Getting broken up with is never easy and it often comes as a shock! You don’t see it coming because you have gotten comfortable; you’ve settled and some way or another stopped inspiring her like you used too. Your girlfriend or wife left you simply because she was no longer happy; perhaps you didn’t take her seriously enough when she tried to voice her complaints!
But don’t panic! No matter why she left you it is still possible to get back with your ex girlfriend, fiancé or wife if you put the right actions in place. If you are still asking yourself why did she dump me the first thing you may want to do is to take a step back and reflect on your relationship and where things went wrong. An introspection or the ability to understand one’s mistakes is where any attempt to get back with an ex should start.
Through this article I will provide you with tips to answer the question of why she decided to leave you. You will be able to better understand your relationship, where things went wrong and to know exactly what you need to do if you are still hoping to get back together!
Take the time to understand your mistakes
It isn’t easy to acknowledge that you’ve made mistakes or that you didn’t give it your all. Pride and ego get in the way and it’s far simpler to blame others for our shortcomings. But the truth is that if you were broken up with you must have had your part of responsibility; at some point your actions must have made your ex reconsider her desire to be with you. Furthermore her doubts must have turned into a strong belief that she could no longer be happy with you! On the surface the separation can be explained quite simply actually: your girlfriend or wife broke up with you because she no longer had faith that you could make her happy in the future. The beautiful thing is that if you are able to identify why she felt this way and change this belief, you will actually be able to get back with the one you love, no matter how things ended!
So let’s dive a bit deeper and try to understand what may have led her to change the way she felt about you and your relationship. I say change because it is my belief and assumption that you were once happy together. You must have made her feel that you could both be fulfilled with one another, especially in the early parts of your relationship; otherwise you wouldn’t have started dating in the first place!
So somewhere things changed and it must have been for one of two reasons; the first possibility is that you became too needy, too in demand of her time and attention and stopped being a challenge for her; In other words the love and attention that you were providing to her became overbearing and you became too clingy. Did you always suggest doing things together? Did you prevent her from engaging in one of her hobbies? Did you give her a hard time when she hung out with her friends or relatives? If you answered yes to any of those questions than you will know that this behavior is what caused your relationship to unravel.
If that wasn’t the case than you probably acted in another extreme way by being too removed or simply not invested enough in your relationship. Your girlfriend needed more of your attention and love; she felt undervalued or that she wasn’t treated as she should have been. Did you stop putting in as much efforts as you once did? Did you get too comfortable and stopped doing little things to show her how much you care and appreciate her? Did you spend countless hours at work neglecting your relationship in the process? If you said yes to any of these questions, than you will know that this is the reason why she broke up with you!
Why did she dump me if we were happy?
Now you are in a position to understand the fundamental reasons why she broke up with you. I often hear people tell me; but Adrian why did she dump me if we were happy? Clearly the people who ask me this question have not done enough soul searching. You may think that you were both happy but that surely wasn’t the case; she may have pretended that things were going well for some time but deep down inside at least one of you if not both were very unhappy!
Of course you may also have shared some good times and everything wasn’t always gloomy in your relationship. But that wasn’t enough. You need to take more time to understand how you can make her consistently happy over a longer period of time. In order to do this you will need to evolve; you will need to change your behavior and show her over time that you can be the man of her dreams.
Are you prepared to do what it takes to win her back?
No matter what caused the separation it is most likely still possible for you to get back with the one you love. You will need to be patient and persistent in order to prove to her that you are a new man through concrete actions in your day to day life. If you were too clingy, you will need to give her some space and focus on your personal development and your own endeavors. Go back to doing what makes you happy, follow your passions and your dreams and let go in order to once again be appealing in her eyes. If you are able to take on this challenge, you will most likely be able to inspire your ex and she will see you as someone with whom she can have a bright future with.
On the other hand if you now recognize that you didn’t do enough, I highly suggest that you wait a few weeks for the dust to settle after the breakup; once you have really understood the real reasons behind the separation and you have done some self-reflection, perhaps you should write a hand written letter to her to explain your mistakes and your deep desire to change and to make her happy. Than through your actions you will be able to also prove to her in time, that you can be the man of her dreams; the one that encourages her to pursue her passions and endeavors.
If you would like to know even more, or still have questions in regards to why she left you don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts or questions in the comments section below. I will be sure to answers each and every comment received!
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