You and your ex broke up but you’re still living together? You hate having to see each other every day as friends instead of lovers? Are you still in love with your ex and wish that you knew what to do to get them back? These are all questions that Lucas could relate too as we were getting ready to get started on our consultation. As a relationship expert tons and tons of people have reached out to me not knowing how to act or what they should do after having broken up with their ex but still living with them.
Like I told Lucas today over the phone, I understand that it’s a weird position to be in; having broken up but still living together means tons of awkward situations that aren’t always easy to deal with on your own!
Do you ignore each other? How can you make your ex be in demand or miss you? How can you prove that you are evolving if you see each other every day? Or worse, how do you react if your ex starts dating someone else and doesn’t hide it from you?
If you find yourself in the awkward position of still living with your ex, this article is for you; I hope that my advice will help you regain a sense of control and empower you to realize that it’s still possible for you to get back with the one you love if you implement the right actions!
Broken up but still living together? This is what you should do!
You and your ex could be forced to live under the same roof after a breakup for a myriad of reasons; you may have signed a lease that you can’t get out of, you may have kids together and don’t want to just leave from one day to the next, you may be financially tied and have no other choice; or you may just be in a state of limbo and unsure of what to do next.
No matter what the reason may be if you are still hoping to get back together you need to make the most of this situation in order to surprise your ex and prove that you can make them happy.
For all of the negatives that could be found about still living with an ex after a breakup, the reality is that you have a unique opportunity to see them almost on a daily basis.
I coach tons of people who haven’t spoken to their ex in months; having that communication platform is a huge advantage and you can make the most of it by proving to your ex that you are beginning to change and that the breakup is a huge mistake!
If your ex decided to breakup, I would like you to try to surprise them through your actions and not through your words. Your ex thinks that they know you and that you are incapable of making them happy in the long run; that’s why they broke up with you. I want you to reflect on your ex’s expectations and figure out where you came short.
Once you have a good grasp of where things went wrong and what you could have done better, I want you to act against nature or what you would normally do while also start to implement little actions to change certain negative behaviors that you displayed during your relationship.
Don’t do things for your ex however; do them for you!
That’s the only way you will be credible and your ex will be able to tell the difference!
How to do a radio silence when you are still living together
A radio silence is a strict no contact period following a breakup. It is an amazing tool that can empower you and allow you to regain a sense of control if you’ve made mistakes, if you were too needy or if you were in a long term relationship.
If you have kids or still live with your ex, implementing a no contact period can be quite tricky or awkward because you are probably forced to see each other almost every day!
But we have adapted this unique tool to you! You can interact with your ex but only if they come reaching out to you! You still need to take a bit of distance, change your communication platforms and not give them any special kind of attention; however, you shouldn’t be negative or too cold either.
The trick is to smile, to be in a good mood, to be pleasant especially when you are interacting with other people around your ex but without making your ex feel special in anyway.
That way you will prove to them that you are no longer emotionally dependent and that you are in the process of moving on! Your ex will slowly start to see you slipping away and it will be their natural human instinct or reaction to try to re-seduce you some way or at the very least to start to have doubts or regrets.
A chance to prove your change and that you can make your ex happy
Being broken up but still living together is a chance to prove to your ex that you are evolving in a positive way on a daily basis. You really shouldn’t see it as something negative but rather as a unique opportunity to show to your ex that you can make them happy!
Even in the worse possible circumstances, if your ex starts to date other people or bring potential new partners into your place, you can still act positively. The trick is not to be in a reactionary state of mind but rather to take the lead in doing certain things that can enable you to regain control and to surprise your ex!
If you were too needy and your ex took you for granted such a situation can be used to showcase the fact that you have evolved and that you are capable of not being jealous, not throwing a fit or falling for their provocation.
On the contrary, if you were too distant or removed or failed to show to your ex that you cared enough, this would be a perfect situation to step in and prove them otherwise!
Show that you can’t tolerate seeing them with someone else in a home where you shared so many memories and moments; Say that it’s necessary for you both to respect each other even if you are no longer together.
Your ex is probably looking to get a reaction out of you one way or the other, especially if you have implemented a radio silence. If things had gotten really bad and they really couldn’t stand you at all, your ex would have moved out or requested you to do the same.
In other words, the fact that you are still in this state of limbo where you are not officially together but still living under the same roof proves to me that there is still a chance to salvage your relationship.
If you find yourself in this situation and need guidance or support to maximize your chances of getting back with your ex than reach out to me! It would be my pleasure to put my experience and expertise to work for you; and to guide you step by step towards meeting your goals.
The coach to call if you are broken up but still living together,
Life Coach, Motivational Speaker & Relationship Expert
I Know We Are Meant To Be!
Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love... for good!