It is very common for people to breakup but still continue to have sex together. Hooking up on a regular basis despite the fact that your ex has decided to end the relationship can lead to both confusion and frustration.
Many people get stuck in such a situation not knowing how to break the mold one way or the other because of the fear of losing their ex all together; Is it better to make a stand and refuse to continue having sex with them until you get some sort of commitment or should you continue to have intimate moments and hope that your ex change their mind?
In this article we will give you some tips to provide some perspective and clarity; the goal here is to empower you to enable you to come out of a state of fear, to make an educated decision and reclaim your share of the balance of power.
Don’t confuse sex with emotional attachment
It is important for you to understand that maintaining a sexual relationship with an ex does not mean that you are necessarily closer to your goal of ultimately getting back together! It is easy for people to feel as if they are rebuilding a bond with their ex because they are once again sleeping together. Sex simply means that a deep physical attraction still remains between the two of you. This physical attraction can be somewhat independent of the emotional attachment that you are looking to rebuild.
The fact that you still have strong feelings for your ex actually makes the process of sleeping with them quite dangerous. You are more invested than they are and you also have different expectations. You must be really careful and have a game plan to ensure that your actions are thought out. If you are currently going through a similar experience please ensure that you temper your expectations and don’t simply keep going with the flow hoping to see where this experience may lead you.
Try to deeply analyze how these sexual encounters are taking place. Was it a one time incident or are you guys hooking up on a regular basis? Is alcohol playing a part in these encounters or are you sleeping together sober? Taking a step back and figuring out answers to some of these questions can only help you be more aware of the dynamic that you currently engaged in; this will in turn enable you to make the right decisions and put you in the best possible circumstances to get back with your ex.
Use physical intimacy to your advantage
Simply because physical attraction and emotions are not necessarily linked does not mean that you cannot use this intimacy to your advantage in your pursuit to get back with your ex-husband or wife. You must really look to put your best foot forward and make the sexual experiences as pleasurable as possible for both parties.
Try to keep these moments together drama free and positive. Stay away from arguments and breakaway from past conflicts. In essence you should do everything in your power to make every encounter with your ex enjoyable. You will need to display a change in your behavior and overall attitude towards them; if you are able to do so in a positive manner they will slowly start to question whether breaking up was the right move.
Make sure that you stay true to your values
It is of the utmost importance that you do not do things that go against your core beliefs just to please your ex. If you look to change who you are and your essence in the hopes to sway them back, your ex will not only see right through you but will also unconsciously be less attracted to you for not standing up for your beliefs.
Most people are at their finest, and are most attractive when engaged in their passions, hobbies or living in the moment while engaging in something that they are passionate about. You are probably no different. So take our word for it and do what you love to do and take pleasure in doing so. Also do not pretend to be someone you are not just to please your ex.
In some cases you may want to stop and distance yourself
If you no longer represent a challenge for your ex and you are at their mercy or under their thumb we highly recommend that you take some distance and stop sleeping with them all together. You will know that a change is needed if you always say yes when they reach out to you, if you sit by the phone waiting to hear from them or if you are unable to carry out your daily life (work, family or other commitments).
In such cases sleeping together is actually causing you more harm than good and you will have a very difficult time getting your ex to commit to you. Simply put you are offering them the best of what a relationship can bring them without having a voice by letting them set all the ground rules. You are playing a game in which you have no control and you are simply loosing face.
A simple decision like refusing to sleep with them until the relationship is more in tuned with your expectations can alter the dynamic and enable you to regain control. You have to be strong and not let your emotions dictate your actions. In order to get your ex to commit to you, you will have to force them out of their comfort zone; force them to make a choice. Either the rules of the game change or they risk losing you forever. In order for this to work out in your favor you must also not fear losing them and be willing to let go. You will need to have discipline and be extremely patient to give them time to miss you and ultimately want to be with you. This can be the key to getting back with your ex if you are still having sex with them.
Take control
Realize that you remain in control of your destiny through your choices and your actions. You can thus dictate or at the very least have a say in how your relationship will ultimately shape out. Do not live in fear and do not be reactive in regards to your ex. Use this physical intimacy to your advantage, understand the intricacies of your present situation and stay true to your core values. Ultimately you may have to distance yourself to engage in a new dynamic in order to change the outcome in your favor and get back with your ex.
If you are still sleeping with your ex and are looking to seal the deal and get back into an exclusive long term relationship with them please share your thoughts or questions in the comments section below. Our team of coaches will answer your comments and guide you in the right direction!
Your coach to help you get back with your ex if you are still having sex together,
Adrian
97 Responses
Hello me in my ex started back talking this yr in may everything was good between the too of use until we started having sex. I started finding things out in he kept coming back he got engaged in still was around. We’ve had a differences in the past when we dated but since we just been friends in having sex things have realllh changed. We talk about the past every time we’re together. We tell each other how we love care still have feelings protect pray for each other. But its just the sex I think is tearing use apart I asked him how long could he go without he said tbh he can’t in he don’t know in don’t know why . I just need some help on our behalf.
Hey Diamond,
Sorry it took so long to get back to you, I was preparing a 3 day conference in France. Right now your ex has the best of both worlds, and no incentive to commit. He already has everything that he could wish for, without having to make you his. You need to pull back and to force his hand…either he will lose you for good or he needs to make it official. Nothing will change unless you are strong enough to pull away. Stop having sex and see where is heart truly lies.
Don’t hesitate to reach out to me if need be.
Best,
Adrian
Hi, me and my ex broke up two months or so ago and have slept together a few times since then. We also speak to each other quite a lot during the week as he claims he wants to be friends and doesn’t want to loose me completely. He will sometimes start a new conversation with me when I tell him I’ll speak to him another time and will get me gifts from his holidays. Sometimes I can’t work out his behaviour towards me as one day he will be pally with me and sometimes he ignores me. I want to see where his heart lies with me but i don’t want to loose him completely just yet. I was thinking of starting no contact for a month or so to see if he speaks to me in between and wants to be in my life.
Hey Jade, you don’t have to go with a complete No contact, just make him chase you a bit and show him that he is no longer a priority. You don’t even need to stop sleeping with him to be honest, only to make sure that you do so on your own time and that you are more detached than he is. You can even go as far as hint that you are dating other people in order to confront him with the fear of loss…. he will start to do everything to make you his.
Good luck!
Adrian
Hi, my ex and I broke up almost 2 months ago. After the breakup we ended up getting an apartment together so now we are living together. I dont talk about the break up with him bc it makes him angry for some reason. He is the one who ended the relationship but he is also the one who suggested the apartment. We still sleep together on a regular basis. We spend our free time together unless he is with friends. He still will refer to me to co workers and family as his gf and doesnt correct anyone when they call me his gf. He makes jokes when he sees old couples that it is us in the future. But then he will still say we are broken up when i try to talk about it. I’m very confused and dont know how to get him fully back. I need help!
Hey Jessi,
You can’t let him have his cake and eat it too! You need to take control and stop accepting the status quo out of fear of losing him.
Please book a coaching session in order for me to help you turn things around and to get him to commit!
Sincerely,
Adrian
How do i go about booking a coaching session?
Here you go: https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Hi there, me and my ex broke up three weeks ago, of a year relationship. We started talking again last night. I texted him first. A few days ago, we were chatting about how great our sex was and then he told me he just want sex from me and said “I don’t want anything more at this stage”. We will meet up just for sex, no other expectation. We are in long distance and basically he said we will be flying to see each other, just to have sex. I was hurt. He knows that I have other expectations from him. And he knows that I’m dying to meet him, to be honest i don’t care about sex, just want to be in his arm. Who will spend hundreds of dollars just to have sex with ex to whom he does not have feeling anymore? I don’t know what to do. I want him back and seems like he has no feeling for me whatsoever. Do you see any chance of getting back together. Please advise me!
Hey lady,
Thanks for sharing your story.
If I were you I would distance myself from him and turn down this request to meet just for sex. You have to value yourself and be the strong one. He is clearly still very attracted to you if he is willing to jump on a plane just to sleep together. Use that to your benefit and to become a challenge to him once again. You are the prize, make sure that you value yourself as such! He can’t have his cake and eat it too.
Be strong, control your emotions and the urge to reach out and he will come back around!
Sincerely,
Adrian
My ex and I broke up 6 months ago.we lived together until July and continue to have sex..it was weekly until he met this girl 4 weeks ago..because I snooped..I know she hasn’t slept with him…yet..when they first got together.he started telling me we shouldn’t be hanging out to much..but after 3 weeks of NO sex with him..he has come back to me for sex..he still hangs with her and calls her babe..but no sex with her..I want her to know he cis still having sex with me..bad idea?
Bad idea!
Let’s work together to turn things around.
Sincerely,
Adrian
Hey coach Adrian..since my last post..we are still having weekly sex..today he texted me that he feels like I still want to be a couple but it’s not gonna happen..I told him I moved on and have been dating…his reply..glad to hear that.maybe we can get together sooner than Wednesday…is he testing me?jealous?..or was he expecting another response?..I want him back…ps..he claims “she” is not his girlfriend..otherwise he wouldn’t spend time with me
I think that he is pushing your buttons and knows that you are still after him. Book a coaching session in order for us to really put the right actions in place so that you can win him back.
Hi there, my boyfriend and I are 23 and have been together for 6 years with a 2 year old son. We ARE best friends, even he said it. He said he enjoys my company and seeing his son at home, but doesn’t know what he wants in life because we settled down so early. He now is regretting not sleeping with more women and “partying like his friends tell him stories about”. He left almost 2 weeks ago, and because of our son we have constant contact, we are civil, intent on trying to be friends and for my sake trying to get him back. I love our family and don’t want any of this. I’ve tried balancing keeping distance and letting him talk to me first, and not pushing him for answers, but the other night I told him it might be fun to be friends with benefits, and we slept together. I’ve been back and forth with if this was a good idea.
What’s the best route for me to take to keep my family together? He still from time to time says he still doesn’t know what he wants and that’s why he left, because its “not fair to me for him to be half committed”.
Help ?
Hey Hannah,
There is a lot for us to work with here.
Please book a session in order for us to get to work and get it done!
Sincerely,
Adrian
I’m in almost the same exact situation …I’d like some help and the same advice you’d give Hannah
Hello.
My ex and i broke up 5months ago.
We tried to get back together after a month or so but the arguing was still present so we distanced ourselves and had a few weeks without speaking. We are back to chatting almost every day. He is very busy and said he does not have time for a relationship with me or anyone currently. I have made it clear that i understand he doesnt see a future and he has corrected me its just right now. We both havent slept with anyone else and have been thinking of casually sleeping with one another.
He said hes unsure as he does not want me to get attached or hurt. Will sleeping with my ex be a bad idea until he is ready for more or am i fooling myself? Help please.
Hey Emma,
If you are still very attached it could be very dangerous to sleep with him. You could get very emotional and push him away.
Reach out to me in order for us to figure out an alternative plan and win him back without having to put you in a vulnerable situation by sleeping together.
Regards,
Adrian
Hi
My ex and I broke up 2 weeks ago and we tried not talking at all, however we could only go two days without talking. He broke up with me because he said he is unhappy in his life right now and that he has to figure his life out and that he doesnt want to drag me down too. He says he still loves me. I still love him to. He just got tired of us fighting lately and thinks we are too different. However I still wanna be with him. I just am confused on what to do. We talked and I asked him if he wants to hang out and be friends and have sex sometimes. He said he doesnt want to do that because he doesn’t wanna make it harder for either of us, but I convinced him to hang out with me. We started having sex and hanging out. He has been worried that we both won’t be able to move on if we continue to do this. I told him that I still want him in my life and he said he still wants me in his. He just doesn’t understand why I can have sex with him without feeling guilty. He told me that me having sex with him confuses him and he wants to have sex but is worried it will make it hard for him and me in the future. I wanna be with him. I wanna get back together with him I just dont know how. I have tried everything.
Hi
My ex and I broke up 2 weeks ago and we tried not talking at all, however we could only go two days without talking. He broke up with me because he said he is unhappy in his life right now and that he has to figure his life out and that he doesnt want to drag me down too. He says he still loves me. I still love him to. I just am confused on what to do. We talked and I asked him if he wants to hang out and be friends and have sex sometimes. He said he doesnt want to do that because he doesn’t wanna make it harder for either of us, but I convinced him to hang out with me. We started having sex and hanging out. He has been worried that we both won’t be able to move on if we continue to do this. I told him that I still want him in my life and he said he still wants me in his. He just doesn’t understand why I can have sex with him without feeling guilty. He told me that me having sex with him confuses him and he wants to but is worried it will make it hard for him in the future. I wanna be with him. I wanna get back together with him I just dont know how. I have tried everything.
Hello Adrian,
Me and my ex have been together for 9 months. We broke up about a month ago. When we were together everything was perfect. My ex however has very bad communication skills where he never called or text me first. For the a little bit I thought he was cheating on me but then one day I was able to crack into his phone and found out he was talking to nobody… what a relief. I comfront him about his bad communication skills but got mad at me and told me that he has already give me enough attention and he doesn’t need to baby me 24/7… Before I dated him I was with a different ex and I lived with him. I left that ex for my current ex. I moved out of my ex house 3 months later due to money issues. I never cheated. One day out of the blue my ex2 (lets call him ex2 and the guy who broke up with me is ex1) texted me. We been texting each other and start catching up. Then we got closer but as friends. I started hanging out with ex2. At first I will tell ex1 that I was going to hang out with ex2 but everytime I do he gets very upset and we argue. It got so bad that ex1 will give me a curfew whenever I go to ex2 house. I never cheated. We’re literally just friends. I started lying to ex1 about where I’m going… I feel awful about it but I do it because I don’t want to upset him. Months later we broke up. I never understand why we broke up. One day I was taking a vacation and accidently left my phone. I called ex1 and asked him to bring my phone over at the airport. Ex1 broke into my phone and read ALL of my text messages with me and ex2. He read all of the rants I said about ex1, read all the plans I made with him, saw all photos of ex1 (vacation photos when we used to date), he looked through my download history, he looked through my browser history. Everything. He confronted me and started crying. I lied to him… I told him I was sorry for lying. He told me the truth why he broke up with me. He told me he felt like I was never his. I cried really hard. Out of anger. I was angry because when we were together I was always by his side and give him the most affection. I would go out of my way for him but yet he won’t do the same. I do so much for ex1 and it hurt to be told I don’t noticed your work. There’s numbers of time I would cancel plans with ex2 just to hang out with ex1. Numbers of time. I planned theropy for us.
Last week he came over for theropy. It was the first time I saw him. We went to my room and had sex. We end up not going to theropy. He stayed for 2 nights. We had sex a total of 12 times. I felt my boyfriend again. When we have sex we would kiss a lot and look into each other eyes and say I love you. Afterwards we cuddle and watch a movie. I wanted my boyfriend back more than anything. I thought doing this was the key to come back. He went home.
I called and ask how is he doing. He told me he hated every second we have sex and every time we do he wants to bang his head against the wall. I cried and ask him why did he do it. He told me it was a distraction. I asked him why did you look at me in the eye and say I love you. He told me its because it remind him of our goodtime and he misses it from the bottom of his heart… I cried and I feel emotionally distress. I think about him everyday even before he came over. He told me lets stop having sex and I feel awful because everytime I have sex with him I feel our emotional connection. Like things were the way they used to be. He told me he didn’t wanted to go to the theropy anymore. I bawled. He confronted me with my last lie. I lied to him that I was going to visit my family up north. He caught my lie and found out that I was flying over to a concert with ex2. He than hang up and I have been broken ever since. Im lost and I don’t know what to do. I love my ex from the bottom of my heart. Even before we broke up. I want to hold him again like we used too…
My ex and I were together for 7 months, and broke up 11 days ago. I suggested still sleeping together and so we get together every couple days. He stays for a while, naked and cuddling me, and we talk about what each other is up to. It still feels there is a really strong connection, but he had broken up with me because he doesn’t feel as strongly for me as I do for him. What should I do?
Hello! Its been 6 months since my ex and I have seen each other. My ex and I have been together for 2 years, with a 4 month break in the middle of that because I was an ass. But, we were together a year after that and I moved to Califnoria and he went to college in Minnesota. The last month before we were moving we were both trying to spread ourselves out between seeing our family, friends and each other. I was getting very stressed out about the long distance thing. Him and I have been inseparable since the day I met him. I panicked about a week before I moved and ended things, within about 4 hours after ending I asked for him back. But he was to distressed and overwhelmed. So I moved to cali and he went to college, their are occasional conversations over text atlas twice a month to catch up. We snapchat. Ive been in love with him this whole time and have gotten signs from God that I asked for. My heart keeps telling me to not let go and hold on and wait. So thats what I did. About a week ago I came back to FL and he asked to see me, we have a very strong physical attraction and when I got to his house it was like we had never broken up. We were laughing so hard and making jokes. He was calling me baby and kissing my forehead. The sex was amazing, we never went to sleep. He came over last night and he seemed like he had a lot on his mind. He was quiet at first and just kissing me and rubbing my skin. I put on Kung Fu panda when we were having sex and we stopped to watch bc we love it… lol. and then we had sex after the movie and cuddled until we fell asleep. He calls me baby and I know in my heart he’s feelings are there. But why doesn’t he wanna say it. We had a beautiful relationship and didn’t end on bad terms. He says one thing and then acts another way. Can someone please help… I want to marry this man haha. Could it be because he goes back to college so far away??? Is it me??
Hi Alexis,
Thank you for your share. I’m sorry to hear about the situation you’re in, I know how tricky it can be when you’re determining how to get an ex back if you’re still having sex and in your case, are also living far apart from one another. At this stage in your lives, it’s normal to feel confusion about what to do. You’re young, in college, and a newfound freedom, but are also in love with your ex from back home. This can’t be any easier for him than it is for you (men just express things differently). I think that there’s no need to rush into something right now; focus on yourself and the rest will fall into place. It’s clear he still loves you. During this time, though, I encourage you not to sleep with him – it’s important that he knows that you aren’t a vacation experience and being with you means being with all of you.
I hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Coach N.
Hi. Me & my ex have hooked up 5 times now. We were dating and it was really good. All of a sudden she broke up with me saying her feelings had changed. It was really confusing because just a week ago she couldnt get enough of me. We never slept together while dating but a week after we broke up we met up to “talk” ended up hooking up & now we have done it a few times. Come to find out she was a virgin!! Im so confused i still have feelings for her & never have done this!!!
Hi, so my ex and I just broke up last week, we’ve been together for 4 years. Everything is fine but the only thing that was missing is that I kinda went into a dry spell in the bedroom, now that’s over & im basically just regretting that I let that ruin us. But we’ve been flirty & talking & even sexting & he’s commented multiple times about how he wished I was like that before we ended things & ive been more open about sex & upfront with what I like etc & so we’ve agreed to be friends with benefits no strings attached but my ultimate goal is to show him that we are still very good together because that was literally the only issue between us. I feel like it’ll work because I’m not changing myself I’m just realizing what I’ll be loosing & I don’t want that & he is the one person who I find so attractive. & we both still love each other so I can’t see how it won’t work, it’s like sneakily fixing the part that’s wrong & eventually he’s gonna relax we can be together happily & have a good sex life
Hi, so my ex and I just broke up last week, we’ve been together for 4 years. Everything is fine but the only thing that was missing is that I kinda went into a dry spell in the bedroom, now that’s over & im basically just regretting that I let that ruin us. But we’ve been flirty & talking & even sexting & he’s commented multiple times about how he wished I was like that before we ended things & ive been more open about sex & upfront with what I like etc & so we’ve agreed to be friends with benefits no strings attached but my ultimate goal is to show him that we are still very good together because that was literally the only issue between us. I feel like it’ll work because I’m not changing myself I’m just realizing what I’ll be loosing & I don’t want that & he is the one person who I find so attractive. & we both still love each other so I can’t see how it won’t work, it’s like sneakily fixing the part that’s wrong & eventually he’s gonna relax we can be together happily & have a good sex life
Hi SK,
Thank you for your share. I know how tricky it can be when trying to get back with your ex if you are still having sex. The goal here is to show him how you’ve evolved, without jeopardizing your standards. Don’t let him think he can just use you for sex for now. It may change his overall perspective of you. I encourage you to consider booking a session with either Adrian or I so we can help! Let us know what you think.
Sincerely,
Coach N.
Hello …I’m dealing with something way different but my ex boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me 8 months ago and started dating someone new he tells me that they fight everyday and their new relationship is exactly like our old relationship same problems the thing is I don’t want him back because I have slept with him a few times after the break up and every time I felt bad about myself I have a new boyfriend now and he is amazing & he loves me and respects me so much but we in a long distance relationship & sometimes I feel lonely now I wanna stop sleeping with my ex I wanna move on but I still wanna be friends … A week ago my ex called me telling me that he loved me and wanted me back and wanted to meet i refused but i saw him just yesterday and we had sex but we have disconnected again I don’t know what to do because I still love having sex with him
Hi Zammie, thank you for your share. I know how tricky these situations can be, especially if you’re still having sex with your ex. I think you deserve to take some time to really figure out who you value and what you want to do. Follow your instinct. If you keep them both, you’ll be setting yourself up for a major headache later on down the line. If you need help with this, I invite you to book a session with Adrian or myself.
Sincerely,
Coach N.
Hi
I have a huge problem
My bf broke up with me 8 months ago
We were together for 4 years
We have been fighting ever since
We still see each other
But now
Our sex is better than it ever was
He does things to me he hasn’t before
He gives oral from the front all the way to the back ( he doesn’t do that and he is picky he wouldn’t do it to just anyone)
That makes me confused because he gave me oral two times in 4 years
Now he’s doing it all the time and being super freaky with me
When we talk afterwards it seems ok for a while but then he gets upset over stupid random things and we both go off on each other
He starts to get worried when I say I should just date if u don’t want to commit
At first he says go right ahead but a couple days later he will ask to hang out
Asks if I actually seen another man
I tell him no
And we always sleep together
How can I make it official
Is he just having sex and doing new things with me to keep me from sleeping with someone else?
I’m just really confused and I don’t know what to do
Hi Mina,
Thank you for your share. I know how tricky it can be when trying to get back with an ex if you’re still having sex! However, to optimize your chances, I do encourage you to stop engaging intimately for a bit. He needs to know that he can’t just have you for sex. If he wants to sleep with you, he needs to be willing to commit to you. If you need help finding how to communicate this, I am here to support you.
Sincerely,
Coach N.
Hello. I was married to my ex husband for 28 years. We divorced 8 months ago and I was devadated, He now has a new girlfriend buto he still has sex with me. We have 3 children together and it crushed our family has been crushed. He has moved on with his girlfriend and I have started dating; however we are still having sex. The guy that I am dating knows that I am still having sex with my ex husband but he looks at it positively with the mindset that I “need to get him out of my system” I still love my husband tremendously and am so confused as to who is in my future. Please advise.
Hi Val,
Thank you for your share. I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but if you’re wondering how to get back with your ex if you are still having sex, the best way is to STOP having sex. If your husband knows he can come to you for sex but then explore a life with another person, he won’t have the sense of urgency to return to you. I encourage you to book a session with me, I’d love to help you resolve this and develop a plan.
Sincerely,
Coach N.
My ex dumped me four days before my birthday and I was devastated the first few weeks… its been three weeks now and we message each other everyday… he said he is unhappy with himself because he gained weight and wanted to know what career path to chose in life…. he came over a few nights ago and I asked him to stay over… he mentioned he was feeling very confused and then one thing lead to another… we still have feelings with each other I just don’t know what to do…
Hi please help !!! So me and my ex broke up a year ago.he dumped me . I did the no contact rule and we were broken up for 6 months we finally got back in contact and everytnkng was going great he backed away a bit in the middle and said he needed space but I handled it pretty well , then we shortly picked up were we left off expect we don’t say I love u anymore it’s slowed down a bit so we hung out 4 times now and the last time he said he’s not ready for the relationship yet but we ended up having sex I know I messed up so bad but it was only one time do I have any chance of getting him back and I’ve come all this way i really want him and I know I should cut off all sex should I dissapear for a while ? What are my chances and should I stop kissing to will he know that I’m serious about not giving it up anymore until he commits SHOHLD I say it was a mistake or I don’t regret it pleaseeeeee help
Hi Jenna,
Thank you for your share and your questions are very valid ones to have. However, in order to assess, I’m going to need to know a bit more about your situation. I invite you to book a session with me and I can help you. I have faith in your situation and believe you can rectify this.
Sincerely,
Coach N.
Hi, my name is Leah and my ex and I have been off and on for six month And we love each other He’s Egyptian and I’m Puerto Rican which complicates the relationship since we are a lot and don’t see things eye to eye!!!! the last time we broke up it was for good we stop talking for a month!!! It broke me. We reconnected we have sex and it’s intesnse to the point that he’s holding me knocked out sleeping through the night. we have fun together we don’t argue and things are great. I want my baby back
So please help me !!!!!!
Hi, So my ex girlfriend and i started having sex after being broke up for about 5 months. We stayed pretty good friends during the no sex period. Now the tricky part is we are both Christian, and didn’t have sex for the majority of the time we were together. ( We did at the beginning of our relationship but stopped.) We both believe that sex should be saved for marriage but neither of us were virgins when we started dating. I really like her and want to get back together. ( she was the one who broke it off) Now the tricky thing is we are sleeping together and our fine with it. But i know that if we were to get serious again that aspect would have to stop. So my questions is how can we transition from sleeping together with no stings attached, To dating again and not sleeping together. Very confusing to understand i know. But because of our beliefs that is basically how this would have to be.
Thank you for your time.
Hi Ryan,
Thank you for reaching out. I know how tricky this must be. I feel that if this is truly what you both value, the transition should be OK. If she’s not as excited by this idea, then maybe it can be more challenging. I can help you communicate these ideas to her in a way that can maximize your chance at getting back together. I invite you to book a session with me.
All the best!
Coach N.
Hi! So back in December my ex kind of started seeing another girl but he didn’t even tell me. We officially broke up in July but we’re still seeing each other but not officially together and I thought we are going to get back together. We had one fight and then I guess that led him to see another girl. ( he’s been friends with this girl for eight years and she claims to have always cared about him and everything which I knew was just BS to sleep with him because she tried sleeping with him when we were together) she also had a serious bf during that time. They dated for like two months and then when they broke up and I realize he started to try and get my atension through social media and things like that. but even when he was dating her he would still always be all over my social media ( sending me weird signs saying he misses me or loves me or something) and he didn’t even follow me on anything. Once we ran into each other at a bar while he was dating her but she wasn’t there and he came up to me and then we started talking about once we ran into each other at a bar while he was dating her but she wasn’t there and he came up to me and then we started talking about “us” and I confronted him saying I know he still misses me and loves me and I told him how I love him and he started tearing up and I confronted him saying I know he still misses me and loves me and I told him how I love him and he started tearing up. And now we’re back in each others lives and we’re having sex but he told me that he doesn’t love me anymore and he doesn’t want to go back together. But his actions don’t match his words. He does things that make me think that he still loves me and wants me and I can tell he gets jealous if he sees me with another guy or something. And he knows how I feel about him. I want to get back with him but I just don’t know what to do. Even though I should just believe him when he says he doesn’t love me and doesn’t want me back and I should just end this all together, for some reason I just can’t believe it because his actions show otherwise. It’s almost like he’s trying to stop himself from falling in love with me again. And when we have sex he doesn’t talk to me for days. And he’s never been someone to sleep with someone who he doesn’t pursue. He’s never done that
Hi Sherry! Thank you for your share and I’m sorry about what’s going on! It seems pretty frustrating! I encourage you to make him miss you a little bit – this can really be advantageous for you! If you need help with what to do, I am confident I can help you turn it around. I invite you to book a session with me.
All the best!
Coach N.
My ex and I broke up jan 2016 and have been sleeping together off nd on since june 2016. When we do see each other he is sweet and says things like “youre not the only one with feelings at stake here” “im not seeing anyone ok” cuddles at night etc but on the other hand there is no movement of any kind. Mixed messages are buggin. What the heck do i do?
Hi Jenny,
It sounds to me like you have to take a step back from the relationship so you can re-enter it with different parameters. Right now, it’ll be hard to kickstart the path out of limbo. I invite you to book a session with me. I can help you.
Wishing you the best,
Coach N.
Hi , so my ex and I broke up 3 years ago and it took a really big toll on me I was always the one to like him a little less until the break up when it hit me like a wall. We are friends with each other so we are always around one another and that’s what made it more difficult. Two months after the break up we started fooling around with each other again and it’s sadly still going on randomly. In the past we kept it a big secret from our friends but since these last 2 times he has been more open about it.which had me excited maybe he liked me more and maybe it was gonna lead to us being together again. But when one of my friends confronted me about one of our hook ups, she threw out a secret on how sneaky he was when he used to hook up with another girl and no one knew. Sad thing is when she said that, it was the first I ever heard about them. I was crushed all the times I thought we were just sneaking around he would sneak around with another girl. When I confronted him on the incident he only responded that they hadn’t have talked in “like 2 years”. Well now the girl no longer has a boyfriend (not like it stopped him before), my guess is he’d drop me for her in a second. So my question is should I just cut him off even though we were making process and wecouldvr gotten back together or should I just quit while I’m a head.
Hi Sam,
Thank you for your share and I’m glad you reached out. In my opinion, if you want to start it over, then you need to start it over. If you’re already bringing up something that bothered you from two years ago, you’re relationship is already starting off on the wrong foot. Think of how much you’ve changed in two years. Is it possible that he has too? I think you’d gain a lot of insight in a one-on-one, and I really invite you to book a session with me. Adrian and I can help you set this straight.
All the best!
Coach N.
My ex and I have been broken up for six months shortly after she had a boyfriend . they ended it three weeks ago. Now I find myself doing nice things for her. I see her everyday as well because the schedule we have for our kids. Lately I’ve been spending the night a lot and having sex with her. She says she loves me but is not in love with me and doesn’t want to ever get back because she feels like she gave me enough time to see what I can offer and she don’t want it. something else s out their. What should I do? We been together for 8 years by the way.
Hi Charles,
Thank you for your share and I’m sorry to hear about your current situation. I feel like sleeping with her isn’t the best idea – as this is her being able to have her cake and eat it too. In order to maximize your chances of getting back together, you’ll have to re-strategize. I invite you to book a coaching session with me or Coach Adrian, we can develop a game plan for you to get her back.
Best,
Coach N
Hey Hi we were in relationship for 5years but 2months back my boyfriend fought with me and he left..breakup..I tried contacting him begged he never turned up to..After 2 months 2 days back he messaged me saying that he will speak to me but he will never love or marry me..he just wanna flirt and have sex with me..He just wants sexual pleasure from..Can I make x love me again by having sex with him
Hi Benita,
Thank you for your share. If sex is your only card right now, I would be careful with how you use it. If you want to develop a gameplan to get him back, with or without sex, I can help you. I invite you to book a session with me.
Best,
Coach N
My ex and I broke up after 12 years about a month ago. We do have kids so I do see him. He started dating somebody from his work about four weeks after we split up it was all his decision to split up. He says he does miss me and he does think about me sometimes. Every time we meet so he can see my child he initiates sex. I think he’s in a rebound relationship but I want the love of my life back so what do I do? I need help please help me.
Hi Zoe
Thank you for reaching out to me and for sharing your story.
There are no guarantees here, as your situation is a complex one…but I do believe that I can help you maximize your chances of making it work – and I do think that it is possible to turn everything around.
I would recommend that you book a one hour private coaching session in order for me to respond to all of your questions, provide you with insights and a clear way forward.
I sincerely hope to hear from you soon.
Coach N.
Hey Leanne,
Thanks for reaching out.
I can’t help you in this way because I work a bit differently than most coaches. I like to understand all the intricacies of a given situation before providing insights and to make sure I provide you with the most appropriate way forward based on your current circumstances.
I know from experience that you need tailored support and a list of concrete steps to take to reach your goal. To get there we’ll need to dedicate time and interact in the most optimal way possible to have the desired results and truly maximize your chances of success.
To that end, I invite you to book a coaching session with me (1h00 hour would be the most ideal). After that it will be easier for me to continue to provide you with advice via email, but for now you’ll understand that it’s a bit difficult for me to advise you appropriately without knowing every relevant detail of your story.
Here is the link to book a coaching session:
https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
I promise to speak to you as soon as possible after you complete your booking. The goal of this session will be for us to asses where you truly stand and to provide you with a clear road map to get back together…
I wish you all the very best.
Speak soon,
Coach Natalie
My ex and I broke up in Feb 2017 after almost 4 years, and then got back together briefly for about 2 months before he broke up with me again. We didn’t have any good communication for weeks after that and then one day we decided to talk and ended up sleeping together. This has been going on now for almost 2 months now. I want to get back together more than anything and I have made that very clear to him. We both have slept with other people, I am no longer sleeping with someone else but he is. I can’t understand why he still wants to have sex with me and someone else. I should also mention that we do hang out and don’t always have sex when we do. Him and I are in almost constant contact with each other, and when it seems like he is coming around and I say something to him about getting back together, he freaks out and gets angry and tells me that he’s not on the same page. I really love him more than anything. I have tried to move on, I’ve gone on dates, etc etc… but at the end of the day he’s all I think about. I don’t want to cut off sleeping with him because in a pathetic way, I’m okay with taking what I can get and being with him in any way possible. It seems like if I make no mention of our relationship then things are fine between us but as soon as i start to question it, he pulls the rug out from underneath me and reminds me that he still doesn’t want to commit. At one point we both agreed to just see what happens. He claims I need to change and that it annoys him that I ask about us so often but I can’t help it because sometimes he makes me feel like he really does miss being with me. Part of me feels like if I continue this and go with the flow he may come around eventually but another part of me feels like I’m breaking my own heart and that I’m stuck in a chemical romance with him. I don’t want to pressure him to be with me, I know he needs to make that decision on his own but I just don’t know if I should cut off contact for a while. Him and I have never gone longer than a few days with out reaching out to one another. I really feel like we have a deep connection and can’t stay away from each other. He has threatened to take sleeping together off the table when I get emotional but he never does. And anytime I need him, he’s there. I don’t know whats going on. I’m really confused and I need help figuring out the best way to get him back and to commit to me.
Hi Amber,
Thank you for your share. It seems to me like you’re subconsciously pressuring him into making a decision, and this is pushing him away. There are specific things you can do to re-attract him. I can help you. I invite you to schedule a session with me and we can get started right away: http://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching
By the way, congrats on being a mommy to be! I hope everything is going well.
Best,
Coach N.
Hi I broke up with my ex after 17 years almost a month ago, we have two kids not married but do live together due to financial difficulty….I broke up with him due to cheating on me 3 times and the relationship was going dead..but that is all me…..we had the no contact zone only spoke to each other if had too..he was very short with me and as if he wanted to start a fight but i calmly spoke back to him….until last week now we are talking to each other as if we are friends…..we have had sex about 5 times since the break up I am mentally en emotionly good with this…I have never felt like this before or while we were in a relationship…why now when I see him I wanna touch him and have crazy sex with him when I see him I get butterflies and my heart races I cannot really tell if its falling in love again cause I dont have that WOW in me…it there something wrong with me…? I would like to get back together with him there is a part of me that really loves him but like I said I dont have any feelings about us after sex that might break me down…I have told him that I forgive him again that is how much I love this guy….how can I ask him were we stand without sounding desprate or push him away….I started going for counciling to forget my past and get everything out of my head that was killing me now I am almost 100% better than I used to be and started been more confident about myself, losing weight for myself not for him…
What can I do I really regret the break up when we talk to each other he tells me how much money he has saved for “move”…How can I stop this before its over…..he ask me if or when he has a new girlfriend and he maybe fetches the kids and there is a chance to have sex am I will…I said not if he has a gfriend cause I dont want her to go through what I did…he said to me that he is actually dispointed that I said no….why….
Hope u understand all this…
Anonamus Please just call me T
Here’s the short side of the story, me and my ex were together for 3 months before he decided to break thibgs off. The reasoning behind it? He says it’s because he’s not too sure if he can handle being in a relationship right now considering he has other “important” things to take care of regarding money issues so he can have some peace of mind. The very few month she we were together was nothing but positive, we got along so well as we can relate to a lot of thing, no arguing, minor disagreements here and there but that’s what communication was for. Rewind to June 4th when the break up took place he did manage to let me know that nothing has changed and he’s still here for me, same respect, love and all, just again he has other things that need to get done before staying committed to someone, especially me for instance. Back in July I decided to go ahead with No Contact considering it was me who was starting up the conversations every time after the fact we were no longer together. We went for a month without talking to one another and about a little after 30 days he decided to text me. At this point it seems as if the connection is still the same between us. About a couple later after reaching out he picked me up from a party I went to this past Saturday and let me spend the night at his place. Mind you, we haven’t seen each other since May before meeting up early morning of the 13th this month. Everywhere I turned he would be hugging me and everytime it lasted more than an average hug would, it was more than an average hug. It’s like as if we couldn’t get any closer to each other. He then told me he didn’t realize he’d miss me this much. Once we got to his place we slept together in the same bed and wound up actually “sleeping together.” He would throw in a few comments that were kind of hard on me considering after some time I’ve realized I really do love him. He went ahead and stated that “even though we aren’t together anymore the sex between us is still amazing.” He then even jokingly said asking about us getting married and having a kid. And sex wasn’t the only thing that was involved. It was him still calling me babe and kissing me even when we weren’t being intimate, him holding me and wanting to cuddle. I’m just left confused and frusterdated in a way. It’s as though he doesn’t want to commit but everything that goes on between us is still the same as when we were together, again without us having the title of being in a relationship. I also mentioned that I’ll be moving soon within the next month or so, he asked if I could move closer to where he is considering we’re about an hour apart. He asked to stay in touch. Later on that day we texted and he mentioned again of how great the sex was and asking me if we’re going to continue seeing each other again more often and continue having sex. I just don’t know what to do at this point and am left in the dark, should I continue to ride things out in hopes he realizes how strong of an attraction we still hold? Some words say something and other words says other things along with actions. I’m just wanting us to work out for the better again and him deciding maybe we should give this another go.
I broke up with my ex 7 months ago.. we have been scarecely in touch and bumped twice in each other, months ago. However, last Sunday we bumped into a pub together and spend the night with other friends having laugh and dancing. When my friend left my ex and I starting kissing quite a lot and passionately. We ended up going back to his Had great sex and i the morning he suggesting cathing up for drinks the following week. Which is actually in 8 days mininmum because the bank holiday. He suggested again on parti g that he would call for drinks next week. What do I do if he doesnt? Hes leaving at the end of that week for a 10 day back home holiday…
Hi Roquette,
Thank you for reaching out and I’m sorry to hear about your current situation – I now that this is tough! In order to help, though, I’m going to need to know a few things about you and about him. I invite you to schedule a coaching session with me, so we can make a game plan that will work : http://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching
I hope to connect!
Best,
Coach N
Thanks Natalie, I am more than happy to get the package with email and package but Im worried on email wont suffice. I could only find unlimited email one but it is very expensive, Have you not an inbetween one where I could get more email and support but less expensive as the unlimited one?
Like a tailered one..? Maybe with just chat support?
Me and my ex broke up a month and a half ago and we had been snap chatting every day since but still had fights when either of us would get with someone else. Then one day he came over and we had sex and a few days later he said he missed me and wished we met when he had his life together so we knew we still loved each other and then he came over 5 more times and our feelings were still growing so I said we should get back together or stop talking all together and he didn’t want to stop talking but said he wasn’t in a position to say let’s get back together. He had sent me a few messages I haven’t replied to them but I am
Very tempted
My ex and I are still madly in love. We are having sex, but on his terms because he is also sleeping with other people. He still calls me babe and tells me he loves me. I know I sound stupid, but why he left was because I got on birth control after our second child and lost my sex drive. If we would have sex, I would not stay wet. I have never been with anyone else, and I have never been attracted to anyone but him; therefore, I want to have sex as well because I have been taking estradiol to fix my sex drive. He got into a bad accident a couple years ago and has been going through this mid life crisis ever since. He wants to go out with his friends, party, and live his life. Now that we are broke up he goes from one girl to another, but only focusing on one at a time. I KNOW HE HAS NEVER CHEATED. He left because he didn’t want to cheat. I really want him to just get this all out of his system. He is not going for good girls. He is going for girls who cheat. This new on has a boyfriend. The other girls really don’t bother me because we are not together, and he makes sure he picks ones that can’t be serious. I know he wants to get back together, but he is just not ready to come back. I need to get my family back. Our girls are having a really hard time. What should I do? Not having sex was the problem in the first place and now it is back to being intimate, rough, and passionate. Please help me. Should I wait this out?
Hi Family First,
Thanks for reaching out. I know how painful of a situation you’re in, and I truly empathize. I would give the relationship some space, while you assess your emotional situation. Don’t rush this process. You deserve to think it all through.
Best,
Coach N
My ex just broke up with me last 2 weeks and we are still living together along with our 5 month old baby..he told me he doesn’t love me anymore and doesn’t want to be with me either. His mom told me he’s only hiding his feelings. I’ve tried distancing myself from him and would try to speak to him only about the baby.. I’ve been sleeping on the couch for some nights but he had asked me to sleep on the same bed with him. I still love him so we’ve been sharing the same bed and for some reason he has been pulling me closer to him and cuddles me at night which I love but during the day he acts as if he doesn’t love me or want anything to do with me. Oh and the other thing is that we do have sex every now and then. Do you think he still loves me?
Hi Sarah,
I think that because of your child together, you really have an opportunity to turn this around. Try to spend time assessing what happened in the relationship – when and why did it take a turn away from love? It’s in this answer that you’ll be able to turn your relationship around.
Best,
Natalie
hello so I’m so confused and I don’t know what to do. Me and my ex broke up like 6 months ago, due to his mental health, and the way I was effected by it. However our relationship was perfect up until the last month of it where his depression got the best of us. He told me I wasn’t there for him, and I was overwhelmed, so it ended sort of mutually. Now We’ve been having sex almost every weekend for the past month. Sometimes we are drinking but other times sober. Then I sleep over his house and we wake up in the morning and still act lovey. This is where this gets weird. He’s talking to another girl, it’s a long distance relationship, they met when he went across the country blah blah blah. He video chats with her a lot and her contact in his phone is love. OBVIOUSLY IM SO HURT BY THIS, but I continue to have sex with him bc I don’t want to loose him. i sound so pathetic, and I’ve never even confronted him about her, I only know bc me and my ex have mutual friends. I just don’t know what to do.
Hello, my ex broke up with me a little over 2 months ago now. He broke up with me because he was stressed out and wanted to focus on school and getting himself together.. We did not speak to one another for over a month. I missed him the whole time. But he was the one the break the silence and talk to me again, we caught up and it quickly turned sexual. I think we now have a friends with benefits types situation. I haven’t brought up the past at all and just been presenting my best self whenever he is around. But i would like for us to get back together. I feel like we have a amicable relationship. We didn’t break up over anything serious such as cheating but I’m not sure how to get him back at all without bringing up the past and stuff. I don’t wanna lose him.
Hello Taylor,
Thank you for your comment. I know right now can be extremely confusing and I would invite you to step away and give this some space. I know that may be difficult to hear but you deserve a relationship if you love him. So, taking a step back and focusing on you will show him that you will be putting yourself first. If you need any guidance please dont hesitate to reach out to us. https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Jon,
Thank you for your comment. I would encourage you to do no contact so you can gain the control and also give the both of you some time to think about the future.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Katie,
Thank you for your comment. Does he know that you want to be back with him? I would suggest you opening engage in a conversation to see where he is at but make sure you keep your independence throughout this time.
Best,
WMEA Team
I’m going thru the same situation. . And I have no idea
Hello Beth,
Thank you for your comment. I know right now can be difficult but I invite you to complete a six week no contact. Work on yourself, be more social, show confidence and embrace the time with yourself. This will give your ex something to explore and be curious about.
Best,
WMEA Team
So my ex broke it off with me back in August. He was having an emotional affair with a former Co worker and decided that he wanted to be with her. Thing is, we still live together, even sleep in the same bed. I was sleeping in the couch but about two months ago he asked me to come back to the bed.
About three weeks ago I kicked him out if the bedroom, but after two days he asked to come back to the bedroom. We’ve had sex a half a dozen times since the break up, the latest being last week. He says it’s just sex no feelings.
He refuses to leave the home and move in with his affair partner, and I’m unable to because of financial reasons. I’ve told him I was taking our two girls out of state to live with my mom but he doesn’t want me to.
We were together eight years, and we have two children together. Most of the time he’s nice, like nothing happened, but as soon as I bring up working things out he gets angry.
I’ve tried limited no contact, it just makes him upset. I really want to work things out with him, I love him and don’t want to split our family up. He just won’t leave her, and I’m not sure why.
Everything he does suggests he doesn’t want to really split either, but he constantly tells me he’s done with me. I’m so confused….
Hello Dawn,
Thank you for your share. I do encourage you to stop engaging intimately for a bit. He needs to know that he can’t just have you for sex. If he wants to sleep with you, he needs to be willing to commit to you. If you need help finding how to communicate this, we am here to support you. https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hey I have a confusing situation, me and my ex broke up in August, we were together for 2 years, she started seeing someone else for a little bit got her heart broken, she started talking to me more and kissed once then a week later (yesterday)we had sex, before we did it she said no strings attached were just having sex just to do it and I said yes. After sex I was fine I wasn’t really over thinking about it but she was, she said we shouldn’t be doing it because she cares for me, like she doesn’t like the idea of us in general using each other for just sex, idk if that means she has emotions for me because she just can’t see me as having meaning less sex with. She did say she loves it and doesn’t regret it so at the end of the day she is the one who in a sense got confused about everything after that she was acting weird
Hi Rodrigo,
Depending on the reason for the breakup it can be because she may not want to hurt you. I would encourage you to take her on dates and try new things every date. Also, I would not be intimate anymore until you get the relationship back. I encourage you to show her change through some of your actions so you can get your ex back.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello,
I know this time can be very confusing but I encourage you to show your ex some change and also establish a friendship. Whatever caused the breakup focus on that and develop yourself to change this and show it through actions.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Katelyn,
Thank you for you comment. So, in this particular situation your ex has all the control. You must take control back and this starts with you. Spending time with yourself and putting your feelings first. If you are still in love with him then you shouldn’t be sleeping with him as this is giving him exactly what he wants without a title. I invite you to pull back and go into no contact, work on some self-development, and show that you are being social. You want to do something that will capture his attention and thats going to start with you.
Best,
WMEA Team
Jayson,
I have just the thing for you! https://www.withmyexagain.com/ebooks/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Jane,
Thank you for your share. I know how challenging this can be. In order to salvage this relationship, you’ll need to reset it completely. It’s hard to change the parameters if you stay in contact, because it only reaffirms that breakups don’t mean anything for you both. They’ve lost their impact. If you need help with what to do, I encourage you to book a session with me. https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Max,
At this point I would keep things positive and show her a lot of charisma. I suggest for you to take her out somewhere new every time you take her out on a date and let her reciprocate. Don’t rush into things and take your time.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Amara,
Thank you for your comment. At this point you should stop being intimate with your ex. You know your worth and if you want to have a healthy relationship with him then you have to be stern in setting boundaries.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Tia,
I would give this relationship time and not push things to be serious too soon. Show him value within yourself by showing change and confidence. Men love to see a woman who is comfortable in her own skin and not afraid to be alone. This will be key in making him want you more.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hi! me and my ex broke up 3 month ago. I broke up with him, because i was not attracted to him anymore. Now, i have found out i want him back. When we broke up we agreed to remain friends. Unfortunately, i begged for him back almost two weeks ago, before i discovered this site. We have been sleeping together sometimes, and he still asks me to hang out and asked me out for dinner. He has a crush on another girl and they text eachother a lot, but i sitll love him. He told me he cared about me, but he is not in love with me. He also told me that he did not mind if i find someone new, but he still reaches out to me. What should I do?
Hello Sanne,
I believe this product will help you as it walks you through a step by step process. Right now what is most important is that you show him a change or something new. https://www.withmyexagain.com/audio-ressources/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Rachel,
If you want to be back in a relationship you are going to have to switch the dynamics of the relationship a little bit. Either pull back and be flirty and then possible not be intimate again until you know where you stand. Please reach out to us if you need some guidance around this. https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Dwither,
It seems like you both are taking the steps to get back to where you were. Being open and available to her will help but also by showing a confident, fun, and supportive side to you. Take your time with this and enjoy the moment. I believe meeting with someone at your church to discuss your marriage will continue to help you both to get to your designated path.
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello,
I broke up with my boyfriend around a month ago I went no contact for almost 3 weeks, we talked couple of times through text and he invited me for lunch. After that we had sex, I do love him and want him back and I know this is not the right way. I want to get back to the right way to get him back. I don’t know if I should start no contact again this time for longer or if I should be more distant with him? I really want to get him back the right way.
Hello Geraldine,
Every relationship is different and unique. So without me knowing the context of the relationship and the reason for the breakup through a private coaching session it would be hard for me to give you advice around this. If not contact worked previously I would suggest to do it again. Please reach out to us if you need some tailored advice. https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
WMEA Team
Hello Danielle,
Do not sleep with him again. You being too available is setting you back. I know right now its difficult and your heart is hurting but remain strong and please feel free to surf our LoveAdvice YouTube channel for tailored advice.
Best,
WEMA Team
My wife and i broke up with each other 1 month ago and i moved out. Now we are living together again.and now we are having sex everyday and we have been been living together for a week now. We where married and living together 9 years prior. My ex wife doesn’t believe me when i say i am changing everything. That was hendering our relationship she keeps saying that she doesn’t Believe me. And she says she doesn’t think it will change and she wants to see actions. We also talk everyday and we do everything together like we are still married but we are not back together we clean and cook together. I sleep on the couch everynight. And every time we have sex she never says no. I really want my wife back what can i do i miss being married To her
Hello Mike,
There is something underlining the comment about actions. It seems as though she may not be seeing change on something specific that bothered her in the relationship when you split. I recommend you booking a session with us so I can ask about the dynamics of your relationship and help you get to your goal. https://www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
WMEA Team
She complained that I was jealous and that I lied about stupid things. She says it’s really hard to trust me
Me and my ex don’t talk but he
mostly text me weekly to go to his house, he won’t stop calling me when he does that. The first time I didn’t budge but this time I did and now I’m trying to see if ignoring him will get him to rethink everything. Do you think this will work ? Or should I keep having sex until he wants something? How would he feel if I slept with him but the next day I started talking yo some other guy? Would he actually try to win me back
Hello Alexandra,
Thank you for your comment. If you and your ex are having sex right now I think its important that you stop and also only let him initiate moving forward and also not being too available for him. This is how we will consider a relationship again so he can be with you. Hope this helps! Best,
WMEA Team
Me and my ex had a choppy 7 1/2 years. Last two was rough. A lot of arguing. I broke her down verbally. Nasty split in September. 3 months of no contact. She tried to move on. I broke her down so bad that she knew the guy was playing her but fell anyways. I feel she has that feeling again and didn’t want to let it go. Well his gf called one day. She had already fallen for him. He comes crawling back a little later and she takes him back. His gf calls again. She thought she was going to spend the rest of her life with him. That he was the one even though she knew he was scum. We started talking again and like a week later her thing went sour and where I was staying went sour. She was staying in my house because of our daughter. I moved back in the beginning of January but we aren’t together. We have been affectionate and intimate a few times. She was starting to fall back into it and then 3 weeks ago just went cold. Not hugging me anymore. Nothing. She did grab me to cuddle the other night. I’m not getting my hopes up because I know what it is. She asked if we could be intimate with no emotions and I was for sure. She said she could but her pulling back so hard makes me believe different because I could see it in her eyes. But she’s so broken that she doesn’t want a relationship and not to fall for me right now. Partly because she made bad decisions with that guy and still doesn’t blame herself. Man what a tough spot to be in. I keep going to her from time to time. Like just tonight I went in around 2:30 and we cuddled and slept for a little and then I made my exit. I do want her back something fierce. I can’t throw away that many years without trying first. We always find each other. Always end up back in each other’s lives. We met out of no where back in 02. Weird how we met but we clicked. 2 month thing and it was over. 8 years later we get back in contact out of the blue. Eventually we start a life and a family. This time around we start talking again and out of no where her thing went south and where I was living did the same and here we are back in each other’s lives and living together. People may call me crazy but that’s fate to me. We always seem to find each other. What can I do? I don’t go to her much anymore. Just a hug here and there and most days she kinda cold, but has been coming to me here and there. I have been keeping my distance the best I can. Giving her space and doing my best to be patient. I know we have a future even if it doesn’t seem that way right now. What strategies will help me to do it right?