Following a breakup, a number of scenarios are likely to happen between you and your ex. It’s possible that the two of you will maintain good relations and continue to talk. You may even continue to see each other. On the contrary there may be tense feelings or it may even be full-blown war. In this article we will look into different scenario where things have gotten out of control and your ex refuses to see you all together!
We will focus on trying to explain why your ex has no intention of seeing or spending time with you altogether. We seek to provide you with concrete answers on why they feel the need to totally cut off contact, and why they feel that they have nothing more to say to you.
“Why does my ex not want to see me?” I get asked this question almost on a daily basis during my coaching sessions by phone or via email. As I often say, each story is unique and has its own specificities, just like every person is unique and has their own story. It’s always a challenge to give you tailored responses without knowing the heart of your specific sets of problems. It truly takes a thorough analysis. However based on my experience it’s possible to showcase three main reasons that can explain such a behavior.
By the time you are done with this article you will have more insight on what’s stopping your ex from seeing you. In turn this should enable you to start to reflect on how you can change their mind and being the process of getting back together.
My ex does not want to see me: 3 reasons why!
The three explanations find below can seem too simple to readers who don’t see themselves getting back with their ex; but you must realize however that when someone is in the process of looking to get back with their ex, it’s hard to garner the necessary perspective on one’s own. This is one of the main reason why we recommend coaching sessions, in order to get the proper support and advice to meet your objectives.
1. Your ex may have moved on to a new relationship
One of the main reasons that can explain why your ex may not want to see you is that they have found love elsewhere. In fact, when your ex has a new person in their life, it’s understandable that they wouldn’t want to see you. You may have been engaged in an intense or serious relationship, so seeing you could undermine their new interest or create tension. Their feelings could be growing, and consequently, your ex had cut ties with you in order to commit to their new boyfriend or girlfriend and to not be tempted of wanting to be with you again!
It’s common for a lot of men and women to try to get over an ex by finding someone else as quickly as possible. In reality that is not be the healthiest option of finding love; but people often times seek this new relationship not to dwell on or think too much about the breakup; By thinking about someone else, you aren’t thinking about your ex.
Another explanation for this same scenario could be that someone is telling him or her not to talk to you. We all know that it can be very common; Jealousy may very well be a factor if you were in a long-term relationship or if you and your ex had a strong connection. His or her new partner wants to protect their new relationship. You know your ex better than they do and, most likely, you were well past the seduction phase that they are currently in. Therefore, you represent competition to them!
2. Your ex has not forgiven you
Do you know the reason why they broke up with you? What exactly was said?
These are essential questions to ask yourself before thinking about how to win them back. It didn’t happen by chance – after months or even years of being together, this probably wasn’t an impulse or a spur-of-the-moment decision.
There must be valid reasons behind a decision of this magnitude. You may not be responsible for the breakup, but if you are, and your ex isn’t speaking a word to you, it’s probably because they have yet to forgive you. We often ask ourselves why our ex doesn’t want to see us or speak with us. Betrayal, lies and infidelity can leave enormous psychological scars. In fact, some of the hardest relationships to get over are the ones in which infidelity played a part. Breaking up doesn’t make it any easier for them. Most often, it makes it even harder to recover from the past transgression.
Staying upset at the one who hurt you is totally understandable after being forced to go through something that traumatic. This is surely what your ex feels if you’ve done such an egregious action. He or she will associate you with that pain which can explain their need for space.
3. Your ex does not want to see you because they aren’t ready
Following a break up, there’s a common element which must be respected by both sides: distance. Your ex obviously needs it. They took a strong decision by leaving you and ceasing communications. Attempting to restore the relationship several days later isn’t a good idea and won’t help your chances of getting back with your ex. Worst of all, this can turn what would have been a short respite into a long-term deal breaker – particularly for new couples.
Your ex-girlfriend or boyfriend won’t be the only one who needs space. You can use it to your benefit as well, despite what you may think. In your head, you will go to any length to reconcile with your ex and to ensure that they don’t lose their feelings for you. But you are wrong to think that way. You must act differently not to make any mistakes and take your time in order to put the best plan into place and to execute it at the right time.
You just experienced shock, and consequently, you need to build yourself back up and win back your morale before trying to win your ex back. It’s even harder to completely turn over a new leaf in the relationship. Before getting back in touch, your ex needs to feel ready, and it’s for that reason that you shouldn’t try to rush things.
Your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend may not be ready to give you a second chance just yet or even agree to meet up with you. Just realize that it could be a blessing in disguise; in order to succeed in your goal of getting back together you must be in the right frame of mind. A bit of distance can help you regain the strength and momentum you need to start a new and improved relationship with the one you love!
Your coach to help you figure out why your ex does not want to see you,