Breaking up is difficult. It’s painful, scary, and can leave your heart shattered in a million pieces. There is one thing that could make all of this even scarier… and that is when doubts start to creep in. Was breaking up a mistake? Did you leave the love of your life? Is everything ruined?!
The pain that follows a breakup can sometimes make it very hard to see clearly. Your head is full of doubts and uncertainties, so I have written this article to help you figure out whether or not breaking up with this person was the right thing to do!
If by the end of this article you feel like you’ve made a mistake in letting this person go, don’t worry. As a coach specialized in getting ex partners back, believe me when I say that hope is not lost!
When you regret breaking up there is a very important question to ask yourself…
Before we go any further, I want to take a look at why many people ask themselves if breaking up was a mistake.
When you end a relationship, it feels like your life is turned upside down. You had developed a routine, and you were used to having this person by your side. You could turn to them for anything, and you knew you would get to go to sleep in their arms. Now they’re gone and you’re left with a void.
This void is perfectly natural. Any person is going to feel it if their situation dramatically changes – just like yours just did. It can be extremely uncomfortable and very scary, and you’re going to want to get out of it as soon as possible.
What would be the quickest way to get out of this uncomfortable situation? Well, to get back together with your ex and restore the little routine you had going on.
What I really want you to ask yourself is this: Are you thinking, “I regret breaking up with him/her” because you don’t like the pain and discomfort of a breakup, or because you have come to realize that this person is actually the love of your life?
Similarly, there is another phenomenon that I often come across in my coaching sessions with people who regret breaking up. Unfortunately it is very common, and if you’re wondering if you made a mistake in letting this person go, I want you to pay close attention to this next part.
Many people struggle with emotional dependency on their ex partner. They lose themselves in the relationship and end up feeling like they can’t be happy without this person. They start to feel like they need their ex – even if the relationship wasn’t making them that happy. If you feel like this might be the case for you, I encourage you to click the link so that you can find out more on how to combat this situation and allow yourself to have the most fulfilling relationship possible.
I want you to reflect on this before you think about anything else, because wanting an ex back because you feel like your happiness depends on them could cause problems. A happy, long lasting relationship will be one in which there is balance, and if you could use a helping hand with this, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me directly here!
Now, I know you are thinking “I think I regret breaking up with her or him and I want to figure out how to be sure,” so let’s dive right in!
Did I make a mistake breaking up with him/her? Look for these 10 signs!
I know that things might be feeling rough right now but rest assured, there are signs that your breakup was a mistake. If you recognize many of these, it might be time to start working on getting your ex back!
Like I said, it’s not impossible. In fact, when it comes to love nothing is impossible as long as you’re willing to put forth the required effort! I can tell you right now that it’s not a piece of cake, but your hard work can pay off.
So, what are the signs the breakup was a mistake?!
Here they are in no particular order:
• You can’t stop thinking about him or her.
Some time has passed since the breakup and you’re realizing that this person is still on your mind all the time. There is so much you wish you could be sharing with them these days. You wonder what they’re up to, if they’re happy, and you realize that they’re the last thing you think about before you fall asleep and the first thing you think about in the morning.
• You haven’t met anyone else that you connect with as much as you did with your ex
You’ve been meeting people but no one has the same effect on you. No one sparks your attention quite like your ex did, and no one inspires you as much as they did. You aren’t as excited about anyone else, and quite frankly, you can’t imagine feeling anything so strong for anyone else.
• You still sincerely feel that your future together would be wonderful
You’ve analyzed the breakup and you know what solutions to offer, and deep down you truly feel that it would be worth it to work through the challenges you were having. You know that you could become stronger than ever and you’re willing to put forth the effort. Your gut tells you that you can move past this breakup and restore the bond between you.
• You felt like he or she made you a better person
Your ex helped you to be the best version of yourself and you know that they brought out the best in you. Sometimes people bring out the worst in us, but when they bring out the best in us, it means that they’re something special. You know that your life was the best it’s ever been when this person was by your side, and they inspired you to grow and reach your goals.
• It was an impulsive break up
You broke up with your ex in the heat of the moment. Tempers were flaring and you couldn’t get a handle on your emotions. Without thinking, you pulled the plug on the relationship and you’re now realizing that it maybe wasn’t such a good idea. This happens often, but it’s very important to develop communication and anger management skills so that this doesn’t become a recurring thing.
• Your gut tells you that it was a mistake to break up
We are intuitive beings, and your gut usually knows what’s up. If you are feeling that it was wrong to break up and you can’t shake the feeling, it might be the case. It’s normal to sometimes experience doubts following a breakup, but if you are feeling like this on a regular basis it could mean that it’s time to start righting wrongs!
Yep, I’ve got dumper’s regret. Is it too late?
It most certainly is not too late. If you want your ex back, you’ve got to take the time to analyze what went wrong and what kind of long term solutions you can provide them in the future.
You and your ex broke up for a reason, and it’s important to remember that your ex is not going to want to step back into an identical relationship because you both know how that ended.
There are various tools available to you right now, like the handwritten letter for example. If you’re the one that broke up with your ex, the no contact rule is not recommended except in very specific situations. If you’d like one on one guidance, again, we are always here to help and you can get in touch with us right here.
Wishing you all the best,
Your coach when you’re wondering if breaking was a mistake