Relationships can sometime be tough to nurture. On the one hand it may seem as if you cannot live with him or her but on the other hand you know that you have had wonderful moments, and you still love the person that you are with. It’s just that after a while the little things can annoy you more than before or issues can snowball and turn into big arguments or even verbal sparring.
If you are going through a relationship crisis but are committed to try to salvage your relationship and make things work than we are here to help. In doing what we love, we find pride and joy in helping individuals just like you to reach their objectives and find the right balance in their love lives.
Sometimes people reach out to us too late, after they have made many mistakes. Fortunately for you, even if your relationship may be on the ropes you may still be together; so you can prove to the one you love that you make them happy before having to separate. In this article we will tell you how to identify your negative behaviors and create a new and improved dynamic in your relationship.
Change your mindset and pick your battles with your significant other
Immediately I will ask you to stop banging your head against the wall and take a step back. Recognize first and foremost that in most relationship conflicts both people are very frustrated; you are not the only suffering from the present situation! If you are reading this article it means that you are taking the right steps to turn your relationship around to find good solutions to the issues that you are facing as a couple. That’s great but I will need you to go even further! I will need you to completely change your mindset and to be in a spirit of compromise and compassion with the one you love moving forward.
You often hear the term pick your battles, and that’s exactly what you will need to start doing right away and moving forward. Instead of trying to prove a point or show him or her that you are right and that they are wrong, realize that those types of conflictual situations will not help you stay together; no matter who wins the argument, if it’s a confrontation you will only keep driving each other away! Instead try to take a different approach; look below the surface to try to understand the root causes of the issues that you are facing as a couple.
I often tell people that I coach over the phone or in person that arguments are only the tip of the iceberg. A lot is happening below the surface; if you turn your attention to what is unseen perhaps you will be in a better position to find a compromise or at the very least to be compassionate in regards to the opinion and point of view of the person that you are with! The best way to start this process and to be accountable to your self is to start writing your thoughts on paper. Start by listing all of the issues that you are facing today as a couple; all of them, leave no stone unturned because what may seem like a trivial problem to you may be the most important one for your significant other.
Once you have completed this first step, I want you to take a 360 degree approach to identifying the different forces that are creating this conflict from both your point of view as well as his or hers’. Look back on your significant other’s values and principles, but also on the way they were raised, their aspirations, fears and insecurities and do the same from your point of view as well as it relates to the different issues. You will quickly realize that a few common themes will start to take shape and you will instantly start to understand the person that you are with on a deeper level. Compromise and compassion is the quickest path to stabilizing your relationship!
A relationship crisis is a chance to renew your love for each other
Do not be fearful in regards to your current situation and what you are going through. I say this because very often people are insecure and fear being dumped; the fear of rejection or of being alone can paralyze you and prevent you from doing the right actions. A relationship crisis simply means that your couple has been experiencing serious issues for some time. You and your partner have fallen out of touch and this is your chance to right the ship or turn it all around! Remember that human beings almost always grow trough pain and tribulations; we learn through our mistakes and in times of crisis and we push ourselves to get better and to find the right solutions. You can do the same by embracing the challenge of saving your relationship.
If you follow my advice you should already have a comprehensive list of all the issues that your couple is facing today. You will also have perspective on these same issues as you now understand some of the forces that are at play below the surface that are driving you both apart. To continue our approach in a spirit of compromise and compassion, I will now ask you to come up with 2 or 3 concrete solutions that you can implement in order to prevent conflict related to each issue identified. When providing these solutions you will need to write down tangible actions that are measurable. For example stray away from general comments such as “I need to be more caring” or “I need to be less jealous”; you need to include a when and how element to each of the actions that you intend to carry out to fix your relationship for good!
Act now and save your couple before it’s too late!
The most dangerous thing that you can do at this point it to procrastinate and do nothing. If you continue down the same road without changing your relationship won’t make it. It’s simply not realistic to think that things will sort themselves out over time without putting emphasis on solving the deep rooted issues that you are faced with today in your love life. Relationships take work and a constant investment of time and emotion. I urge you to act now before it’s too late!
We have provided you with a starting point in regards to what to do and how to go about changing the current dynamic. But you will have to really carry out all of the solutions that you will identified over the long haul in order to prove to the one you love that you can be happy together. It will take time, effort and dedication but in the end if you stay focused you will come out of this relationship crisis smiling and stronger. You and your partner will have a renewed sense of commitment to one another as you will have been able to overcome the challenges faced together. There is no greater feeling when you love the person that you are with; to know that you didn’t simply give up and that you truly did all that you could to make things work!
If you are currently facing some serious issues in your relationship and feel that you need more help or support, I urge you to reach out to our experts to schedule a session. We will put all of our expertise to use and provide you with a game plan, give you concrete actions to undertake to solve your day to day problems and tools to ensure that you meet your objectives.
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Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love... for good!