It’s not always easy to understand your partner because the differences between the sexes aren’t just physical. Expectations, communication, and their point of view vary based on whether you’re a man or a woman. However, understanding the other person is essential, so it’s important to always try to be on the same page. This is paramount because it will serve as a useful tool to overcome arguments and disagreements. On top of differences between the sexes, each person has his or her own personality, and when you’re in a relationship, it’s important to reduce the amount of differences.
So in a breakup, it’s essential to reduce these differences to a bare minimum, so that you can show your ex only your best side, which in turn will help rekindle the flame. Oftentimes you’re looking for solutions, but you have doubts and uncertainties, so you don’t know how to proceed. Even so, you’ve spent months or years with this person, so you should know their expectations. To succeed in this, there are no magic tricks; it all starts with you telling yourself I want to understand my ex!.
I want to understand my ex and why they wanted to breakup in order to meet their expectations
When you’re pursuing someone, you want to make yourself unique in their eyes. You want to impress them, you aim to please, but most importantly, you want them to understand that you can give them what they want. To achieve this, you need to understand and to know the person. Although the techniques don’t change, the goal is now to win the person over once again.
In order to understand your ex’s expectations, you’ll first have to understand why they broke up. Once you know the exact reasons, you will no longer be lost in uncertainty and you’ll be able to pinpoint relevant questions. But it doesn’t stop here… understanding your ex not only helps your move towards your goal of getting back together; it also allows you to learn more about the one you love; to know your ex even better.
Not only that, it’s also a way to know yourself even better. If you understand what your ex expects, and what they felt, you’ll be able to evolve and you’ll know how to make your relationship considerably better. Make sure you don’t skip this important step, because it is how you will be able to think like your ex and come up with tangible solutions when face with road blocks.
Not making the same mistakes is essential
In order to better grasp this step, It’s essential to take a minute to put yourself in your ex’s shoes. Even if you’re the one that got broken up with by the one you love, in their eyes, you’re at fault. Maybe it was because of your attitude, or recurring mistakes, but the point is that your ex was no longer happy. For the person you still have feelings for, breaking up seemed like the only solution because the negative was outweighing the positive. So if you’re able to quickly reverse these tendencies, you’ll be more likely to start anew with your ex.
Knowing that they still have feelings, (it takes time for them to completely go away) don’t waste your time or make the same mistakes. Your ex wants change and that’s exactly what you’ll have to show them. Keep in mind that you don’t want to start up the same exact relationship, because it ended up in a breakup. If you want to give your relationship a second chance, your changes will have to be solid. You have to show to your ex that they can trust the new relationship that is budding between you.
Despite their emotions, affection, and love, your ex is only human; and doesn’t want to go through the same difficult relationship that resulted in a breakup. If you think about it objectively and don’t let your emotions blind you, you’ll realize that this is exactly what your ex is now thinking. In most cases they are open to getting back together; but you’re the one that has to make it happen.
The person that you love wants to see a real change in your attitude; or they want to really see that you take their opinion into consideration. This is another reason why you must truly tell yourself I want to understand my ex. You will no longer make the same mistakes that led to this breakup. Your ex expects a brand new you so that you can start a brand new relationship. The new bond between you two based will be much more solid this time around!
Knowing your partner better is a tool for making your relationship last
I often say that for two people to stay happily together for a long time, each person has to communicate effectively. Communication is the basis of a healthy relationship and I’ve noticed that most problems arising in love root from miscommunication or lack of communication. But it’s not only about changing your words. Your actions will need to change as well if you want radical improvement in your relationship.
When you fully give yourself to your partner, you teach them a lot about yourself. You might not even be aware of it, but it’s a huge advancement. Even a simple discussion could be a goldmine of information for your partner. This isn’t one-sided; you both have to know each other like the back of your hand. When you’re in a couple, you both have to make efforts to communicate, listen, learn, and understand one another.
The coach that can help you better understand your ex