It’s frustrating, it’s maddening, and it’s scary. Your ex is not talking to you. They’re ignoring you, and they’re not replying to your messages, and you don’t know what to do. It feels like you’ve tried everything, so how are you supposed to turn things around? If you’re on this site, you’re probably hoping to get back together with this person and their behavior is starting to drive you nuts. It feels like it’s impossible to get anywhere because you can’t even have a conversation with this person. More often than not, this feeling can lead to panic, which of course leads to mistakes.
In today’s article, I’m going to go over what your ex is feeling right now and what you can do about it. I’ll list the reasons your ex won’t talk to you right now and help you define a proper game plan to turn things around! It’s scary when you don’t know what’s going on, but I want you to know that you’re in more control of the situation than you may realize!
You are currently experiencing one of the hardest parts of a breakup. Realizing that you no longer have an impact on your ex can feel like a knife straight to the heart. It feels like you’ve just disappeared from the life of the person you love most, and it fills you with a sense of dread. It’s normal that this feeling would drive you crazy, but it is my goal to provide you with some guidance so that you can change the situation for the better. So let’s dive right in!
What are the main reasons your ex won’t talk to you right now?
As painful as it might be, there is always a reason behind why an ex would be avoiding you. In some situations it’s more clear than in others, but it is always painful for the person on the receiving end.
When you’re in a situation that has got you thinking, “My ex refuses to talk to me,” it’s usually because your ex is trying to reaffirm their choice to end their relationship with you. They are trying to make a point, and they want to show you that they aren’t going to budge. They want to show that they will not change their mind, and they want you to stop trying to make them change their mind.
This is how they’re trying to seize control of the situation. More often than not, the person in your position ends up being too clingy and needy, and this pushes the ex in question away. The more attention you seek from a person who does not want to give it, the more inclined they will feel to pull away and put up walls between you.
It can quickly become a downward spiral if you don’t get in control of the situation. The needier you become, the more your ex pulls away, and the more they pull away, the needier you become! To put it frankly, it becomes a recipe for disaster. At this stage, the more you chase, the deeper you’re going to dig yourself into a hole.
When he ignores you after a breakup or when she refuses to talk to you after a breakup, it’s because they’re trying to make a point. They want it to be clear that you aren’t getting back together. They are creating a wall to keep you out, and yes, it hurts.
What I want you to understand right off the bat is that if you are insisting on keeping the relationship that ended alive, you’re going to be sorely disappointed. Your ex pulled the plug on that relationship for a reason… but that doesn’t mean that all hope is lost.
Before I go into how to get on the path towards success, I want to go over a few more reasons your ex won’t talk to you right now.
Another common reason is that it’s their way of dealing with the pain of the breakup. Being in touch with you and seeing you hurts! It can feel like twisting the knife in the wound of someone who just went through a breakup. They might feel that they need to move on, and being in touch with you would hold them back.
It could also be because they’re seeing someone new. I know you don’t want to hear that, but I want you to be aware of all the possibilities so that you can be fully equipped to deal with them. If you suspect that your ex might be in a rebound relationship and aren’t sure what to do about it, click here!
I’ve also seen cases in which an ex puts up walls because they’re actually ashamed of their behavior and/or their role in the breakup. People often have a lot of trouble accepting their actions, and if your ex did something that directly lead to the breakup, they could be isolating themselves out of shame.
So, I know that you hate this situation of not talking to your ex, so what can we do about it?
My ex is ignoring me: Here’s what to do!
I know that you’re dying to know how to get your ex to talk to you. Is there anything you can say to get their attention?
Well, first and foremost, now is the time to take a step back. I know you don’t want to because you’re afraid of losing this person, but sometimes you have to take a step back so that you can make a stronger comeback!
Right now, you’ve got to analyze the details of your current situation. Your ex’s attitude and the way they see you are going to have to change. At this specific moment, your ex does not have faith in your ability to make them happy, they can’t envision a future with you, and right now they’re focusing on making themselves happy. This is why they are no longer affected by your needs and how you’re feeling right now.
So the first thing to do is stop! Stop reaching out. No more texts, no more calls, no more liking their photos on Facebook and Instagram, no more emails… nada!
Even if you work together, take a step back and focus solely on yourself. Take them off of the pedestal that you’ve placed them on. Your energy needs to be focused on productive things that will help you find a sense of inner peace and personal well being.
Now is the time to think about how you can improve your own life. What hobbies can you pick back up and what new ones can you try? What friends could you spend more time with? What nice things could you do for your family or for those around you? How could you get more physically active or how could you freshen up your workout routine? Think about how you can concretely fill up your schedule with activities that will benefit your life in the long run.
Every time you feel the urge to reach out to your ex again, challenge yourself to do something beneficial for yourself again like going for a run or checking off an important task on your To Do List.
Stay busy and find purpose, and focus full heartedly of rebuilding your self confidence. The key to bouncing back from this breakup and getting your ex back is going to be self confidence, so now is the time to make it your top priority.
On top of that, the moment you stop reaching out and showing them how badly you want their presence in your life, they’ll notice. By this point, your ex has become so used to having you at their beck and call that the moment you disappear, you’ll grab their attention.
Human beings have a terribly tendency of taking things for granted when they’re always readily available to them and wanting what they can’t have. When you’re thinking, “My ex is ignoring me and it hurts,” bear in mind that you can turn it all around by focusing on personal development.
If you can do this, rest assured that your ex will start to miss you. They’ll get off their high horse and with time, they will be open to communication. It’s up to you to make sure that when that moment comes, you’ll be ready to make a powerful comeback.
For more in depth information on how to restore your self confidence or how to act after a breakup, I encourage you to click the links!
As always, we are here to help so please don’t hesitate to reach out. You can leave any questions you may have in the comments section below, or get in touch with me or a member of my team right here.
Wishing you all the best in life and love,
Your coach when you want to know the reasons your ex won’t talk to you
I Know We Are Meant To Be!
Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love... for good!