Losing the person you love most can feel like getting hit by a freight train of emotions, I know. I’ve been a coach specialized in getting people back together for a long time now and there are various patterns that I’ve been able to observe.
The feelings you experience directly following a breakup can fill you with panic and negativity, but it is crucial to get a handle on them if you want to bounce back, and especially if you want to get back together with this person! So let’s take a look at how to get over rejection from someone you love so that you can make a stronger comeback!
How to get over rejection from someone you love so you can start moving towards your goals
Right now it’s normal that you might find yourself in a negative spiral. You’re panicking about losing the love of your life and it can all feel so overwhelming. If you’re familiar with our philosophy, then you know that we always stress the importance of approaching this type of situation with a positive frame of mind. Being pessimistic or fatalistic in your approach is not going to get you very far.
How to deal with rejection in love: The power of positivity
It’s natural for you to feel like you’re in a negative spiral, and it all comes from being broken up with. It makes it easy for fears and insecurities to take over and for you to focus on the negative. I know you’re probably seeing the glass as half empty right about now.
A lot of my clients express that they experience negative spirals and their heads get cloudy with negative thoughts. They think that their ex is gone forever, that they’ll move on and forget about them, that they’ll find someone else, etc…
This is a situation that I encounter on a regular basis so I know how common it is, but I want to stress the importance of getting rid of this frame of mind. You are not going to get your ex back if you do not overcome your fear of rejection.
Dealing with rejection in love is rough, but it’s crucial that you overcome these insecurities so that you can avoid pushing your ex away.
Why knowing how to get over the fear of rejection is so important
The process of getting back together with an ex consists of inspiring him or her to want to be with you again – so getting over rejection is crucial so that you don’t make it easy for them to focus on any negative attributes.
It’s all about the concept of wellbeing and confidence if you want this person back. If you’re in a constant state of fear, then there is no wellbeing and there is no confidence!
Now is the time to face this fear and understand that it is just your mind playing tricks on you. Just because your ex ended the relationship once, or perhaps even rejected you in the past, it doesn’t mean that the future cannot be different.
In the current state of things, your ex is seeing the glass as half full because they weren’t focused on your negative attributes so much that they chose the pull the plug on the relationship. They have an abstract vision of a new and improved life without you, but it’s still just abstract.
So let’s focus on how to get over the fear of rejection from someone you love!
How to get over being rejected by the person you love by changing your routine
One of the absolute best ways for coping with rejection from someone you love is changing your daily routine and getting out there a bit more. Prioritize meeting new people, talking to those around you, reconnecting with old friends that got put on the back burner and family members that you may have neglected while you were in this relationship.Give love to others – especially those that have given you love.
You can even try to do some community service. One of the best ways to feel good is simply by making people feel good. Not only does it boost your mood, it reminds you of the positive impact you can have on people. When you’re feeling down in the dumps, it’s helpful to spread some love and really make those around you feel special.
Allowing yourself to have a series of little victories will eventually give you a new sense of confidence in yourself, even after rejection.
Love rejection: Becoming the 2.0 version of yourself
When you have to suffer through a breakup AND deal with rejection from your ex, you can lose your sense of motivation. It is up to you however to hold on to it and reinforce it!
Right now, you want to once again become the person that your ex met, not the one they left!
Throughout the course of the relationship, I think it’s safe to say that various things changed. Sometimes we get too comfortable in the relationship and we end up neglecting very important elements of the relationship, seduction, and our personal lives.
At this stage, you’ve got to start prioritizing your own well being again. You need to start seeing the world through the lens of your own passions, your own wants and needs, and your own happiness. Start prioritizing doing the things that define you and speak to you. What got put on the back burner while you were in this relationship? What hobbies and passions were forgotten about that you can bring back to the forefront?
How to get over rejection: Giving yourself goals
Though you’re probably feeling down in the dumps right now, one of the best ways to change your frame of mind is to start setting goals for yourself. As I said, enabling yourself to have a series of little victories will do wonders for your confidence, so put yourself in situations where you know you will excel.
The more inactive you are right now, the more depressed and rejected you will feel. It is only by taking matters into your own life that you will overcome this fear of rejection once and for all!
So I want you to deliberately put yourself in positions in which you can overcome this fear of rejection instead of waiting around for your ex to come back into your life. Think about your talents and your passions, and challenge yourself to seek out situations in which you can showcase your abilities. Make it fun!
For example, if you know you can sing, go to karaoke night with your friends! If you’re a skilled climber or hiker, find new places in nature that you can explore. If you know you’re a great problem solver, explore what you could do in your job to allow you to highlight these skills.
In addition, I encourage you to get out there and try new things that you’ve always wanted to do. For a lot of people the word “challenge” can have a negative connotation, but I want you to look at it as something new and something fresh in your life.
Overcoming the fear of rejection is about being confident in what you bring to the table.
If you would like a helping hand in this challenging period, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us or to leave your question in the comments section below. Together we can come up with a custom action plan to help you with handling rejection and using this situation as fuel for positive change that will enable you to not only get your ex back, but to build a solid relationship that will be better than ever before!
Wishing you all the best in life and love,
Your coach for knowing how to move on from rejection and restoring your relationship,