Your ex is starting to be nice to you again and you want to take advantage of the situation to get them back for good? How can you avoid wasting this chance to get back together when your ex has other prospects. What are the right things to do and what are the wrong things to do?
Succeeding in getting back together requires that you avoid making mistakes and that you learn how react accordingly when your ex is showing you signs of encouragement and a change in their attitude.
When you realize my ex keeps coming back you have to make the right decisions to ensure that you won’t scare them off. You also should be careful to not misinterpret the situation (don’t count your chickens before they hatch.)
In this article I will show you how to put things into perspective regarding your breakup when your ex is making a comeback so that you can avoid making the main errors that people have the tendency to make.
I’ll also share three common situations that you might be faced with that could easy throw you off. The situation is unusual when your ex is coming back around because they’ve understood how important you are in their life.
Don’t hesitate to leave a comment on this article about your personal situation because each story is unique and you have to factor in even the smallest details. Enjoy!
Never think “ My ex keeps coming back around but doesn’t stay so maybe something is wrong with me ”
Most people that contact me in order to talk about their ex’s behavior always ask me, “Why is my ex doing this?” I always reply that it’s very important to not focus on the “why,” but rather on the idea of “How can I continue to make things change for the better?”
When you’re trying to get back together with your ex, you’re “not allowed” to come up with interpretations because they’re often false and will lead to the wrong moves.
There are often dozens of possible explanations that can put things into perspective regarding the situation and your ex’s new attitude, and if you misinterpret you could face a serious setback.
On the other hand, if you focus on what you need to continue doing in order to coax your ex back into your life, you’ll adopt the right attitude.
For example, if you’re saying, “My ex is jealous so they definitely still have feelings for me,” maybe you’re right… but you could also be very wrong! Sometimes a person acts like this simply because of their pride and not because they regret breaking up.
My ex is contacting me again: How should I react?
This is good news if you’re starting to communicate again because this will create something that I call “openings.” You’ll have moments to show your ex your improvements and you’ll also have the chance to show them that they made a mistake in leaving you.
When your ex makes the decision to get back in touch with you, you can consider this as something very positive. That said; don’t get carried away.
Continue focusing on your efforts to encourage your ex to want to talk to you, to discover your changes, and maybe even to start wondering if they should propose getting back together.
It’s important to learn how to properly handle contact and daily communication and I have another useful tip to share with you. What do you think the main mistake 9 out of 10 people make right before they contact me for a private coaching session?
It’s when they rush things and hurry their ex partner. If you claim victory too early or if you simply can’t comply to your ex’s needs, a definitely breakup is never far.
However, when your ex is the one making the first step and is showing their desire to talk, you have to take advantage of being on the same page (emotionally speaking) as them.
Your ex is expecting you to be compliant and that you’ve been waiting for this opportunity to tell them how amazing you think they are. So, don’t! You’re going to put an end to this type of behavior so that you can get on the same level and make a little bit of distance between you.
You’ll show them that you’re open to conversation, new affinity between you, but you’re not expecting to get back together right away. When you’re thinking, “my ex is coming back” you should avoid showing them your gut reaction.
Don’t forget that you need to surprise your ex if you want to get them back, and you have to focus on re-seducing them.
My ex wants to see me again: Do I have to accept?
It’s a whole different ball game when your ex suggests meeting up. This is the perfect opportunity to make a good impression and to once again seduce your ex-partner.
Under these circumstances I suggest that you accept your ex’s suggestion without expecting anything in return. Of course this isn’t the easiest task because you’re dying to tell them everything that you’re feeling but this would end up being a big mistake…
Why?
I explain it in detail in my book, “70 Pro Tips To Get Back With Your Ex” but to sum it up if your ex is proposing meeting up, it means that they’re showing you interest.
If you want to make them even more interested, you have to avoid looking like they’ve got you under their thumb. Distance is your ally in this situation – and it is especially efficient in hiding the fact that your ex could come back whenever.
This is one of the main elements of seduction so of course it’s the same when you’re in the re-seduction phase!
You also have to remember that your ex will return to you when they begin to fear losing you, even if they’re the one that decided to leave.
My ex is jealous, is this a good sign?
Your ex is acting “weird” and is double-dealing. First of all they’re jealous when they see that you’ve been able to rebuild yourself, that you’re having fun with your friends and that you have no trouble talking about the breakup without having any negative feelings.
But on the other hand when you try to get a little closer, your ex immediately takes a step back and this tug of war situation is starting to get on your nerves. I understand…
So how can you explain their behavior? And what on earth can you do about it?
Your ex will return to you when they fear losing you so most of the time when you make some distance between you, you can spark their desire to be close to you again.
You think that the jealousy that your ex is showing you is enough in the moment but in reality you’re going to have to go a lot further if you want to get back together for good. In truth, if you react too quickly to their fit of jealousy you’re going to reassure them that you want to get back together.
So many people that I coach ask me, “What should I do if my ex thinks that I don’t need them anymore to be happy?”
You should know that this is pretty much the best thing that could happen to you and this is how they will feel a real need to be together with you again (even if your ex is claiming that they don’t feel anything for you.) You shouldn’t change your entire behavior after just one fit of jealousy.
Just because they want to see you doesn’t automatically mean that they want to get back together. If your ex is thinking about being friends you’re going to have to use even more subtle things in order to bring seduction back into your exchanges.
You now know the best attitude to have when your ex is coming back around. Now is the time to act while keeping in mind how important it is that you rebuild yourself!
I wish you all the best!
Kind regards,
Adrian,
Relationship expert specialized in helping people to get back with their ex
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