One of the most common reasons behind breakups is codependency. You can easily get too comfortable in a relationship, lose your sense of self, lose track of your personal life, and allow your happiness to depend on your partner. The problem of course is that this gives rise to a sizable imbalance in your relationship. Your partner can quickly begin to feel suffocated, which then makes them pull away.
Unfortunately, it has resulted in a breakup for you and you are now looking for codependency help. Fortunately however, you have come to the right place. With our team of experts, we have created a platform where you have all the tools you need available to you at your fingertips so that you can turn this thing around and get back together with the person you love most!
Codependency help: How to become more independent
Having a sense of independence in your romantic relationships is one of the most important things. It allows you to have balance, to have confidence, and to have a proper dynamic between you and your partner that enables your relationship to withstand the test of time.
Many of us don’t realize the importance of this until it’s too late… or at least we think it’s too late. I am here to tell you that yes, you can turn this thing around and you can present yourself in a new light to your ex, but in order to do so, you’re going to have to take action.
To give you an idea of how common this problem really is, 70% of breakups occur because of it! So lets take a look at how to undo the damage and make sure that you can conquer this thing once and for all!
Codependency: How to stop it
The biggest problem with codependency is that you are allowing your happiness no rely on someone else. It’s not fair to the person because it’s a huge responsibility that they do not want, and on top of that, it puts a lot of pressure on the relationship.
Relationships are supposed to be fun and exciting – an addition to your life. They aren’t supposed to be the only thing that matters, or something that you absolutely cannot live without. If you approach relationships with a codependent mindset, you’re setting yourself up in a trap. It will change the dynamic between you and the person you love and the relationship will suffer.
So what do you do to stop being codependent?
1. How to stop being codependent: Energy and emotions
When you are struggling with codependency, it can feel very hard to get in control of your emotions. Sometimes the smallest thing can have a huge effect on your mood, and you wind up feeling anxious or depressed.
So the first thing to do is to release all of these negative emotions. Yes, it’s possible and you can start doing it today!
Every single day, I want you to do one thing: Go for a run! And I don’t mean just a light jog… I am talking about going on a rug that leaves you sweating and your heart rate racing. This is how you’re going to begin expelling negative emotions while increasing your endorphins. On top of that, it’s going to boost your self confidence because you will be doing something that you know benefits you, and you will start to see some physical improvements as well. The more you sweat, the more physical and emotional toxins your body and mind release.
Codependency will start to diminish.
2. Fixing codependency: Socializing
One of the best ways to fix codependency is to get yourself out there and start being more social. I encourage you to spend more time with friends, check out new bars, new restaurants, and be open to making more friends.
Try this: give every single person you come across in your day a compliment. It can be the cashier at Starbucks, it could be your assistant, it could be the mailman, anyone! By giving compliments, you’re giving positive energy and that’s exactly what will come back to you.
Little by little, you’re going to start feeling better and more confident. On top of that, the more you socialize, the more gratifying your personal life will become and you will start to feel less dependent on your partner for your happiness. Your self confidence will be growing…
3. Working on your frame of mind to combat codependency
We can control everything that goes on in our minds. It just depends on your willpower to do so!
Right about now, if you’ve been struggling and coping with codependency, you probably have a little voice in your head that’s been telling you that you aren’t enough, that you aren’t confident enough, maybe even that you don’t deserve your ex… It is now time to change what that voice in your head is telling you. From here on out, I want you to repeat to yourself that you deserve the best. You need to be thinking positive thoughts about yourself and you can practice beginning your day with affirmations.
Repeat to yourself that you can have success in your professional life, you can meet more people, you can make more friends, you can be confident, you can love yourself, you can be happy…
Reinforcing positive thoughts is crucial when it comes to overcoming codependency. There is actually a science to this, called Neuro-Linguistic Programming.
4. Always focus on happiness!
Keep in mind that you don’t need to “own” the person that you are with in order to be happy. Otherwise nothing will ever be enough! You’ve got to bring happiness into your own life, so start thinking about how exactly you can bring it into your life in the next ten weeks.
My colleague Coach Alex has an exercise that he has been using with his clients – Take a piece of paper and write down ten things that you can do over the course of the next ten weeks that will make YOU happy.
You have a new activity each week. Some examples are salsa class, getting a deep tissue massage, hiking, yoga, boxing, getting new art supplies, rollerblading on the beach, etc. New activities mean new emotions, and you will be able to begin proposing a new relationship to your ex.
These things need to be incorporated into your life on a daily basis if you want to experience a real change.
How to be emotionally independent and attract the person you love back
As with any process of getting back together with an ex, your self confidence needs to be prioritized. When this happens, everything changes. You will no longer be needy or clingy, you will no longer be at your ex’s beck and call, you will switch your focus away from him or her and onto improving your life… and as all of these things begin to happen, your ex will begin to notice a very attractive shift taking place within you.
For added effect, I encourage you to use one of our most powerful techniques for getting an ex back like the No Contact Rule, which consists of cutting contact for a predetermined period of time.
The goal of this is to create an electroshock in your ex while giving you the opportunity to really become the 2.0 version of yourself that you’re proud of. For more information on how to use the no contact tool and how to make your ex want you back as a result of it, just click the link!
When you start to feel different about yourself, you’re going to start feeling different in your relationships. Not depending on your ex for happiness can reinforce your bond and make your relationship considerably better than ever before.
We are always here to help so please don’t hesitate to get in touch. You can leave your question in the comment section below or reach out to us personally right here. We can guide you from A to Z through this challenging period!
Wishing you all the best in life and love,
Your coach when you’re looking for codependency help
I Know We Are Meant To Be!
Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love... for good!