Getting broken up with without an explanation is extremely painful, but it also makes it much harder to heal from the breakup. That is why I’ve written this article today. I’m going to explain the most common reason guys breakup with girls out of the blue. Understanding what went on in his mind can help you to plan your next move, whether you want him back or not!
As an expert in love and relationships, I’ve encountered this situation more times that I can count. You feel hurt, abandoned, confused, frustrated and deeply unhappy. You’re probably wondering about what you may have done wrong, and what you could have done differently. You’re in luck because you’ve found an article that is going to answer all these questions!
Are sudden breakups common?
As I said, this is a situation I come across fairly often. One of my clients came to me recently saying, “My boyfriend just broke up with me out of nowhere.” In fact, he was her fiancé… One day he was talking about the wedding and how it’s going to be to see her walking down the aisle, and the next day he said that he “can’t do this” and ended the relationship. My client, Katie, was left dumfounded. How do you go from wanting to get married to deciding that the relationship should be over just like that?
Similarly, last week I got an email from Francesca who told me that her husband of five years came home one day and told her that he was leaving. They had created a life together, they were working on their house, they were thinking of having a baby, and she truly thought that they were happy. When he ended it suddenly she felt like the rug had been ripped out from underneath her. Now what? Where was he going? … And why?
It hurts. It really, really hurts, and it feels so unfair. If you had some fair warning maybe you could have done something differently to make him want to stay. I bet your head is swimming with questions and negative thoughts right now, but let me tell you something.
Sometimes a sudden break up without warning could not have been avoided. Now before you panic, this doesn’t mean that it isn’t reversible.
Men often bottle their emotions up and don’t let anyone see them. They don’t like being vulnerable and sometimes they just don’t know how to handle them. So how could you fix the problem if he didn’t tell you that there was one? I know that this makes everything that much more frustrating, but I will give you some things to think about that will help you to analyze the situation and pinpoint what exactly happened.
Understanding what happened is they key to moving forward, regardless of whether you want your ex back or not. If you do choose to begin working on getting back together with your ex, I encourage you to click this link.
Why guys break up suddenly and disappear…
When a relationship ends like this, it’s very hard to find closure and people sometimes even end up blaming themselves. It’s kind of similar to thinking you’re doing a great job at work, only to be abruptly fired.
I know that you’re wondering why this happened? How could your boyfriend pull the plug out of the blue line this? Well, no one ever breaks up with someone for no reason, even if it might feel like that’s what he just did. Oftentimes, when a guy dumps you unexpectedly, it’s because something has been on his mind for a while and he didn’t have the courage (or didn’t know how) to bring it up.
So even if he ended it suddenly, it doesn’t mean there wasn’t something specifically bothering him about the relationship. With these kinds of breakups, there is a common theme that I have noticed over the years: Fear.
• Fear of commitment
• Fear of the responsibility that comes with a serious relationship
• Fear of not being good enough
• Fear of being vulnerable
The list can go on and on, and fear can take many different forms. One of the most common reasons men break up with women very abruptly is that they’re afraid of something. For example, a man might pull away and want to get out of the relationship when he feels like things are moving too fast. He might also bail if he feels like he’s not going to be able to step up to the plate and be the man you want him to be. It’s often rooted in issues with self confidence.Now that’s one thing, but what about the answer to “Why he broke up with me so suddenly and disappeared?”
When someone breaks up with you out of the blue and then disappears into thin air, it means that they want to avoid taking responsibility for their actions. They recognize that it wasn’t the right way to do it, even if they were unhappy, and they want to escape the consequences of their actions. On some level, they feel like this is how they get to press the “reset button.”
Sometimes they act like this because they really want to end the relationship and make it so that it’s very hard for you to speak to them and try to change their mind. This is especially true when they don’t feel like there’s enough they can blame you for…
Another reason is that he met someone else and didn’t know how to make the transition gracefully. If this is what happened to you and you want to know how to get him back from your replacement, read this!
My boyfriend broke up with me suddenly but I want him back
I know that many of you reading this article are interesting in knowing how to win him back, so I wanted to include this section as this article comes to a close.
When he breaks up with you out of the blue, the first thing you’re going to need to do is reflect on whether or not you really want to pursue getting back together. Make sure that you aren’t doing so because of emotional dependency or fear of being alone.
If you truly feel that this man is your soulmate, the next step is going to be taking care of yourself. Now is the time put yourself first and become the best version of yourself.
There are tools available to you during this period, like the no contact technique, and while you’re using these tools and healing, you’ll need to analyze the breakup.
If you really want him back, I encourage you to reach out to us directly so that we can design a custom action plan that will be perfectly suited to your specific situation.
As always, we are always here to help so don’t hesitate to leave your question in the comments section below.
All my best,
Your coach when a guy breaks up with you
Adrian
I Know We Are Meant To Be!
Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love... for good!