night I accidentally sent him a message meant for my cousin and quickly apologized for it. He said no worries have a good night. And this made me upset. I asked him why he talked to me like a stranger and I asked him if you don’t want anything to do with me or if you hate me just tell me. He said he didn’t hate me. I asked him why he was acting this way if he wanted to be friends and he said because I open up old wounds for him when he speaks to me. I asked him what did I do to hurt him, for him to tell me what I did, because when he broke up he said it was nothing I did. His response was “just stop I can’t talk about this” and then I told him he was mean. He didn’t respond to that. Then I decided to just unfollow him on all social media, but after I did that he blocked me on everything but he only unfriended me on snapchat so I can still see what he posts. He posted a video of him listening to a song that was basically our song. Did he do this on purpose?
Yes he did this on purpose and yes it is possible to get him back because he has continued to show interest indirectly. The fact that you are a family friend also helps.
I would still need more insights into the intricacies of your relationship, and also basic information like his age, because eI find his reaction to be a bit immature.
The best would be for you to book a coaching session in order for us to work together, and so that I could help you turn this things around the right way.
Sincerely hope to hear from you soon.
Regards,
Adrian
Hi,my boyfriend and I broke up in april ,since then we have been off and on quite a bit. Not even a week ago we slept in a hotel together and had an extremely passionate night..the next day he said he needed some time away from me..I know there is another girl he’s interested in,but he also told me he sees a future for us and he needed space..but now I’m blocked. On everything. Total complete block out. I’m afraid he is going to start pursuing this other girl and forget about me..I don’t want to give up but I feel helpless. What do I do? -rien
Hey Rien,
Thanks for sharing your story!
The best thing for you to do is to pull back and to give him the space that he needs. I know that your insecurities will make you doubt and want to chase, but trust me this is the worst thing you could do…you would only push him into the arms of that other girl.
You need to value yourself too and to make him realize that he could also lose you if he doesn’t get his act together quickly.
I would love to help you get him back, so don’t hesitate too book a coaching session in order for me to advise you at length…
Wishing you all the very best either way.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Thanks for sharing your story but this is simply way too long.
I urge you to book a coaching session in order for us to work together and so that I can provide you with the follow up and advice that you deserve.
Best,
Adrian
Me and my ex broke up a couple weeks ago. Two days later she was dating someone else. I gave her some time that she requested then a week later I got in contact with her. We decide to be just friends… It was going great.. I went to her dance recital a couple days later and she texted me during the performance saying she “wanted to see me” I said I wanted to see her too. After that I went to her house and we ate and hung out. Before I left I hugged her and asked if sh missed me and she said a little bit then we kissed. The next day I invited her over we we’re like dating again.. We had sex and we made out etc. That night before she left she said she loved me then hurried up and said “no no no I didn’t mean that” I was venting to someone that night they went and told there lover at the time. She flipped and said she was done for good.. She blocked me on everything and I don’t know what to do….
Hey Cody,
I’m not sure I understood the end, but I gather that a mutual friend told her something you must have said…what did you mean by venting? how long were you guys together?
Thanks,
Adrian
We we’re together for 3 months but we known each other for 6 years. Venting in as talking to someone to give me advice.
Yep, you can get her back! Give her space in the next 10 days and don’t try to justify what you did…Book a coaching session in order for us to go over a detailed game plan and so that I can answer all of your questions!
Looking forward to helping you get her back.
Sincerely,
Adrian
She is dating someone else.. That she says she really loves
We we’re together for 3 months but know each other for 6 years. venting in as telling someone what happened and getting advice.
Hi, I need advice here .
My ex , always plays the no contact rule with me . But this time I didn’t beg him or anything . He didn’t block me either on Facebook, but a month later after the break up he did , he also blocked my friend . But a few days after he block me he texted to my phone saying the reason why he left and that he said he warned me and I never stop so that’s why he’s going to disappear and he said bye . But 2 days ago was going to be our anniversary and I decided to see if he unblock me and my friend and he actually did unblock me but I look on it 2 days ago , we been broken up for 1 month and 2 weeks now about .
The last time we broke up I didn’t beg either he just told me if I want my things for his house so I went to pick it up and I forgave him , so we got back together.
What is he trying to do this time ? I don’t understand him ? am very sad . we been together for 3 years and he’s 19 years old
Hey Daisy,
I think that you are approaching this the right way. I understand that you have many questions and the best would probably be for us to speak via phone or skype in order for me to provide you with some guidance and to help you get back with this man…
It’s still possible!
Best,
Adrian
Am sorry this is Daisy , I couldn’t seem away to Edit the question . What I needed to tell you was we don’t have each other as friends on Facebook. We never were before and after the blocking .
It means he wanted to see what’s been going on!
My boyfriend posted some sexual reaction to a female friend. I told him I didn’t like it. He told me that I didn’t get the punchline and that he was just trying to have a personality and to get likes. And in the heat of the moment I said to unfriended me. And before I knew it he did not only befriend me he blocked me too. And we live in 2 different countries. He blocked me on Facebook and whatsapp. And those are the only 2 ways we can communicate. And now a man gave me a compliment and told me if he wasn’t interested in me anymore that I could call him. And just yesterday when I asked a friend if I could look through her profile to his, there was a quote posted by a friend of his. The quote said:” fight for your girl as if another man is working 24 hours a day to get her from you”. His reaction was:” not me! She wants someone else and I am not going to waste her time or mine”. This man isn’t anything but a friend. What can I do. Because he truly is the love of my life. Can you help me greetings Mary
Hey Mary,
I would love to help but will need to know more about your relationship…how long you’ve been together and how long you’ve been doing long distance for instance. The best is always to communicate live during a phone coaching session in order to get proper guidance and support and to answer all of your questions.
Don’t hesitate to book a coaching session!
Best,
Adrian
hello my name is maria i was in a relationship with my boyfriend for 10 months .I am very insecure woman financially and i have big problems with one of my daughter she is 23 she is pregnant no place to stay so she moved in with me me and her we cant communicate at all .One day i told him is better for him to leave because this is not going to work out so he did .The same day i was begging and crying for him to come back he blocked me from everywhere only communication was email. Few days ago he told me to stop emailing him and this is harassment and he is getting a restraining order .So i stop but i can not stop crying i want him back . Is that possible? he is 46 and i am 45
Hey Maria,
I feel for you and understand that you must be going through a lot of stress. However you need to stop putting this man on a pedestal; and stop chasing him because you will only make things worse.
Reach out to me through the contact section of my website, let’s see how we can turn this around!
Sincerely,
Adrian
My boyfriend posted some sexual reaction to a female friend. I told him I didn’t like it. He told me that I didn’t get the punchline and that he was just trying to have a personality and to get likes. And in the heat of the moment I said to unfriended me. And before I knew it he did not only befriend me he blocked me too. And we live in 2 different countries. He blocked me on Facebook and whatsapp. And those are the only 2 ways we can communicate. And now a man gave me a compliment and told me if he wasn’t interested in me anymore that I could call him. And just yesterday when I asked a friend if I could look through her profile to his, there was a quote posted by a friend of his. The quote said:” fight for your girl as if another man is working 24 hours a day to get her from you”. His reaction was:” not me! She wants someone else and I am not going to waste her time or mine”. This man isn’t anything but a friend. What can I do. Because he truly is the love of my life. Can you help me greetings Mary
I replied to you below!
Best,
Adrian
My ex blocked me on everything last night.. He broke up with me on Memorial Day but we had been talking and hanging out and working on things, we’d both agreed we were going to work on our issues. Everything was going well until last Wednesday we got in a huge fight and he said he needed space until Monday. So I was freaking out and called him last night from my friends phone, he then proceeded to tell me he was done, and then we got in a huge texting fight later that night and he was saying this was all my fault that I was the one that ruined everything, that I was abusive and all his friends and family agree (I wasn’t and all his friends and family were liking my stuff on Facebook and his mom even told me she loved me last night so I don’t think it’s true that they agreed with him about that) he was fuming and kept bringing up stuff i had done in the past.. And then all of a sudden he stopped responding.. I don’t know what to do. And he just called my sister this morning, I’m not sure what they’ve said yet but I’ll add that later
Hey,
I think you simply need to take a step back and let the passions cool down before you make a big mistake. Then you’ll need a plan to really turn this thing around, I am really confident that I can help you get back together so please book a coaching session if you are serious about doing everything possible to make this work.
Sincerely,
Adrian
HI
For the last 3 weeks I’ve been doing the no contact rule and have had zero contact with my ex.
I now find I’ve been blocked from her Facebook witch confuses me !
Should I continue with the no contact ?
Hey Bob,
Sorry it took so long to get back to you, I’ve been overwhelmed with coaching requests.
I need to know more about you and your love story as well as how the breakup happened in order to tell you how to proceed. Please provide me with more info or book a private coaching session in order for us to work together and turn this around.
Best,
Adrian
Dear Sir,
Good day! I just want to share my story and ask for advice. My ex broke up with me because he said he it hurts him seeing me throwing tantrums because he can’t marry me, before the breakup we have been discussing already this matter. He said he is not prepared financially. I guess he comes to his limits. He said he wants to end the relationship just a week ago then the following day he deleted me on Facebook and blocked the messaging but not on the Facebook then my initial response was to send a lot of message on whatsapp. He had seen it but does not reply, i continued sending message everyday the usual way not really flooding message. until yesterday he the blocked me on whatsapp. I was still able to see his post on instagram his last post was about a quote “I suffered, I learned, I changed” what should I do? Its just a week since we broke up. And we are on ldr. No third parties concern too.
Hoping for your kind advice.
Thank you
Hey Anna,
Apologies it took so long to get back to you, I’ve been very busy with tons of requests for private sessions.
You need to stop reaching out and to focus on you in order to not make things worse! Most mistakes are actually made after the breakup and you clearly are only making things more complicated.
Even though you are in a long distance relationship and blocked on WhatsApp and FB, i sincerely believe that I can help you turn it all around.
Book a coaching session in order for us to get started on getting you guys back together.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi Adrian,
This is part of my story : I’ve been on a ldr for the last 2 years. My ex boyfriend I met in middle school and found each other again after many, many years. Our ldr was excellent! we talked on the phone everyday in the mornings and evenings and leave the weekends for ourselves and our kids with just a little text here and there. We tried to meet in person every four months and we traveled together and had plans for the future. Things started to change when I started feeling needy and jealous in the last three months. During that time I was and I am still dealing with a lot of stuff. Moving back to my country, where he lives, quitting a job, making plans, going to school, health issues, etc.. He has also been under a lot of stress financially , so I’ve helped him a little on that regards. I know I couldn’t handle things in a positive way and he got tired of dealing with my neediness and insecurities. Deep in me I was sure that there was no reason for me to be jealous, but oh well! I reacted and screwed everything. About one month and a half ago he ended the relationship, but left the door opened so I could show him that I was going to take care of my issues. During those first three weeks we continue having communication through IM and Facebook messenger, but I think I let myself go more insecure because I really didn’t know what to do, or what was he excepting from me. So, I continued with my neediness and questioning him about really silly things. So, about 2 weeks ago during one of my questionings, he said goodbye and blocked me from his phone IM, and also unfriend me on Facebook..That same day I sent him a message saying that if that’s what he wanted I would respect and that I thought he really didn’t even love me ( of course I know he loves me). After that last message on June 6, I messaged him only on Father’s day wishing him a nice day. He messaged me back thanking me for the wishes and sending regards to my father. I messaged him back saying ” thank you” but he didn’t reply, Then two days after, I sent him a little video of how to open a bottle of wine using a key, but he also hasn’t replied. The messages show as “delivered” though. I know for sure that we had pretty good things together, we share a lot of things that we both like and have a lot of respect for each other. I know feelings were /are strong, but he is avery determined man, so I don’t know where I’m standing right now. I hope you can give me some advise here, I’d really appreciate any help. Thank you!
Hey Zis,
Thanks for reaching out and sharing your story. Sorry for the delay in getting back to you!
As I’ve just told you via email, the best possible support that I could provide you would be through a one on one coaching session via phone or skype. It would enable me to provide you with a tailored game plan, to answer all of your questions to provide you with tips and tools to make your ex miss you.
If you are really committed to doing what it takes to get back together this is the way to go.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi,
My girlfriend of 5 years broke up with me back in Jan 2016 just after new years. She told me she no longer felt the spark we once had and couldnt be in a relationship that she wasnt happy in, which is understandable as I had been very complacent for the last months before the break up. I wasnt being the man that she deserved. For me the break up came out of nowhere as she ended it just as I was about to take her brother to airport. Because this girl meant so much to me and I was in shock I couldnt/refused to accept the breakup….I was so broken that I made the big mistakes of begging/pleading/promising I would change etc for the last 5/6 months basically I was over pursuing her and not leaving her alone. As you guessed she got very annoyed at this and has now blocked me on facebook/snapchat but not on whatapp and still has my number. I still love her to bits and really hate myself for what I have put her through as you don’t act like that to someone you care alot about. to be honest since finding out I was blocked on facebook, I am kind of glad as it means I know longer see what she is up to and I can now spend time sorting myself out and getting back to myself again. I have never acted like this before on other relatonships I truly love this girl for the person she is and the break up hurt me more than I expected, I lost my best friend….I feel I have lost all chances with this girl but I am asking if you have any expert advice for me that may help save me and have any chance of getting her back??
Hey John,
Thanks for sharing your story.
You are already on the right track since you’ve shifted gears and now focused on your personal growth and evolution. You won’t be able to convince her to give you a second chance through words at this stage…targeted actions repeated over time is the way to prove to her that you can make her happy (even if you are not on talking terms at the moment). First you need to get back to your true self, find some inner peace and happiness and only then will you be in a position to win her back; not the other way around! It would be a mistake to approach it the other way around and to think that you can only be happy once you are back together.
If you need support along the way or a game plan to get back with her quickly, please book a private coaching session with me – I would love to help!
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hey Adrian,
Okay, my situation is kind of complicated. I’m sure you’ve heard something similar but to me it feels like I’m in the worst possible mess I can be in.
I really wanted to sign up for your personal coaching classes but I’m still a university student and I really don’t have the finances at the moment. I’ve always been a honest person though, so if you can help me out someday when I do have the money or hell I’ll even save up to sign up even if I don’t need it anymore.
Basically let me give you an overview of my situation. Me and my ex had an amazing relationship, we wanted to marry each other. We’re both 22 now and we had it great. The only real issue was that we were in two different countries. I study abroad and so does she. We finally had the opportunity to meet in July and she spent basically every day at my house, she knows my family, I know hers. We had everything. When we had to do long distance after that though, we were supposed to meet in December but by around October I made a mistake. I wanted to stop spending time with all my friends and give her more time, she never asked me for it but I felt it was my responsibility to do so. I wanted to do it for her and give myself more time to study and work on my goals. I did do that but it was too fast, I ended up getting depressed around November and I ignored her a lot, didn’t make her feel special anymore.
By December we were supposed to meet and I’m sure it would have all worked out if we could but by a very cruel twist of fate I had a visa issue and I couldn’t go back home to meet her. This just made me sink in my depression and I ignored her a lot more. Finally around February I went on a trip to meet my family and friends in the United States in an attempt to get out of this depression but while I was there I missed Valentine’s day when she wanted me to make it special for her and I wanted to order something for her, but honestly I was consumed in depression and I ended up not being able to order something for her due to my sisters card not being available. I didn’t even realize this until around a month ago. She wanted to break up with me the next morning and that hurt me because I felt like I was trying to get out of this depression to be better for her and she just wanted to leave. I foolishly readily agreed. After that she told me we can get back together when we’re back home in 6 months and that we can talk to each other whenever we feel like it and I agreed to that as well. However when she tried to speak to me, I told her I didn’t want to and I kept saying things that would hurt her. I was immature in the past, I didn’t consider her feelings and how she felt. When I finished my holiday after a month, I was going back home and I read this little note that she had left for me in my wallet. That’s when it all kicked in. I wanted to fight this depression, I wanted to be the great guy that she fell in love with again. I’ve always been the type of person that learns from my mistakes and never repeats them. Whether in relationships or otherwise. This was my experience.
From that moment on I tried to apologize to her over and over again, but she said that she doesn’t want to speak to me right now and she has to concentrate on her studies. She was doing her masters during that time. This was around March and her finals were in June. She’s also the kind of girl that takes her studies very seriously. I kept trying to message her and my sister told me that if you want a girl back, you have to tell her everything you feel and keep her involved in your life. I messaged her about everything that I was doing every day for like 3 weeks. Finally one day in April, I sent her a message that really was pretty angry and she blocked me on whatsapp after that but I still couldn’t see clearly. I tried to message her on facebook for around 5 days and then she blocked me on that. I tried to call her numerous times during this time. I tried emailing her a lot as well. All about my feelings, how sorry I was and how much I wanted her back. All through this time she didn’t say a single thing to me. I had no idea what was going on in her head. Eventually, I sent her a message that accused her of something she didn’t do around May, then she replied to me and told me we’re done. She said she has nothing to gain from speaking to me and I’m very selfish. The only thing she wants from me is for her to respect her privacy. After that I didn’t message her for quite a while, around 2 weeks but afterwards I saw her new whatsapp picture with another guy and that angered me. I sent her an email saying that I didn’t want anything to do with her anymore and she actually reacted to that. She told my best friend she wanted to be friends with me and liked a picture of me on my cousins Instagram. She also said she just went for the opera with a friend and that she wasn’t dating the guy in the picture. However I messed up because two weeks later I sent her another email saying that I still love her.
After that she told my friend she didn’t even want to be friends anymore and she wasn’t interested in me anymore. Her birthday came two weeks after that and there were some stuff that I sent about month before this, however I told her to throw it and I didn’t feel that way anymore but again as usual I emailed her a few more times after that saying I did love her. Now I’ve sent her another email around 15 days ago explaining why I acted the way I did and that I’m sorry for how I acted. That I don’t want forgiveness or for her to speak to me but that she should find out how I’ve changed if she wants to.
I’ve poured my heart out into writing this to you, there’s obviously more but I think this is the most summarized version I can give. Basically I know I fucked up, I made mistake after mistake and the block and loss of feelings was gradual over multiple platforms. I didn’t respect her feelings or her decisions. I was extremely selfish and I have pushed her far further from me than necessary. As you can see by the length of this email, I’ve typed a few like this and at this point she thinks I’m crazy and I need help however I know I’m not. I just fought for this like I’ve never done for anything before because I know how well we had it and it was my fault. I know my chances of starting over in this relationship are slim to none. However, this girl was the one for me, she’s a wonderful human being and she was an amazing girlfriend. I took her for granted and I don’t want to do that ever again. I have changed myself a lot in this process and right now I’m getting out of the depression very well. I’ve been spending more time with friends again and regaining my old personality back. She’s a very beautiful girl and I’m sure there are a lot of guys that are trying to fill the void I’ve left. I’m also quite attractive and at this point I could probably have quite a few girls if I wanted to since my old personality is back but I know I would like nothing more than to have an opportunity to start over with her. I’ve gone on two dates though to get better and I know the mistakes I’ve made and how to not do them anymore, I’ve learnt my lesson and paid for it heavily.
I know this seems like an impossible situation and even I don’t disagree with this but if you can somehow help me recover this relationship. I will forever be indebted to you because I’m sure this is the girl I would like to spend my life with, I’ve had a long time to think about this and it doesn’t just come from emotions.
My only question is: What do I do now and do I even have a chance?
I think I’m fully blocked except for her email which she has not blocked me from I think. We were together for around 6 months and now it has been about 4 months since we broke up. She also seems to think every action I take is something related to getting her back and she doesn’t seem to be interested in me anymore. I haven’t contacted her for around the last 3 weeks as well.
Thank you very much for reading this, I’m sorry if I have written way too much and I really appreciate this
Hey Tom, thanks for sharing your story. Sorry it took a week to get back to you, I was organizing an event in France. Reach out to me via the contact tab of my website, and we’ll see what can be done. Best, Adrian
Hey Adrian!
Reading over your article has helped me understand my situation better but a little advice could help if you have the time. So I am somewhat of a celebrity and have many fans, because of this it is very hard for me to find someone who is truly into me for me and not just the perks that come along with being in the public eye. I met a girl who was a fan of mine and just like many of the others she just went crazy for me, I kept talking to her because I thought she was kinda cool and over time I started to feel like she truly liked me for me and not just for the fame. Something unfortunate happened tho, because i’m in the public eye people started harassing her. They even found out where she lived and her phone number, they called her house and started to give her threats. I told her that can happen when you are with someone like me and we should keep things more secret until we are official. I didn’t want to jump the gun and go into a relationship unless i knew 100% she was the one for me, and that when the time came I could go over ways for her to protect herself from harassment. She has anxiety and the idea of people doing that to her again took a massive mental toll on her that I didn’t really see.
Something small, a rumor that someone might have been talking trash about her really set her off and she started crying saying things like “I’m a bad person!” “I’m not good for you!” “You are better off without me!” I wanted to talk to her about everything and make it clear that I can protect her against all of these things but she wouldn’t have it and just left without another word. She then sent me a text saying “I just need a break, we aren’t over forever and we will cross paths again some day!”. This made me very confused because she had blocked me on everything! The only way I could contact her was through her phone, that she told me to remove the number to. I kept the number and just didn’t text her for a few days to give her time to get over things. I sent a text “hey is everything alright? I want to talk to you.” but she didn’t reply, so i tried again, and again and again. I started obsessing over it because I knew I was good for her and she would have been very happy with me. I finally got her to call me and tell me what was going on, she told me she didn’t have feelings for me anymore and that she had moved on and found someone else. In my head I was thinking “How could you say you love me a week ago and then now feel nothing for me?! And move on that fast!?” I accepted it and said I was happy for her just a little upset she never told me. She apologised and said “we can still be friends!” I thought that was a little hurtful but whatever I guess i’ll take it.
I sent her a text the next morning as a joke to try and get over things and move on “Hey remember that cute friend of yours? You should hook me up!” it was a joke and I said after the fact that I didn’t mean it and was just trying to be funny. Her boyfriend then got involved, started sending me pictures of them kissing and bragging that he had her and I didn’t. Then suddenly I was blocked again on everything! I was pretty hurt and I ended up saying “ok i’m done we aren’t friends anymore!” she was mad back and said “fine!”. I went too far and sent my last text “I hate you!” I felt bad soon after and apologised but said “we shouldn’t speak again i’m blocking you!”. She has me blocked on everything except for a mutual friend that I was able to send a message through saying “I’m sorry for everything and I the way I acted, I wanted to fix things between us and make them okay again but you never gave me the chance. We both hurt each other and that sucks but looking back I think we can forgive each other and move on. I’m happy for you that you found someone else and I wish you luck in your future! Good bye forever”
I’m still blocked on everything, I care about her deeply and I know for a fact her life would be way better with myself. I feel like I was too needy towards the end of the relationship up until the break up and that I should have seen the clear signs that she wanted me to change because she really liked me. I feel like the guy she’s with is just a rebound to make herself feel better but that she actually wanted me. I’ve made a point not to make contact with her anymore and give her the time and space she needs, working on bettering myself and living life to the fullest by becoming more successful and turning into the guy she always wanted. I still have feelings for her and want her to come back but i’m learning to move past that now. Any advice on this and if you think there might be a chance of getting her back?
Hello Sam,
I feel in today’s social media obsessed world that is where everything happens, people break up in a text, they broadcast they are in relationships all over Facebook, and block their exes, I wonder if they don’t want the ex to see that they down graded from you! Lol. I’m going through the same thing that you are and I honestly feel that the dumper “ghosting” the dumpee is one of the cruelest, most evil, cowardly and most childish ways to handle a break up! For most people it is easier for them to just ignore you and not have to deal with your pain, especially if you come across needy and desperate right after the break up. If you could do everything all over again with this girl would you? I can honestly say me ex, that I was with for 6 years, I would NOT do it all over again! There were red flags from the first week we were together but I just thought he was the best thing since sliced bread! About the 3rd month in he told me, “at the end of the day you’re just another girl”!! I was crushed and should have ran for the hills! I’m assuming you’re young and since you said you are somewhat of a celebrity it’s hard to find a girl interested in you and not your fame, sorry to say but that is one price you pay for being famous! If this girl ran into another mans arms so easily she’s not worth your time or energy, she will do it again when something happens she doesn’t like! My ex broke up with me then 2 weeks later blocked me on Facebook , a friend of mine looks at his profile sure enough he has a photo of him and his new girlfriend, posting he’s in a relationship! Can anyone say rebound?! I don’t care who you are you can not know anything about a person in two weeks and claim your in a relationship! Just keep the no contact up, that’s what I’m doing, and look for someone with a little class, that isn’t going to run at the first difficult situation! Keep smiling!
Hey Kelley, thanks for the feedback…keep fighting the good fight!
Best,
Adrian
Hey Sam,
Thanks for sharing your story and apologies that it took a few days to get back to you, I was hosting a big conference in Paris, France that just ended today. You are right, the other guy is just a rebound. It is extremely hard to jump from one moving to train to the next, and so I believe that their relationship won’t last very long. You are also right that you became way too needy at the end of the relationship. If you that famous, she fell in love with a celebrity and probably put you on a pedestal from the start (hence why she kept saying that she wasn’t good enough for you), but after the mystique collapsed and you became someone else than the person that she originally fell for. Based on your status and love story, I absolutely feel that it is still possible for you to win her back if you have a tailored game plan. But you’ll need to be motivated and to keep your emotions in check. Don’t hesitate to reach out and to book a private coaching session with me in order for us to turn this around quickly.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi Adrian!
The guy I had been dating for a month stopped replying to me suddenly and then blocked me on all social media and I’m not sure why. Our last conversation was 2 weeks ago. The day before he confirmed that he liked me and that he was excited to see where things went and during our last conversation he said he would love to hang out with me that day and would let me know when he was free but he didn’t. He did invite me to a party at his house the next day though. After this 2 full days passed without us talking which was strange for us so the next night I asked if something was wrong and he didn’t respond to me. 2 days after that I sent him a snapchat that he never opened, but he watched my snapchat story the next day so I texted him again asking if he could let me know what happened. Instead of responding he blocked me on snapchat. That night I was out with friends and ended up drunk texting him unfortunately. After this he blocked me on instagram and facebook, 2 sites that we had never talked on and I believe he blocked my number as well but I’m not sure. When I found this out I sent him one last text almost a week ago. What reasons could he have for ignoring me suddenly when we had never had a fight and he had talked a lot about seeing me more? And why would he go through the trouble of blocking me on sites we weren’t friends on? I would really like to see him more but know I can’t initiate contact anymore. Thanks for your help!
Hello Sarah,
Thanks for sharing your story. You are dealing with a man who was putting up a façade and who clearly wasn’t who you thought he was. Either he was in another relationship prior to meeting you and finally decided to cut you out, or he is simply a narcissist who didn’t have the courage to tell you straight up that he no longer wanted to be with you. Unless there are other elements that you haven’t shared with me I believe that he is a liar or coward. That said if you still want to be with him it can still be possible with the right game plan and follow up. The first step would be to stop reaching out to him all together and to see this process as a medium term endeavor. You simply can’t continue to try to pursue him in any way at this point.
I would love to know more, and give you more insights as well as provide you with tailored game plan so don’t hesitate to book a coaching session with me if you feel like you need extra support.
Sincerely,
Adrian
He block me after I said nasty things to him. But I really did because he said he likes to be alone and our things where getting to a level were he does not normally go.
Hey Maria,
Take a step back and stop reaching out to him….he most probably will come back to you first. That way you can regain some control over the power struggle.
Reach out to me and book a coaching session if you need more help.
Best,
Adrian
I dated my ex for 3 years, a year and a half of which we were engaged. I started school in a different city 3 hrs away. We made the distance work for the most part but things started to change. When I confronted him about it he told me it was all in my head and that relationships change over time and that it was natural. I couldn’t help but feel like he just wasn’t that interested in me anymore. I felt as though he was just trying to check off the marriage box and that it really had very little to do with him being in love with me. I expressed that I felt as though I would be replaceable to him, that it hurt my feelings that he no longer did the sweet things he used to. We started fighting a lot. He became jealous any time I would go anywhere without him. He told people it was because I said I didn’t love him anymore. During our relationship he insisted that everything was in my head and that if He didn’t want to be with me he wouldn’t have proposed. To keep a long story short we broke up about 3.5 months ago. He was in a relationship 2 weeks later with someone with a small child. He was dating her for almost a month before I even found out because he blocked me on social media. Because I was away at school at had to wait until I could go home to get my things from his house. Come to find out there were pictures of him and this girl (and baby) with my stuff in the background…. which is personally think is incredibly weird even if you’re over someone.
We lived together so there was a lot of stuff. When we broke things off he told me he would pack everything and I could get it when I had time. He went back and forth between telling me he needed it out ASAP to saying I could get it when I had the time. He was adamant that he didn’t want to see me. Which again I find weird if you’re over our relationship.
Come to find out all he packed were my clothes and personal belongings. He had taken the pictures of us out of my picture frames and replaced them with pictures of his family and friends and hung them back up. He didn’t pack any of my other decorations and said it was because he didn’t know what I wanted (again weird… even if I didn’t want it why would you?) After several days of going back and forth about the remainder of my stuff he finally dropped some of it off at my parents house. There were still several items that I requested that he still didn’t bring back. We corresponded a little and at this point I was back at school. During all of this I called him several times (sometimes rather late at night- i.e. 3am) and he always answered pretty quickly and most of the conversations were pretty lengthy. I texted him once pretty early asking him to call when he had a chance and he called right away. I expressed to him that I was sad about our breakup and that I didn’t understand how he could cut me out of his life the way he had. He told me he “doesn’t stay friends with exes”. He told me if we ever got back together it wouldn’t be because him and his current girlfriend broke up but when I brought that conversation up later he told me he never said it. The communication went on for a month or so until he finally dropped that remainder of my stuff at my parents. I told him if it were a problem that I could come get the rest of it when I was home but he always said he didn’t want the next time he saw me to be when I was coming to get my stuff. Through this process I figure out he was blocking my phone number while he was not at work and unblocking it when he was. When I called him out on it he denied it at first. After pressing he said it was because he didn’t want to upset his new girlfriend but he wanted me to be able to contact him about my belongings. What I don’t understand is why he would’t just explain that to his new girlfriend and if that was a problem why he still hadn’t returned my stuff which would avoiding the need for contact all together. And if that was the case why not just say that when I asked about it instead of trying to deny it?
What was so confusing to me was why he wouldn’t just return my stuff. Through the process we were relatively nice to each other. I e-mailed him about a month ago regarding something I’d forgotten to ask for, I included something off topic and friendly just to keep things light and his response had an undertone of annoyance. I have made little effort to contact him since our split because he made it clear he didn’t want me to and has gone out of his way to cut me out of his life.
What I had the hardest time understanding is how after 3 years and an engagement he could be so cold to me, especially if he’s genuinely happy with someone else. I have been told by several people that the 2 of the are constantly posting all over social media and started telling each other they loved each other about a month in. He’s even paying some of her bills and is essentially acting like a father to her child. He also started hosting parties at his house pretty regularly… something he never did when we were together and not because I cared.
To add another layer to an already complicated story I found out he has been logging into my Facebook account on a pretty regular basis since we broke up. I think that was the most confusing part to me. He is obviously not posting to make me jealous because I cannot see anything he posts but why sign into my account if you so desperately want nothing to do with me? He has made no effort to contact me, just logs into my Facebook. He also e-mailed himself my passwords to my other accounts.
I also can’t see how you could rebound with someone with a child, at least not intentionally…. at what point is it too serious to come back from if it is a rebound? I don’t know how you go from planning a wedding with someone (date and all) to being in a very serious relationship with someone else in a matter of months, with someone who couldn’t be more opposite than me. I know his family thinks he’s moving too quickly.
I am still really struggling with all of it which makes me feel silly. I guess my question is… Do you think this is a rebound or should I brace myself to a relatively quick engagement.
Should I try to contact him via e-mail?
Hey Katharine,
This is clearly a rebound relationship and your ex still loves you despite what he may be saying. His behavior is that of a man who isn’t ready to let go, one that wants and needs to maintain control.
I think that I can help you win him back!
Book a coaching session with me in order for us to get started ASAP.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hello Adrian!
I’m khadijah my ex boyfriend broke up with me few months ago and that time I was staying with him day and night. And the last day of the week that he was leaving out of town I called him to make sure he made it down there okay. Then few days later I get this and he says sorry to say I’m with someone else when all a long he was because he kept asking me if I was dating anyone or talking someone. And now I realized he blocked me and my mom from Facebook it said cannot not connect page or something like that. And then he thought I should of been happy for me as friend when I was heartbroken about it. But this article really helped me. And ever since this happen I said some crazy things to me because I was emotionally at the time and he just don’t see what he’s doing to me but to himself. Making me feel like I’m making him the bad guy.
Hey Khadijah,
Thank you for sharing your story!
I want to help you win him back. You have to control your emotions and not chase him. The more you show how angry you are and the more you will empower him. The best is for you to start by going with a radio silence of 30 days.
You can learn more about it here: https://www.withmyexagain.com/guides/no-contact-rule/
In the mean time focus on you and your overall well being. You need to regain some inner peace and a sense of emotional independence in order to be in a prime position to win him back. The truth is that you don’t need him to be happy, you can be happy on your own, he is just the cherry on top.
Reach out to me and book a coaching session if you feel that you need more help and support.
I wish you all the very best either way.
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
Hi Adrian,
What you describe in an article may be true for a western man. My ex is Indian. He sincerely hated me changing profile pics and posting anything on facebook ( reason: by doing so I seek appreciation from others rather than from within myself). Esp. If I do so during our fights. I tended to change the pics on facebook as revenge during some of the fights. This led to even more condemnation from his side. What behaviour would be your advice for such a situation? Right now I am blocked everywhere but I know he will check up on me at some point.
Hey, please reach out to me and book a coaching session in order for us to explore at length. It would take more that a reply here to guide you properly.
Best,
Adrian
Hi Adrian,
Was with my parner for 1.5 years, and the last few months of the relo we were living together. We argued a fair bit which put a strain on the relationship and after an argument he called it quits and moved out. We have been apart for 6 months, and in this 6 months we havent really gone longer than a week without speaking to each other. It is always me to initiate, never him though. We have seen each other a few times, but not for the right reasons…….more for the physical side of things. I want to rebuild our relationship, but I could never bring this up with him as he would think im crazy. We spoke just the other day and organised to see each other, and then he went cold again and ignored me for 2 days, so I did the silly thning of sending messages and calling, which resulted in him blocking me, and he has since said that he needs space and to let it be. Only a few nights before this i declined his offer to come over, which resulted in him going into crazy mode asking who i was with etc etc !!! Please provide some advise, as i am honestly so so lost.
Thank you so much 🙂
Hey Jessie,
The fact that he is so possessive is a very good sign.
If you start putting the right action in place we could win him back.
Reach out to me and book a coaching so we can work together to turn this around.
Best,
Adrian
I had to travel and a week before I left we had a misunderstanding and I left before we settled everything down. After some days I realized that it was my fault and that I truly hurt him. I called him so I can ask him to forgive me. Then at that time he told me that he doesn;t have enough time to talk. So I told him to call me back when he is has time. He never did so. After a week I called him and then he told me that He has been thinking and now he thinks that it’s better we stay friends than couple. I begged him for forgiveness then he said that he forgave me. My heart was released and for 3 days everything was alright till the time I wrote him on whatsapp and found out that he blocked me. Next day I texted him on facebook asking him to be sincere with me and tell me if he really has forgiven me. Then I just could see that he read the message but never replied. Aday after I wrote him another and apparently he didn’t see it and because he unfriended me on facebook I do;t even now if it reached him. After I sent him an email asking him why he is avoiding me but he never replied. I was thinkking of calling him today. I don’t know if I should still continue or just give up on him because it’s over. WHAT I don’t understand is the reason why he said that he has forgiven me , talk with him normally then after 2 days he blocked me everywhere. What should I do?
Hey,
Sorry for the delay in getting back to you, I’ve been overwhelmed with phone coaching requests that I must prioritize.
I am afraid that you may be making more and more mistakes and thus pushing him away for good.
Please book a session in order for me to advise you in the best possible way.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
Adrian
My ex said he never wanted to talk to me again and that’s when I lashed out at him saying “go fuck yourself” and that’s it After that statement he blocked me on everything social media . Those words hurt especially when we had chemistry with one another. he moved down to Florida with his family for the summer, but he’ll be back in Boston when college starts up again. I live in Long Island however. It’s been two months maybe more but I’m still torn about it. Im hoping he comes back into my life. I’ve tried to get my mind off it whether it’s with hanging with friends, dating other people, or playing my sport, but at night he appears in my dreams or late night thinking. I really want this to work out but idk what to do but I do want him back. I did SOmething stupid and made my friend follow him on Instagram but he liked the pictures I commented on then after a day or two after that he ended up blocking her… Honestly I’ve been to psychics and I’ve been getting mixed messages from everyone whether he is or isn’t going to contact me… Lol I was desperate because I still am INLOVE with the guy. Please help. I did what you said and kept my profile open and posted happy pics.
Hey Dana,
Stop making more and more mistakes otherwise you will push him away for good.
Invest your money wisely, reach out to me…book a coaching session and let me invest myself fully in what you are going through in order to provide lasting solutions.
Hope to speak with you soon during a phone coaching session.
Sincerely,
Adrian
My ex and I have disconnected on Social media – we are no longer friends on FB and have stopped following each other on Instagram & Twitter. However, her mum and best friends are still friends with me. I guess this is just to see what I’m doing.
The main problem I have is that although I’ll be 3 weeks in to NC tomorrow I don’t know how to re-open dialogue with her. She’s moved back in with her parents (we are 36 and 32) and they are very protective of her.
Hey Jonathon,
Reach out to me and let me help you rebuild contact the right way.
Even if you are blocked she is clearly checking your profile through her mom’s account, you can still send targeted messages to her!
Hope to work with you soon,
Adrian
I started seeing this girl couple months ago we fell for either hard and fast.. we both have had rough pasts and didnt beleive in love. But yet we fell in love. When we first started seeing either she told me how she wanted to go traveling for a long time in sept. We wanted to push either away. But couldnt said lets just go with the flow. Over time it developed to love. So i thought.. we were inseprable. Always together just having fun. Sometimes she would try to run cuz she was scared of feelings. But id tell her i was there and shed come back.. 2 months before she leaving she decided to end things and said it be best to get this over with now or kt will be so hard. She didnt wabt to have a bf before she left cuz she said she will miss me to much and want to come home. But she loved me deerley and still wanted to be frijeds and be there for either. Wed hang out and still hook up than got to the point where she said this has to stop i can only see u in public or things keep happening. I tried to go friends wrote but it got hard .. went to a bar and saw her dancing with some guy infront of me . Right than and there i decided to do no contact without warning.. she was phased by it after a week of that i told her why. I havent spoken to her in a month tryijg to move on cuz she is leaving.. the other day u reached out to her and said i missed her and was wonderijg if i could see her before she left just to say goodbye.. she said she didnt think that was a good idea. She has moved on and happy doesnt want anything to resufrace before she leaves. That so i said my goodbye than and ended with a friendly note. I told her i will never forget u . You showed me i was capable of love when i never beleived it so on and so forth it was a beautiful message. I than ended it with i hope your trip is as wonderful as you and everything u expect and more.. i got no response at all just blocked instsntly on everything after that. And that hurt.. last time we went for coffee she said she might just be going for 4 months not a year now.. now i dont even know and think she is gone for ever and never see her again
Hey Matt,
Thanks for sharing your story.
I believe that it’s mainly a big misunderstanding or communication breakdown that can be fixed. I suggest booking a coaching session in order for us to work together to fix the deep rooted issues, in order for you guys to be together again down the road.
Sincerely,
Adrian
She leaves in a week and gave me things to a friend.. who knows when if she be back. She completly ignoring me. Think might best to just move.on
Odd though cuz i havent spoken to her in awhilr. I texted her the day she left and said have a good trip but no response.. than later she added me oh social media and looks at my snap chats.. why are girls so odd haha. But need to stop overthinking its probabaly harmless
Let’s work together, I can help you turn this around!
My ex girlfriend split up with me just over a month ago & we were together for 2 & half years. I’m going to go into some detail here of whats happened so you can get an idea of my situation.
So its late 2015 around October time & my girlfriend was just about to start university so we sat down together to come up with a structure of how im going to see her & when, this would be done by train journey. So we figured it out & she started her course at university, everything was going fine, i was coming down when i could & staying the weekends or the days i could get off work to be with her because she was about 1 hour & half train journey from home so it wasn’t easy for her to come back every weekend. Anyway a few months past & it was getting quite hard for me to come down so frequently due to costs & other things which i explained the her & seemed fine, so she ends up going out with a few people from university which was normal & i had full trust for her, but this is where things got a little strange, the day after she had been out i looked at her snapchat story & she was with another guy but in a different kind of way to how you would normally be so i just asked her about it & she said it was nothing & i believed her but what she said next was the big one, she said that when she was out & at the bar with her mate, a lad got talking to her & got the wrong idea & kissed her, she then proceeded to push him away & slapped him, this were her words, so i said the her as calm as i was that we will sort this out but promise me that’s what happened & she did. So without any arguing or anything like that i comforted her because it was a rough time for us both & i tried to make her feel better instead of shit which she said she felt. So a few weeks pass & she’s back home for her brothers birthday & i’m invited round the house to celebrate the occasion, we discussed that we would have a few drinks & spend the night together but as the night went on she wasn’t drinking & being very quiet, which i knew at this point something wasn’t right & she said that she would be the one taking me home that night, anyway she took me home & before i got out the car i just said ‘What is wrong? you’ve been acting strange all night’ & well she just broke down & told me that on that night a lad kissed her it wasnt how she explained it, she said that the two of them had a heart to heart conversation & she felt lonely & they ended up kissing, At this point i’m pretty upset & all i want to do is go mad but i stayed calm & said we will sort this out, she seemed to calm down abit & we talked for over an hour until she calmed down & was ok, she said to me that was the truth & as much as it killed me i said we will work it out, we hugged for ages & we left it at that. To cut it shorter after a rough patch after she went back to university we sorted things out & we were back to normal. Fast forward a few months & she’s taking her final exams for the year & its a stressful time for her & i understood that but at this point she has broken up with me, the reason she broke up with me is because at one point we discussed going away together, a long weekend trip & we found where we wanted to go but she wanted to go early in the year, now at this point chrismtas has just gone & i cant afford a holiday that short notice, she didnt really like that fact but we decided that we would discuss it further in the year, now a few weeks later my friend said they are thinking of getting a group of our mates together & going away & asked if i wanted to be involved & i said yes, i discussed with my ex & said the lads are thinking of going away but havent really decided yet but she seemed ok with it, a month down the line & the holiday comes ups into conversation with my friends & they go ahead & book it without much hesitation, now i go back to my ex to tell her that the holiday has been booked there & then & her reply was ‘Ok’ with a kissing face so i thought that she was ok with it but she wasnt.. We had a conversation about it & she pretty much broke up with me because i didnt consult her first or out her first which in a way i didnt & i felt awful for it, so i said to my friends that i wasnt going, even though my ex said we arent going to get back together i felt it was the right thing to do, so anyway its her exams & im just being supportive as i can. As her exams go on she’s being very blunt with me & not really engaging in conversation, now at this point im used to it so i dont let it bother me, as long as she does well with her exams thats all im bothered about, as the weeks went by she got increasingly angry with me & at some points told me not to speak to her which i didnt, i gave her the space she needed to do what she needed, but as she kept saying to me though all of this is that we arent going to get back together so i might as well go on holiday with my mates i said many times i wasnt going but she kept reverting back to the whole not getting back together & being horrible with me so i thought ‘you know what i deserve to have some fun & relax’ so thats what i did, i told my friends i was going away with them but i didnt say anything to my ex until she got back because i didnt want it to get in the way of her exams or revision. Right fast forward & the exams are done with & she’s on her way home, now this is where for me things change a bit, so once she’s back home under her own roof with her parents her whole attitude changes towards me, she wants to see my again & conversation goes back to normal, we arent back together but thats what it felt like. She’s picking me up from work & dropping me off ,she’s coming to see me in the evenings & she even comes round my house a few times & just do the things couples do, so at this point everything is normal, but im keeping quite vigilant because i know how she is & her mood can change so quick. So at this point she is aware im going away with my friends & everything just flips on its head she says we cant do this anymore & she said all of this would of had to come to an end anyway when the holiday came around so might as well get it done now & that was it she went back to being blunt on texts & not really interested. So fast forward again & its a Saturday night & she is still being how she was over text but she got quite angry with me this night & told me not to speak to her & if i saw her that night not to approach her, so i responded with a simple ok & went out to a different part of town to her. I’m out with my brother & old works mates & we got chatting to these twos girls, nothing in it just a normal conversation, as you do, anyway when they were leaving they wanted a picture with myself & my brother which we did, now one of the girls only came up to my shoulder & i didnt realise this at the time but she’s but she face on my top & a bit of makeup in on the arm of my shirt, so we head back to town where my ex is & we bum it to each other.. (like that wasn’t going to happen) anyway because we both had a drink we shared a few words & went home. I woke up the next morning & felt really bad for the night before so i went to her house & apologized for my behavior & she pretty much said we cant be friends & we cant see each other anymore & she then mentioned the makeup on my shirt which i explained the situation but as you can probably guess she didn’t believe me she thought i had cheated on her which i said was stupid to think considering the pain i went through when she did it to me, i wouldn’t put her though that, anyway she didn’t believe me & we left it at that but we still texted each other & spoke everyday. Ok so lets fast forward again & after thats blown over a little bit she goes back to wanting to see my & pick me up from work & everything else but again she blows hot & cold, she then turns it on its head again & reverts back to saying we cant do this & it was only going to happen anyway when the holiday came round.. so back to square one again but this time she is being quite nasty with her texts & pretty much bringing any minor detail up in our relationship to make me out i’m a horrible person & that i never appreciated anything her family did for me, even though that was nonsense anything i said she didnt really care & proceeded to come out with everything i had done wrong & use it against me. She would revert back to this whole makeup situation & pretty much say ive cheated when i haven’t, it was like she was expecting a different answer but all i could tell her was the truth but that wasn’t enough, anyway she go so mad & pretty much told me to stop speaking to her or she’s block me, i just answered her then she pretty much blocked me off everything you could imagine, apart from email.. So that was it she blocked me out of her life completely without really giving me a chance.
Ok we are nearly there so bare with, now she’s gone on holiday for two weeks which i was aware of before everything kicked off royally & while she was away it was my friends 21st birthday party which i was attending, now while im at this party she message one of the lads that was there on snapchat & this is what she put ‘Please keep an eye on Alex because i know what he’s like once he’s had a drink, he’s a little snack’ now i expected her to message someone but not like that, it was quite shocking really & the words were unexpected but i got on with my night & actually spoke with one of her mates, now this is where things get silly, she had been going around telling her mates that i had cheated on her, now to hear that was heartbreaking really considering i know the feeling of being cheated on & i wouldn’t ever dream of doing that to someone i actually care for so i asked if she could have a work with my ex once she was back.
So she returns from holiday & i know her mate with speak to her but in the mean time i actually sent her an email just asking why she would say that, now it didnt really go down well & she basically just said that i have cheated on her but havent got the bollox to admit it.. Honestly fighting a loosing battle. A week goes by & i said to myself that i cant just leave it on that note with how the emails went, so i went round her house that i had nothing to lose. We spoke & she said she was glad i came round to kind of end things on a good note, she started on with the fact i spoke to her mate while she was away & she said she regretted sending that message to that lad but we sorted that, but this is the proper kick in the shin but i was kind of expecting it, she said that she was speaking with another lad & that she was going to be meeting up with him at some point, to me everything has gone so quick for her to go from A to B i didnt really know what to think so im currently into over months no contact, I’ve tried emailing her once a couple of days ago but didn’t get a reply.
I’m sorry its so long i just wanted to give you a good idea of the situation & some advice really.
Hey Alex,
Thanks for sharing your story but it’s just way too in depth.
In order for me to provide you with a proper response, I recommend booking a phone coaching session.
Sincerely,
Adrian
How do I do that?
Thanks
Alex
You can do so here: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Adrian,
My ex has had me blocked since we broke up, I’ve not long back sent her a letter just explaining that I’m ok with the break up & I do have something exciting to tell her but how do I go about it if she still hasn’t unblocked me?
Thanks
I’ve known my ex for 3 years. The first year we knew eachother he was a typical bad boy, had feelings for his ex and messed me around. He’d come over and we’d sleep together, then I’d want more and he’d block me for a week or two then we’d repeat that for the whole year. There was never any other girls though, only me. So last year in March after 2 months no contact I see him out and we connect and I don’t let him stay and he spends a few weeks proving he wants more etc. We end up in a relationship for 7/8 months. Then he breaks it off because he said I was too clingy and I didn’t trust him etc.
He then got drunk and slept with a mutual friend of ours. For a month we were on/off in touch and did sleep together once. Then I started to get on with things and beginning of November he came back and we got together again. This time it only lasted till January and he left again because once again I was not trusting him and now had this issue with our friend hed slept with during the break up.
He blocked me and then once again we ended up back in touch and sex then blocked. Then end of March this year we got back together and it was good. I was still overcoming issues but I trusted him more and we worked out things out.
(I know it sounds bad- but together we were good and he never once hurt me. He wouldn’t even like another girls picture! He was s great boyfriend)
We sat and talked and he always said- he was sorry for the past and he’d loved me for a long time but was too stupid to realise and everytime we broke up it hurt him and he wanted another girl as a distraction.
Anyway we broke up 3 weeks ago. He said he wasn’t happy and couldn’t see him being happy and felt things weren’t ever going to improve. He blocked every social media. I emailed him trying to convince him, like 1-3 evey day for 2 weeks. Then I found out he’s casually dating his manager who he’s only known 2 weeks..
I’ve got angry and drunk and sent horrible messages and the last thing he said was he didn’t want me contacting him, I’m harassing him and he’s said for 3 weeks it’s over and he doesn’t want to be with me. I sent him a reply saying I was sorry and will move on and respect his wishes and haven’t had any contact since. It’s only been like 3 days.
I’m stuck. I love him so much and our relationship wasn’t bad- but I was insecure and I worried about our past- I was finally overcoming all that and he left telling me he wasn’t happy and never will be with me. He’s now seeing someone else (I’m sure is a rebound as he’s admitted he always needs a distraction) but it hurts so much. We have a lot of mutual friends so I see posts about them and him at festivals etc.
I know I need to move on but I don’t want to as everytime he’s come back and I know if he came back again it would work as I’ve learnt from my mistakes. But everyone I know believes I’ll never hear from him again..
Hey Anna,
Harassing him is not the way to go. If you don’t quickly turn things around you risk losing him for good. I strongly suggest that you reach out to me in order for us to work together to turn this around.
Book a coaching session if you are serious about getting him back.
Sincerely,
Adrian
My ex broke up with me about 6 weeks ago. About a week and a half after the break up, we talked to each other for the first time and it was a normal conversation. A few days later, we talked again and ended up hooking up. That week we texted and snapchatted a few times, including a text asking if I knew something she needed to know on Friday. That Saturday, she blocked me on Facebook, Instagram, and snapchat not long after I liked one of her Instagram posts. We haven’t talked since (it’s been more than three weeks) and I’ve been in the same room as her twice (yesterday and the day before) and she acts cold when near me but normal when she’s more than 2 feet away. Any help/advice for me? I want to know what’s going on
Hey Henry,
I will need to know a bit more about your relationship, how long you were together and under what circumstances you are seeing each other in order to provide you with some feedback. The best would be for you to book a coaching session in order for me to provide you with a comprehensive game plan and approach.
All the best,
Adrian
Hi My ex, he broke up with me now two weeks ago, we were fighting and having arguments before we even break up, we had been together for a year and a half. After we broke up, I texted him saying how I feel and I wanna fix the relationship. So, He texted me back saying ok let have two weeks breaks after that we start text each other and then yesterday we had argument again over text and then I called him again and again after that he blocked me from every where including whatapps , facebook and instagram. The last text he told me he will let me go if I am thinking he is abusing me that what he said. and then he blocked me from everywhere any help advice please
Hey, I think this may be a simply miscommunication issue. Reach out to me and book a coaching session so that I can provide you with some guidance.
Hope to hear from you soon,
Adrian
Okay I have a question. I will not write my whole story as it will take a very long time and will also hurt me. Its been a year since she blocked me. Yes a year and we have not contacted for last one year and deep inside I know that ofcourse she does not not want me to contact, neither she is intrested. Painful words right. I have read everything here and it was a very good article. But what if I follow everything and take it positively and she still does not seem to be interested? Already it’s been a year now.
Okay I have a question. I will not write my whole story as it will take a very long time and will also hurt me. Its been a year since she blocked me. Yes a year and we have not contacted for last one year and deep inside I know that ofcourse she does not not want me to contact, neither she is intrested. Painful words right. I have read everything here and it was a very good article. But what if I follow everything and take it positively and she still does not seem to be interested? Already it’s been a year now.
Hey Lakshit,
Thanks for reaching out!
I don’t know your story or why the breakup happened so it’s a bit difficult for me to advise you here…but if you’ve had no contact for a year you should perhaps consider healing and moving on. I could help you in that regard if you’re interested.
From my heart to yours,
Adrian
So, I’m not trying to win back my ex or anything. I’m just curious as to why he blocked me. I’m not even sure if I can call him an ex, we were never exclusive but we did “see” each other for the better part of a year, he did say he loved me a few times but I never said it back as I thought he didn’t mean it, admittedly I would change the subject anytime he tried to talk about being more serious or having a future together because I knew I wasn’t the only girl he was seeing, he was a huge player. At the time I was 16 and he was 20, one of my friends told me he kissed her when they were drinking. I didn’t tell him about it at the time I just completely stopped answering any calls from him or even his friends. About a year later I texted him to let him know that I had gotten married, he said a few mean things about my husband who had apparently already texted him pretending to be me. Anyways that was all a long time ago about 9 years. I added him on facebook about a year ago and was happy to see that he is in a happy committed relationship with kids but then deleted him because I didn’t want my husband to get jealous, he sent me a friend request within a week which I accepted but then a few days later his account was deleted, or so I thought. Today I found out that he had actually blocked me, I was really surprised because although we had send each other friend requests we never actually talked to each other on FB or in any other way. I don’t understand why he went so far as to actually block me rather than unfriend me, after all we were never serious and it’s not as though I was liking his photos or sending him messages. So why did he block me?
I also feel like I should mention that he does have other girls on his friend list who he’s dated so it’s not as though he’s not allowed to add his ex’s or something.
I was in a LDR with a man I became very fond of quickly. We’d talk about 10 hours a day or at least text all day everyday for months. I had the opportunity to visit him 5 months ago and even met his wonderful family. He would ask me if I could love him and even spend my life with him. I’d tell him IF things go that way then yes I could see that. We’ve told each other how strongly we felt for one another and he even took me to Mass with him (he’s Catholic). I didn’t want to go but I had to go back home for work. After I got back he kept saying how sad he was and missed me. The feeling was mutual. Things suddenly turned weird about two weeks later. He said he needed space and it had nothing to do with me. I know I was acting needy and even got annoyed with him. He drinks quite a bit every evening and throughout our relationship would often pick apart things I’d say and get offended easily. He’d say “goodbye” or “I’m done” even before I went to see him. However when he’d wake up the next morning he’d apologize to me and ask me to forget what he said before. A month after I returned home, he told me that his conscience was on fire because he stole money from the parish he worked for. I’m not a judgmental person and did so much for him. He wouldn’t even pay me a compliment let alone do anything nice for me. I arrived on my birthday when I went to see him and didn’t even get a “Happy Birthday”. I’m not a materialistic woman at all but kind words go a long way with me. A couple weeks later he became more and more distant and started to say more hurtful things. I cried myself to sleep more times than I can count over him. Why do I still love and care about him?? I’ve never been revengeful but he got to me so bad that I wrote the Priest of the parish he works for and told him what my ex told me about taking the money. It’s something I regret to this day and now his family are angry with me. I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt anyone but his heavy drinking and money problems worried me. I did the NC for over a month and even felt a little better over time. Well he reached out to me but only to harass me about some stupid rumours he heard about me. I’ve told him I moved on and just wanted to be peaceful. I have been talking to another guy but haven’t went out with or even met him. I know it’s a rebound. My ex heard about the guy I’m talking to, but doesn’t know him, and I thought it was weird he even brought it up to me. He’s told me he never loved me, detests me, and wants nothing to do with me. However, every time he hears something else not true about me, he messages me saying I’m pathetic. He then said an ex gf he had years ago is the only girl he’s ever loved. It got to me so bad that I told him off and said she looked like a troll and maybe he should try to get back with her. I get so mad at myself when he pushes me to the point I stoop to his level and say mean things back. Well I wrote his Priest the other day and tried to make peace with what I did by writing him to begin with. I apologised and said that there’s a possibility my ex lied to me because he said that he told me that to push me away. That makes no sense to me since all he had to do was break up with me. Not come up with some ridiculous thing he did or didn’t do. I explained to the Priest that I was hurt and don’t believe my ex would’ve taken money from the parish (although idk). Yesterday he wrote me telling me to stay out of his life and blocked me. I’m just wanting peace between us and wish we could at least be friends and talk like we used to. I know he doesn’t trust me and I don’t blame him. I’m going to have to go back to the NC again but I can’t help but wonder what he really feels for me and if I’m wasting my time. Even his family asked me how I put up with him. He’s over 40, never married, and has no children. I still miss him so much and wish I could go back in time and have left him alone when he asked for space. What do you think I should do? I adore his family and still keep in touch with his sister. No matter how crude he could be to me sometimes, I understand he’s been hurt in his life and didn’t want to be just another reason he can’t trust anyone. I’ve thought about writing a letter explaining everything honestly and preparing to never hear from him again. I don’t know what to do but I just can’t stop thinking about him. I don’t want anyone else…..
Hello Karen,
My sincere apologies that it took so long to get back to you… I am overwhelmed with coaching requests. I encourage you to book a session as well in order for me to dedicate the time necessary to provide you with answers to your questions and clear game plan.
All the very best,
Adrian
For the record I enjoyed attending mass with him and everything we did together. He’s not in to PDA and would walk ahead of me and sometimes looked “annoyed”. I’d ask him what was wrong but he’d snap at me. I also paid for everything when I went to see him. To clarify, he lives over 9,000 miles away from me but I’m planning on moving near his location within the year. He’s the first man I’ve fallen for in over a decade. He can be sweet when he wants to but I felt like I had to walk on eggshells around him. I was careful about things I said as I said he’d get offended easily and seemingly give up. We tended to argue more than I ever had with anyone I’ve ever known. He told me that when he was with his ex gf that all they did was argue “ALL the time!”. He said when he left to go home (that was also a LDR), she had married someone else. I truly think he told me she’s the only one he’s ever loved to get to me. Sorry for the long story but it’s a saga that idk when it will end or what will happen. I feel hopeless that we will ever be friends and that makes me sad. He’s blocked me on social media before but later unblocked me at some point. Why would he unblock me?? He said he was deleting the App we’ve been chatting/talking on but he didn’t. I should also mention we play an online game and are in the same alliance. He booted me from the alliance once, has threatened to boot me since, and has even messaged me on there. I ignore him and don’t say anything if I see he’s on. We’ve been on the game over a year and it’s one I truly enjoy. We’re in the top/highest ranked alliance and as childish as it may sound, I don’t want to leave. We both have friends in there. He brought our relationship to the game but I don’t say anything negative about him. I know he’s said things about me but I refuse to do the same….. I’m so confused ?
Hi Adrian.
I have been with my ex for two years. we broke up last year. after much back and forth we got back together. but then broke up again two months later. we broke up because we had a row where I basically emasculated him and blamed him for some of the problems we had and brought in the past into the argument, it was all said in the heat but the damage was done. I did not mean any of it. this time he said there will e no going back and forth and no trying to patch the relationship! He made it clear it was over. I did no contact for a few weeks and text him. He still was not having it. I did no contact again for a few weeks and contacted him. he then completely blocked me: he blocked me on watsapp, phone text phone calls and even email. Neither if us use Facebook or have mutual friends. Anyhow I did another period of No contact for 33 days and then posted him a scrap book with all our photos. I wrote an accompanying letter simply saying “hope you like the gift, hope you are well!” I still have not heard anything back! Its been pretty much three months since break up, and he has not made any form of contact with me in those three months. Its a long distance relationship he lives about 2.5 hour drive away. So Adrian, please tell me – considering I have tried the no contact, the hand written letter with a scrap book to no avail, do you think I can safely say this relationship is over and move on? Or do you think there is anything more I can do to win him back?
Thanks
Hey!
Although you’ve made many many mistakes I think that we can still turn this around. Please book a coaching session in order for us to get started right away.
Best,
Adrian
Me and gf were together for about 3.5 years. We were close friends in our college..slowly it turned into a comitted relationship. She broke up with me 6 months ago :'(. Another guy of my college who was my friend proposed her. Now they both r together. I love her so much. I feel like dying. I begged her, pleased her for a second chance. She blocked me from social media. I want her back. I couldnt live without her. Please help me to get back to her. I hate my life:'(:'(
Hey Venk, it’s a tough situation and I fell for you. I highly suggest that you book a coaching session in order for us to look into every possible solution to turn this around.
I hope to hear from you,
Sincerely,
Adrian
Ok so here’s some background with me and my ex. We met at work and instantly became friends. He had a girlfriend at the time and I had a boyfriend, both of us ended our relationships after about two months of hanging out as friends and enjoying each other’s company. We decided to date, but he admittedly told me he was going to have a kid with his ex and the only reason he was staying with her was because the baby, but then he met me. Our time together was perfect we would go to concerts raves dancing and we were inseparable. Even after his kid was born we still spent lots of time together and everything was fine. Around June I found out I was pregnant. He told me he was happy and that we could be a little family. I believed everything he told me. However I noticed that ever since I became pregnant, he started to go MIA on me for a week at a time. With no explanation. One time after those weeks we broke up he admitted he tried to get back with ex and even kissed her, but broke it off because it didn’t feel right. He told me he regretted it and we got back together. We fought once more and he finally told me that the reason he blocks me and stops talking to me is because his ex was threatening him to choose between me and her son. My ex told me he didn’t know what to do because he didn’t want to go to court and do everything legally but he wanted to be with me and wished everything could be simple. After we agreed we would figure it out, and that we wouldn’t let anything or anyone ruin our relationship we spent the whole week together and it was perfect. Over the weekend I had to go to the hospital and found out I had a miscarriage at 3 months. After surgery I went home that night we went home that night upset, but glad we had each other for this tough time. The next day we hung out all morning, until he had to leave for his uncles, promising we’d hangout later that night. We left on good terms. That night I called him and realized I was blocked. So I went crazy and called and texted him and reached out to him on every social media we had until he blocked me on everything. With losing the baby then him I felt so confused as to why he would do this. It’s been about 4 days since we had contact. Do you think he’s going to get back with his ex? Should I try to get in contact somehow even though I’m blocked or just forget him and move on? Do you think there is any possibility he will come back? Or since we are no longer pregnant that’s his chance to finally leave me with nothing tying us together? Please help
Hey Jesse,
We can turn this around but you need to act quick and not make any more mistakes! Please book a coaching session with me in order for us to work together and win him back.
Best,
Adrian
He did you a favor, run as fast as you can. It’s a good thing you didn’t have a child with that person. He/she would be fatherless.
Please see below…reach out to me so we can get started working together right away!
Best,
Adrian
Hi I would like to book a coaching session or a continued session to try to get my ex gf back
She is Thai I’m english
Started going out early 2012 for the first year it was great, then I had to return UK for family reasons, she visited me every 6 months and we spoke on the phone everyday. In June 2015 I was feeling insecure and was being nasty so she ended it. I returned to Thailand December after 2.5 years away and had a big row and took my things. Her friend saw me out with a girl next day I get email saying glad u moved on happy for u, then she starts contact and we get back together early Feb 2016 then I had to return UK march 2016 and end April she says she found info on my computer showing I had been out with a few girls and had cheated on her, she ended it again may but we still spoke every few days then in June I could not get hold of her for 2 weeks and in august she tells me she met a guy from USA who had come for holiday for 2 weeks she felt good with him but now he gone back to USA and she talks to him everyday and will go to see him in October.
I’ve not begged or pleaded but I have carried on contact until 2 weeks ago when I went nc, I don’t have fb so we on WhatsApp I know I’m the only person she has on WhatsApp because when I ignored her she didn’t online for 10 days then came on 4 times in 1 day. Now she still pays money to suppliers for my business so I asked her could she still send money for me as I let her use my CSR we help each other. I get a reply 5 mins later she very angry because I mentioned the arrangement and mentions ” get your f….ing ugly gf to come and get ur stuff ( I think she means girl I dated when we split up) so o stupidly replied with some silly comment and that’s it. Later I was feeling bad a and decided to call her and she blocked the call on WhatsApp then me.
I’m stuck in UK till November don’t know what to do and started nc again today
She has not blocked email or message she sent me email saying ” let me know who will pick up your stuff, i don’t care who your with no and who you were with I’m not bothered
Can I get some help pleasr
Hey Peter,
You are in somewhat of a complex situation, book a coaching session in order for us to turn things around!
I hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hi so my ex broke up with me about 2 months ago because of certain actions ive done in the past. He feels as if he gave his all and didnt receive anything at the end. He doesnt trust me. And ive realized way too late what i had infront of me and i never really appreciated him. I tried to make things right way too late. After about a month of being broken up i stopped contacting him for about 2 weeks cause i was too emotional and needed some space, so he started to come around my house we hooked up but he kept saying “were just friends” i played along with it. Later i found out he was talking to someone only days after hooking up. I never brought it up with him cause i felt like i shouldve known better. He acts real funny with me i get the vibe that I annoy him when i try to have a decent conversation with him. But when i tend to ignore him he gets mad or bothered. He seems to be uncomfortable that I have gone out in a couple of dates certain stuff he says or comments lead me to think that he is. We were talking good for about 3 weeks and all of a sudden he blocked me from everything. At this point i dont know how to go about things its very confusing and overwhelming but honestly im very in love with him and I want to atleast try before i really walk away he means allot to me & he was my best friend as well. I want the proper guidance to solve this.
Hey Lindsay,
I see enough signs here to say that it is possible to win him back permanently.
I urge you to book a coaching session in order for us to work together and make it happen.
Wishing you all the best,
Adrian
Hi
Me and my boy friend afte a year relation had an argument over something silly ,then he went distance , that was two weeks ago , he then called me which I missed his call ,so I called him back and after a few min he said he’ll call me back which he didn’t and after two days he blocked me on face book because of a message from a girl sending him love for his birthday ..? And he had replied that was the best ever present he has had for his birthday and love her so much ..
What does this mean ..!?
We dated on and off for 3 years. My ex broke up with me a little over 2 months ago because he wasn’t feeling it anymore except I went into active nc straight away. I heard He started seeing someone shortly after and about a month after we broke up he didn’t block but deleted me on all social media. I don’t no know if he blocked my
Number or not as I have not reached out nor has he. It wasn’t a bad breakup but he seems really bitter and angry about it still from what I’ve heard. During the breakup he told me to move on. Does this sound like a lost cause ?
Hey Katie,
I think that I can help you win him back.
Don’t hesitate to book a coaching session in order for us to discuss.
All the best,
Adrian
Hey Mani, book a coaching session in order for us to discuss over phone or skype.
Looking forward to it.
Best,
Adrian
My boyfriend said “i need a break” – he said he needs a break from the feeling of being far away from the person he love. He said he havent given up and he’s having a hard time now. (By the way – we are in a long distance relationship). What does he really mean about it?
It could mean a lot of different things, I would need to speak to you and know more about the dynamics of your relationship in order to advise.
Please book a coaching session with me so we can discuss.
Best,
Adrian
I met this girl at a gym. We were together while we didn’t get physical we got emotionally intimate. One day she sent me a text saying she was raped and has PTSD. She gradually started backing off than shit got weird. I did not give her the space she deserved. While didn’t contact her I was still around her at the gym. We made up after few week awkward stage and she unfriended me on Facebook. I was upset about it and didn’t handle it well because she listened to other people who had no idea what was going on with her.
In April she randomly blocked me on Instagram. She told someone at the gym how she hates me. I am still at the gym every so often take a break. I go back to the gym in June to get over fears of her thinking I’d rape her. Did it for few weeks than saw each other out and got frustrated she didn’t want to talk so we can put everything behind us because I felt guilty. We are in no contact space since late June on September first she blocks me on Facebook. Find to come out that day her and her boyfriend were at a wedding that day. Should be seeing her Saturday what should I do?
So my boyfriend (now ex) and I got into an argument in June because we would get in like tiny fights that didn’t even matter, and he said I got angry a lot with him. We ended up working things out and it was all good. I think the stress of him being in a full time job, and me trying to take classes and such played a part in that..The next 2-3 weeks were fine, but then another girl entered the picture that I never got a good vibe for. He said nothing was going on between them, but he would always invite her over to his parties and everything. Eventually I got tired of being upset that she was always there and told him to choose between us, and of course he picked me. Yet again, everything was fine for 2-3 weeks, but then he started inviting her again, and I told him I would give her a chance to be my friend, as well to see if she really acted this way towards everyone, because it always seemed like she flirted with him. I agree she kind of does do it to every guy she is with, but it just bugged me that she was doing it to my boyfriend. Well on August 29, we talked things out and what we were going to work on and everything, and things were going good until the next day, I had a stressful day of work and school, and in the middle of it all, I got a text from this girls sister about him possibly cheating and all of that. So when I got off of work I just went off, not thinking before I did so. Well he said he needed to think about this once again, and ended up breaking up with me on August 31. He was still calling me babe until the minute he broke up with me. And we were talking about getting back together, and he was still saying that he loved me and everything. And we did have a serious conversation about cheating, and there was none of that and I do believe that because I have multiple sources, and I believe him as well. Well, I asked if he liked this girl now, and he said “I don’t know, we have a lot in common, and she’s pretty cool, and I don’t know if things will develop from there” and still on September 9, someone asked if he still loved me, and he said he did, but it was too much to handle right now, so I stopped talking to him on September 10 and have been in no contact since, (17 days). Tomorrow marks 4 weeks since we broke up, and he asked that girl out on Friday. And I read somewhere on this site that it is actually pretty common that a rebound relationship takes place about 3 weeks after. September 18 was supposed to be our 2.5 year anniversary, but apparently he took her out on a date that weekend too. We also share some mutual friends, and they said that whenever my name gets brought up, he acts mad. This other girl and I are not very similar at all, she’s kind of crazy, whereas I’m more relaxed (for the most part), and one of my close friends from his school thinks we’re complete opposites. Him and his new girlfriend are posting pictures online and everything, and like using emojis and things to act like they are so happy together. But apparently (through our mutual friends), a few of his guy friends are upset with him, because a lot of girls and guys don’t like them two together, think he’s moving too fast, and they don’t really like the girl he is with, whereas when we were dating, if I wasn’t with him, they would always ask where I was, hoping I would come. I still really care for him, and still love him a lot too. I’m just not sure what to do, and was wondering if you could give me advice? Also, they both just blocked me on all social media.
My ex girlfriend broke up with me just over a month ago. She was moving away, and didn’t feel like we could handle long distance (after constantly trying to convince me we could). I did everything wrong and begged her, became a nuisance, so she blocked me everywhere. She then called me a few days later to tell me that she needed space to settle into her new place, and that she would unblock me. That was 3 weeks ago. I sent her an email, just to say that I now see the relationship ended for the best, and that I’m ready to move on. The door will always be open for her to get in contact. That was a week ago and no reply. I don’t know what to do, I’ve not tried to reach out again and I doubt she will be unblocking me any time soon. I just miss her, I don’t want her back right now because we both need to grow apart and live our life. However I would have liked to get in contact with her in the future. I guess I ruined that.
A guy that I was seeing and having relations with for 2 months accuses me of being with someone else which I was not because he looked through my phone and saw a picture that was showing my breast but I actually took the picture to send to him but I never sent it. So he said I lied to him but I can honestly say that I was never with anyone else. What do you in this case because he is making accusations and assumptions that is not true? He knows my actions. And to be honest our relationship was not that great. We didn’t talk everyday , I found out somethings about him that has being lying to me about from the beginning but I still was giving him the benefit of doubt.
Hey coach, my girlfriend and I would have been together for two years come November. From the first day We hug out I knew I loved this girl, and I even mentioned to my friends that she would be the one I marry. Although things were extremely great we experienced trouble since our second month into dating. I’ll just say that in the first 7 months of our relationship she had cheated on me three times with her ex. Let me mention that we lived together….Each time she would leave and come back and when she came back I never hesitated to accept her back with open arms. I mean I am in love with her so why not? Even though I took her back we still faced the issues at hand and after the third time I felt the need to have “payback”. It was silly of me. So I would message girls and flirt with them and she eventually found out. I was wrong and I regret it, but we managed to work past it until the 1 year and 7 month mark. I was jobless and was desperately searching for a job and could only find part time temporary positions until one day I was offered a great job but it ended up being two hours away. Now me being out of college and her still having two years left, it put us in a sticky situation. We talked about it a little and came to the terms that I take it. We knew it would be difficult but we loved each other and wanted to make it work. It went well at first but we decided to take a break and during the break things were messy. Messy in a sense that we would talk to other people, even hang out with other people. So once we decided to try again we dealt with the issues of the other people. We both requested to delete those off social media so the other wouldn’t feel disrespected. Then we decided to “forget” our past and try for a new fiture. We went on a new “first date” and that whole weekend went well! We decided to hang out the week after and on our date I dipped my elbow in ketchup and she jokingly said “you’re an embarrassment”. It would be a big deal to me if before I had mentioned I felt like she was embarrassed of me because she never told anyone that she was seeing me. So you can imagine it stung and I ended up in an “off” mood that weekend. Once I left we told each ther we had a great weekend. The next day or two the conversation shortened and I felt as if I had to beg her to reply. Once she did, she told me she no longer wanted this. She said she wasn’t bitter but I could sense bitterness in her tone. Then she blocked me. I was in shock and asked why. She said it was because “there’s no need for you one social media”. I proclaimed that if that were the case then there what was the need to keep our pictures on there. And she said “it doesn’t matter”. I said then you should take them off, She said “then they’re gone”. They are still on there to this day. So she blocked me and proceeded to block my friends. She even went to the extent as to get her friends to block me. I’ll admit that it drove me nuts to the point that three days later I made a trip to see her and try to show her I want her back. I showed up with a few of her favorite books, an updated version of our picture album, and flowers. All for her to look out the window and send someone out to tell me that she didn’t want to talk to me and I should leave. I was devastated but I left. Before I left I could see that a picture board I made her is still hanging on her wall, she still uses the blanket that has our names on it to sleep in and my pillow I gave her because she loved it. Now I’ve been informed that she’s proclaiming via social media that she had blocked me and also she is adding the guys back that she deleted off social media. I even caught wind that she may possibly be talking to someone new. I’m broken hearted and I believe God had brought us together to spend eternity together. My love for her runs deep and unconditionally. I would take her back without hesitation every time. I’m afraid she may actually be done but I still have hope she will come back. I would never give up on her or us and I e had friends go through the same situation tell me that after space and a little time, they’re girlfriends came back. So I need help…or is this a lost cause?
My ex broke up with me in 2013, he gave me no valid reason. We were sort of talking after the breakup but just from time to time. He dated another girl that year but he was talking to me through text and we were having a good normal conversation until he tells me that his girlfriend wanted him to block me and at that time I didn’t know he had a girlfriend. Somehow we were put in the same class during our senior year and he would flirt with me a lot. When he would get caught flirting with me, he would blush. My friends were thinking that he probably had feelings for me but I wasn’t so sure. He would be hot and cold with me. Like there are days he treats me right and he’s all nice but then there are days when he’s so bitter with me. He blocked me on Whatsapp, I said something that he took it so seriously and got offended and decided to block me. Then he blocks me on Instagram after finding out that I’m pregnant and it isn’t his baby by the way and I’m single. I messaged him on Facebook to tell him sorry for what I said on whatsapp and he read it and never replied back and I thought he would block me on there too but he didn’t. I don’t know what to do, he’s very confusing.
Hi Jocelyn,
I’m glad you reached out. I’m sorry to hear about your complicated situation and I hope your pregnancy is going well. I’m curious, do you really want to get back with your ex or are you just trying to understand his motives? If you do want him back and since your ex blocked you on social media, I think you’ll get a lot out of my tape, “Back Together When Blocked On Social Media”. It provides thorough insight on this scenario.
Sincerely,
Natalie
My ex and I broke up back in April. When we first got together the relationship took off really well (more serious than I expected). I had some issues i was dealing with and I didn’t tell him about an ex boyfriend i had living with me helping him out until he had back surgery. I didn’t see the harm in telling him because we weren’t officially a couple yet. I have been honest with him the whole time and in April I broke up with him because i felt there was something wrong and wanted to talk about it but he just took it as lets break up and that was not my intention. I have done some crazy stuff because i want to be with him. I love him very much and I know right now he has no time for a relationship. Well I have been blocked on social media and manged to get unblocked from his phone. I saw him a few weeks back and he asked me how many people have you had sex with and who? no bull Shit. So i was completly honsetly with him. But why would he ask me that question if he doesn’t want to be with me? Or is he just telling me that he doesn’t want to be with because he really does. How do i get him back? Then he said that the drama and bull shit needs to stop and it wouldn’t hurt but he needs time. Does this me he wants to work out the relationship and truly wants to be with me but is telling me the opposite. Please help.
My ex and I had a long distance and it went sour after his last visit. I kinda explained it was getting too difficult so he left without saying bye and then he blocked me in social media. I was suspicious of him seeing another woman in his hometown but I really can’t prove it. We only text each other a little bit but he expressed that he’s going through something. I want him back but I’m not sure if it will ever be the same.
My ex and I were suppose to get married in December and he already canceled on me twice and he was thinking about canceling again and saying everything negative that would happen so I told him the truth that if we didn’t get married I couldn’t do it anymore… I’m not an option but before he broke up with me he was so happy that we were gonna get married and spend the rest or our lives together and he told me he couldn’t live without me… I just don’t understand why he would break up with me and then block me on messaging and social media
Hi Melissa,
Thank you for your share. I know you must be very frustrated with your current situation. Please excuse my delayed response, I’ve been tied down with coaching. If you’re trying to get back with your ex, but he’s blocked you on social media, I think the no-contact rule is a great start at making him return to you for the long-term. Controlling the urge to reach out will be challenging, but I can help. Please feel free to reach out to me during this.
Sincerely,
Natalie
Hello I am having hard time letting go of my ex we broke up may he block me never wanted talk to me we started talking again couple months later here and there till we would hangout for little but it wasn’t enough for me I wanted more I would ask him what are we what we doing say friends then said never change or get it and my attitude when he don’t go out way for me like use to always like talk me see me then told him I can’t be friend please leave me alone don’t text me or call me then some girl message me on Facebook saying he got girl desperate and to leave Dennis alone baby bullshit and text him cursing out I block Facebook we aren’t friends but following me we are friends Instagram but he get mad post quotes up bout deserving good guy or man wants women nothing stop him don’t know do I do want us get back together
He blocked me on WhatsApp and Viber because he cannot bear my nagging anymore. He feels angry each time we connect. Will he unblock me soon ?
Hey coach,
never thought that I would ever join a group like this, but I need all the help I can get to win back ‘the one that got away’.
my ex (never thought I would call her this) broke up with me just over 2 weeks ago, after we booked her in to a centre for people with depression-I believe she has some mood-disorder.
we’ve been together for almost 4years and this was the second time she decided to end things-I was not given a concrete reason for her wanting out of our relationship, except that we are too different-the break up was very impersonal with the spycologis sitting there the whole time (creating a safe environment-not sure what that meant? ).
I am again left with so many questions (1st time I also never received an answer as to why she left ).
after the quick and impersonal breakup I haven’t tried to contact her as I want to show her that I respect her decision, even though I don’t agree and had no say in this, but she blocked me from social media anyway about a week after the breakup.
I’ve been reading about the so called ‘no contact rule’ but I’m still very hurt with everything just ended and I don’t know how to cope anymore?
is there still a chance in getting back with her? I truly feel that we have a great future, if we both understand the depression and work as a team to overcome this-how do i get her back?
thanking you in advance for your assistance, this was my first official post on such a forum
Cev
Hey Cev, thank you for sharing your story. It must be tough not having any answers. A key element to the “no contact approach”, even if your ex blocked you on social media, is to take the time to rebuild confidence and self-awareness (she needs to do this, too). I have an article about this under the “blog” tab, but feel that since your situation is quite unique, you’d benefit from a personal session with me. Feel free to reach out to me directly so we can set something up. I look forward to helping you through this. Sincerely, Adrian
Adrian I could really use your help can you please confirm tact me at jdmaccord96792@gmail.com please
My ex broke up with me over a month ago after 3 years. We were very close, but didn’t get to see eachother often s she works 2 jobs and goes to school this drove me a little crazy, seeing her only a few hours a week, and I became needy. So she left. She never told me why, but I know why. I was devastated, and looking back, though I didn’t mean to, I harassed her, mainly because she never said a word to me after leaving me or told me why she was leaving. Imy ashamed of it, but it’s done. I have been blocked from her phone, and I don’t use social media, so Facebook isn’t an option to allow her to see me.
I don’t know what to do… I know she still loves me she just got fed up. I would do anything to get her back, no matter how long it takes to get there. Please help.
Hi CC,
I’m Coach Natalie and new to the team. I wanted to take a moment to reply to your comment, because I felt it touched me personally. If your ex blocked you on social media and left because you were being needy, I encourage you be the opposite for a bit, to show her you have changed. When she sees your ability to live without her, she’ll be receptive when you reach back out later on.
Sincerely,
Natalie
My issue is that I don’t use social media and it’s my phone that is blocked. I don’t even know how to reach out to her
Hey Adrian, my fiancee broke up with me a month and a half after being together for 2 years. I was too clingy and jealous in our last period together because he was starting to distance from me. I know I was wrong and he felt suffocated and thats why he left me. anyway at the end of our relationship he went to new job and there was a girl there, it was clear she was trying to hit on him. she kept reacting love and commenting on his posts on facebook and bring him food and medicine. I talked to him about it a calm way just told him to let her know that he is not available and he said he is not interested in her but he is not feeling he loves me like before so we decided to keep a space but after 4 days he sent me msg saying sorry and after that the conversation got heated and he said he no longer in love with me and we broke up. I accepted and applied no contact for only 15 days without begging or posting any sad posts but unfortunately I made a mistake after that. before we break up he didn’t react with the girl and after the breakup he seemed sad but after 15 days from the breakup he started reacting with her even he played a words game with her and it was very provocative. any way at this time I called him and talked with him in a cool way asking if that was his final decision to breakup and that I saw the comments with the girl and it raised questions as we just broke up 15 days ago so he got mad and said he doesn’t love me anymore and he is not interested in the girl or anyone. I told him I am not calling to beg I just want to understand and to make sure that we won’t regret the decision or just lose the relation out of boredom but he said its not boredom I just don’t love u anymore so I wished him good luck and blocked him on facebook to avoid getting jealous again and started no contact again and kept posting positive things and not mentioning anything about the relation. I intend to make the no contact longer this time because he is expecting me to call because of my previous attitude. I am trying not to check his account but yet I am checking it from time to time just to know how things going but I don’t react at all and he just doesn’t publish anything public because of course he is expecting I am checking and he wants to avoid the drama because of my previous attitude. I no longer act the same but he doesn’t know and I want to show him that I have changed but I don’t know how specially that I blocked him and I can’t unblock it will be obvious that I want to check on him. I checked the girl’s account and she posts romantic posts and he reacted love on all of them and I assume they are together now and I wish its just a rebound. now I lasted one month without contacting after that call and I show happiness on facebook wishing he might check the account from any other account but not sure if he will be that curious. I dont know now how long should I extend the no contact specially if he already in a rebound now and feels happy and how I broke the no contact without looking needy because he might not respond as long as he is happy in the relationship.
Hi Sarah,
Thank you for being open to sharing your story. I’m Coach Natalie and I’m new to the team. When I saw your comment, I felt I could identify with it and wanted to reach out. He may have distanced himself because he found you were being too needy. If in response to this, you became more needing of his affection, then you may have pushed him further away. Please take a look at Coach Adrian’s “Crash Course” on our website. This may help!
Sincerely,
Natalie
Sent you an email…will remove your message for confidentiality purposes for you, linked to your contact info
Hey Adrian, please contact me asap. I need help with a breakup with my gf. We live together i really need help please. Ljrhcmb95@gmail.com is my email
Hey Raymond, I reached out to you via email in order for you to book a coaching session. Hope to speak to you soon!
Sincerely,
Adrian
I had been with my ex since age 16, I’ll be 26 in December. I had become frustrated with everything back in January and kicked him out, he moved back with his parents. Over the summer I had bought a new home and focused on my daughter and myself, I was keeping very distant from my ex hoping I would move on. I love him so dearly but he’s all I’ve ever known, I didnt know if I needed to leave him or what. We lacked communication (looking back now) and kicking him out was… going over board but I was mad and so sure I wouldn’t regret it.. yet here I am 11 months later sulking. I had seen him at the beginning of October when his grandma came to pick my daughter up and was just filled with all these emotions. I texted and messaged him, he said we can’t get back together, we obviously aren’t meant to be together if we break up. It tore me to pieces. I love this guy. Love him. He blocked me in everyway except on voxer and I admit.. I was being too much.. too needy. It shows he reads my voxer messages so I made the last one short and sweet. His mom and I are close and she relays how he feels to me.. he’s sad and blocks me so he doesn’t have to think about everything and he wants to be left alone for now. It’s hard. This whole year without him was rather tough and I know I got through it but I was the one who ended it based off anger and my mom told me I’d regret it.. I didnt think I would at the time tho.
How much time should I wait to see if I’m unblocked and such? I don’t want to be crazy but.. he’s my high school sweetie and I was a bitch for making just a bland decision but it’s taught me I love and appreciate him.. rather than wanting him because I’m lonely. Maybe he wants space to see if he feels the same? With the holidays coming up and we aren’t together I still want to get him SOMETHING he’s my hunny :/
Me and my ex were in a relationship of a year. He broke up with me because he had just started college and was finding it stressful. When he’s stressed or tired he can snap easy and is grumpy. I would get really worried that he would leave me and beg for him not too. when he broke up with me he said we could be best friends. He still loved me. But it was a inconvenient time for a relationship but hoped for one in the future. I made the mistake of through this time being super clingy and expressing my feelings of hurt. He would be nice to me then a ass. Block me then unblock me. This was on and off. Eventually he snapped and blocked me on everything. I think he’s in a relationship now. I badly badly want him back. But I don’t know how to now as im blocked on everything and if he’s in a relationship. Please help
Hi Elly,
I’m really sorry to see the hurt you’re currently feeling. It can be really painful to miss or feel rejected by the one you love. If your ex blocked you on social media, you should use this time to reinvent yourself. Return to the woman he fell in love with. Like you had previously mentioned, being needy and clingy only pushed him further away. By not being either of those things, he’ll start to feel like you’ve changed. This way, when you reach out in the future, he’ll be more likely to respond and even be comfortable with additional contact after that. You can do this!
Sincerely,
Natalie