Your partner left you and you are looking for a solution for suffering less? How do you rebuild yourself after a breakup and make your ex see you in the best light possible? How do you move forward after a separation when you don’t know what made your ex leave you?
It’s not always easy to say, “I got dumped and I need to look ahead and not backwards,” and yet you have to take the time and make the effort to rebuild yourself and move towards new goals. In this article, I’m going to help you regain self-confidence and rediscover a taste for life, in order to take the edge off your suffering until it becomes a thing of the past.
The pain and heartache that a person feels after a breakup is comparable to mourning. You’ve just lost the person you love most in the world, with whom you were planning your future. On top of being broken up with, your whole life feels like it’s falling apart and all your plans no longer make sense.
Together, we are going to work on getting you out of this slump and helping you find happiness again. When you’ve just been dumped, your main mission will consist of taking each piece of advice and turning it into an action, day after day, in order to move forward and to lift your head back up after a breakup.
Getting Dumped Isn’t Easy: Here is how you understand the breakup.
News of a breakup can always be perceived as a rejection of your love life. If your ex made the decision to leave, it’s simply because they were no longer happy in your relationship.
Unfortunately, not many people tend to fight for saving their relationship, and as soon as the point of no return has been reached, a breakup is inevitable. Do you want to do something about it and make your ex want you back? Then I invite you to read this article in which I give you my plan of action to get your significant other back. You can also read my book on the A to Z on how to get back with your ex.
Take a moment to think about the”Why” of your breakup and your partner’s unhappiness. In all honesty, ask yourself what wasn’t working out in your relationship? What were the signs (that you may have missed) that your ex gave you?
Once you understand the famous “Why” your ex left, your negative emotions will no longer be an obstacle because you’ll know exactly what you will need to zero in on. What I see a lot of people doing wrong is saying that they understand but they do not truly understand. The reason I say this is because a lot of time consciously we know what we did wrong but we don’t dig more to find out why we let these things happen to our relationship. A lot of times maybe you felt insecure so you let your partner get the best of your insecurities or maybe your partner did things to you to raise your insecurities. That’s why its so important that you take the time to really understand why this has happened in your relationship and were the insecurities came from and practice on healing that. Everything has a surface its about what is under the surface that needs to be recognized in order to really see what negative emotions need to be healed.
The hardest part of being broken up with is not knowing or understanding the reasons behind it. This is especially hard for those of you that didn’t try to fight for your relationship because you were unaware of your ex’s unhappiness. This is why I invite you now to ask yourself pertinent questions and to put yourself in your ex’s shoes so that you may better understand the heartache that your other half may have felt during your relationship.
Just Got Dumped: But Now I’ve Changed.
After having thoroughly analyzed the situation, you’ve come to the conclusion that the separation is stupid, and that you are fully capable of changing what needed to be changed. So, should you march up to your ex and tell them your reasoning? The answer is NO.
As I explain in my books, “70 Pro Tips To Get Back With Your Ex” it’s crucial to set up a game plan to be able to deeply analyze when and how your words can deeply resonate within your ex. You can’t jump into this mission to be forgiven and to prove that you really have changed, and expect to be taken back in a heartbeat. Especially if you’ve just recently been dumped you can’t expect to be able to prove all of these things to your significant other and have them take you back within the span of two or three days.
It would be the worst mistake that you could make because you could seem dependent and spark a negative, angry reaction in your ex because they won’t understand your relentlessness – especially if only a few days ago, you were in the wrong. This is where patience is so important. Time is your best friend right now. The worse thing you can do in these moments continues to harp on why they haven’t reached out to you and also constantly call or text them. If they already blocked you from all points of contact that’s ok. Right now is the time that you need to take some time to take a couple steps back and reflect on why you are overly trying to reach out to get their attention and waiting for a response. Like I said before, time is your best friend right now and you still have the chance to prove yourself if you take the necessary actions that I explain in this article.
So even if you think that this decision is “stupid and useless,” your responsibility is to take the time to regain control of your emotions, rebuild yourself with the help of this next paragraph, and to be careful not to place too much pressure on your shoulders to be forgiven. In fact, contrary to what you might think, time can be a good ally when you are hoping for forgiveness. In many circumstances, it allows your ex the time they need to calm down and gain perspective.
I Got Dumped: What Do I Do Next?
This is the most common question I get when coaching someone after a breakup. Just as I previously mentioned I know sometimes it can feel like you just got the wind kicked out underneath you and that’s totally normal. What you want to make sure you don’t do is harp on these feelings for too long and also ignore these feelings as it can make you angry, sad, and avoidant of what went wrong in the relationship. Understand that its ok to feel disappointed or down but don’t let this carry on too much. Make sure you focus on the fact that you are alive and you have full control to get over this or fix this but the power lies within you! Taking the easy way out and feeling sad or depressed might be more appealing to you now but ultimately will not be the way to get your ex back or to get them to notice you after the breakup.
The way you get your ex to notice you is by change. The most important action behind all of this is to take accountability for the breakup even if it’s not your fault. Why? Because typically it takes two to get to where you are today and taking the time to reflect on what should not have been tolerated in your relationship is essential at this point. Reflecting on where things went wrong and why you let them continue or let your emotions continue to fester is what you should be focusing on. I would suggest to take some time and write things down. Write down why this happened and what were your feelings behind why these arguments happened, and why your arguments may have gotten out of control. I speak about this because this is where change really happens! I like to call it the rescue plan.
Once you do this you start getting back to the old you that your ex first fell in love with. It’s important that you surround yourself with people who are positive and uplift you and make you happy. If there is something that you have been wanting to do or somewhere you’ve been wanting to travel to now is the time to take the bull by its horns and take that trip! There is nothing more freeing than getting grounded and getting back to the person you use to be but the better version when you first met your ex. Once shifts like this happen you start to reset your method of who you are and what happened in the relationship. Think of it like this, you ground is more stable once you have control of your emotions. Your tendency not to overreact and get highly emotional is something your ex will be able to see when you speak to them again. This will draw questions towards your ex to find out how much you really changed and they will want to see you more. Remember, your ex and you shared beautiful memories and a great love. It is not going to be easy for them to forget about you and especially when they see an impactful change.
How To Get Over Being Dumped.
It’s not easy getting rid of these negative emotions. I know it’s difficult to put yourself back together when you tend to break down in tears multiple times every day after a breakup without even knowing why?
There is no miracle solution, but I’m the relationship expert that will help you surpass your limits by stepping out of your comfort zone, and by taking control of your own well-being. Whether it is because you got dumped, kicked out, broken up with, the reasoning remains the same!
I know full well that when your soulmate leaves you you want nothing more than to hide away in bed, watching series, eating Nutella by the spoonful… And yet, if you want to bounce back after a breakup, you’re going to have to force yourself to get some fresh air. You’ll notice that a little weekend in the mountains, to the beach, or a fun-packed adventurous weekend will always help.
But this isn’t the only way to make yourself feel better. So, make an effort to spruce yourself up and buy a new outfit, perfume, or even get a nice haircut. This will help you to feel attractive and confident before you leave your house. This is a great way to boost your self-confidence.
Once you’ve gotten past the first step, I’m going to suggest that you take up a physical activity to help release those negative feelings. By pushing yourself a little bit further each day, you will feel significantly better! So now is the time to turn off the computer and go outside and revitalize yourself!
The third step is to leave no time for your negative emotions to get the better of you. Work extra hard at your job, spend plenty of time with friends and family. Paint the town red and you’ll see the world through rose-colored glasses again in no time!Do the things that make you happy and get you excited!
If you still feel like you need that step by step guidance you can reach out to me for a private coaching session or download this “70 Pro Tips To Get Back With Your Ex” to help you get back with your ex and work towards the happier you.
Don’t let this get you down. Everyone has gone through and even survived after being broken up with so now is the time to let your hair down, be free, be confident, be positive, and know that you still have a chance.
I wish you the best!
Your expert on getting your ex back and getting over a breakup,
Alexandre CORMONT
I Know We Are Meant To Be!
Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love... for good!