5 SIGNS THAT YOUR EX IS OVER YOU and what to do to fix it!

BEST SIGNS YOUR EX IS OVER YOUYou’re starting to get a sneaking feeling that the person you are still in love with is moving on with their life. It’s one of the worst feelings in the world. You’ve noticed things on their social media profiles, and your friends have been telling you that they’ve seen them out and about with people you don’t know… Now you’re wondering what it all means and if it’s too late to turn things around.

If you see signs your ex is over you does it mean that you can never get them back? Does it mean that you have to accept and move on with your life? Instead of allowing yourself to panic, keep reading because I’m about to set your mind at ease!

As a relationship expert specialized in helping people get back with their ex, I have developed a radar for knowing if individuals still have a chance to get back with their significant other.

We’ve coached over 15,000 individuals through private coaching sessions, helping them to evolve and inspire the person they love. Sometimes it entails rebuilding a person’s confidence, or providing them with proper communication tools. Other times it’s been giving someone perspective on what went wrong in their previous relationships.

But all in all I have the experience to tell you if your ex is still into you. In this article we will take a deeper look at how to know if your ex has begun to move on, and what you can do to turn things around!

It will require patience, motivation and self-control like we explain it in the numerous tools to help you get back with your significant other , but in love, nothing is impossible!

If my ex is over me does it mean that I can’t make them come back?

Before we dive in, I want to take a moment to let you know that even if you’ve started seeing signs that my ex is over me, it doesn’t mean that all hope is lost. Sometimes people really try to move forward with their lives in hopes of mending their broken heart as soon as possible, but it doesn’t mean that their love for you has disappeared.

In fact, the more obviously an ex tries to move on, the deeper their feelings are for you. Think about it, if they didn’t really care, they wouldn’t go out of their way to cut contact or try and date someone new as soon as humanly possible.

Let me give you an example; I was coaching a young lady from L.A called Rachel. She had been on and off with her ex-boyfriend for about 3 years and reached out to me after their third breakup.

Obviously she had been dumped for the third time and she really thought that hope was lost and that her boyfriend had moved on for good because he was liking pictures of other girls on Facebook; something that he hadn’t done in any of their previous separations.

She was quite vulnerable when she first reached out to me and afraid that no contact would give her ex-boyfriend time and space to develop a relationship with a new girlfriend.

You see your mind tends to play tricks on you when you are such a weak position and you tend to project the worst possible outcome as your inevitable future.

But Rachel was strong and determined and she was able to cut all contact and even not reach out to him on his birthday. Well the tables quickly turned and as she was getting better and regaining self-confidence and peace of mind, he started fearing that he had lost her for good.

The point is her ex-boyfriend went out of his way to cut all contact and to pretend that he had moved on and wanted nothing to do with her….but in fact he was only fooling himself and they are now back together and happy.

Of course each person is unique, but generally speaking, I can tell you that if you see the signs I’m about to list (especially if it’s really soon after the break up,) it’s very likely that you’ll have a positive answer to your question of does my ex still love me?

By keeping an eye out for the actions your ex has taken to try and move on, you’ll have a better idea of how to organize your plan for getting them back!

It’s normal to feel hurt and rejected, but just remember that the more effort an ex makes to move on, the more they are feeling. So, signs that your ex is over you can actually be signs that your ex still has feelings for you!.

Look for these signs that your ex is over you and then you’ll know what to do…

So now that you know that these signs aren’t as scary as you thought, let’s look at what actions mean that your ex is trying to move on. Once you have a clearer picture of what’s going on, we’ll look at how you can turn things around and make them want you back!

– No regret: Your ex does not say anything about missing you or regretting that things ended. When asked about how they’re feeling, they always say that they’re great and couldn’t be happier. Depending on the person, this could be genuine or a facade.

A remember that a break up entails a separation. The person breaking up often feels that they need to prove to the world and to you that they made the right decision to breakup. So they pretend or convince themselves that they are happier when in fact they’re not.

A few weeks after the breakup, people that seemed happy often become depressed realizing that the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence!

– They changed their number: This is one of the most obvious signs an ex is over you, or at least that’s what they want you to think. It depends on a lot of things from your relationship, the way things ended, and how you’ve acted since the breakup.

When an ex changes their number it’s usually because they are going to extreme measures to heal without bringing up painful memories.

From experience I know that this tends to happen when you are extremely clingy after a breakup. If you’ve chased your ex and blow up their phone, sometime they have no other choice but to simply cut you off for good!

– They’ve told you they feel nothing for you: If they go out of their way to tell you this, it’s a pretty good indicator that they’re trying to move on. There are plenty of ways to seduce someone again, and I’ve written an entire article on the subject that you can read here : how to seduce an ex!

No matter what, even if your ex says the meanest things to you (most of the time to force you to let go), this doesn’t mean that they truly feel this way about you; or that they will always have a negative image of you. Through your actions and what you can do it is possible to change the way an ex sees you.

I know this for a fact because I’ve helped countless people get back together after very messy breakups!

– Your ex stopped contacting you: This is a pretty normal thing to happen after a breakup. You might be wondering is my ex over me if it’s a sign that my ex boyfriend has moved on, but don’t panic. Perhaps they react negatively when you reach out or they are flat out ignoring you, but you can change the course of action.

Again, you are going through a breakup after all and you shouldn’t expect your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend to act the same way that they used too.

This gets a lot of people that I coach in trouble, or it throws them in a funk because they don’t recognize the person that they were with.

If this speaks to you, I highly recommend that you check out my video below.

– Your ex un-friends you on social media. In today’s day an age this is a big deal. It could be taken as one of the ways how to tell if your ex is over you, but it’s also no reason to panic. It’s normal for them to want to heal and not be reminded of painful memories each time you pop up on their feed.

Being blocked on social media can be quite painful to a lot of people. I’ve had so many questions on how to deal with this that I created a video seminar on how to get back with an ex when blocked on social media. If you find yourself blocked by your ex I highly recommend you to check it out!

– Your ex wants their things back: This is always painful, but it’s a good way for both of you to move forward! We are visual creatures and reminders of the person we lost are hard to have around during the healing process.

Remember that you shouldn’t be desperately looking to hold on to the past; instead look to create a new story, a new relationship with the one you love.

When you are in that mindset it becomes so much easier to let go of the past and to give your ex their things back without any drama.

– Your ex is rude: Some people act out when they’re hurt, and it could mean a variety of things. Your ex could resent you, or they could use an unpleasant attitude as a defense mechanism.is my ex boyfriend over me

What I’d like to say here is to remember to not devalue yourself throughout the process of trying to get back together.

Don’t let your ex disrespect you and stand up for yourself when needed…you’ll gain more of their respect that way and in turn increase your chances of getting back together in the long run!

– Your ex tells you that they see you more as a friend: This often happens after short term relationships. It doesn’t mean that all hope is lost however. You’ll have to focus on physical seduction…

In my experience the dreaded friend-zone is often overblown. It is a lot harder to be friends with an ex them most people realize. What tends to happen is that you either end up getting back together or fighting like cats and dogs…

So don’t be afraid to play the friend card to be around your ex more and to inspire them!

– Your ex partner is dating someone else: This one is trickier because it could be a rebound, or it could be something serious. In either case it shows that your ex is trying to move forward.

This is one of the most difficult situations to deal with post breakups because you often have to relive the separation or feelings of rejection a second time.

Again from my experience it’s extremely difficult to move from one moving train to the next without any risk, damage or injury.

So if you’re ex quickly jumped into another relationship after the breakup it’s probably just a rebound. If you find yourself in this situation check out the video below.

Keep an eye out for signs your ex still loves you!

Don’t forget that there are all kinds of signs that an ex is not over you to be on the look out for. If you notice any of the following, you’ll be closer to getting them back in your arms!

It’s hard to know what exactly is going through your ex’s mind after a breakup, but some of these indicators can help you get a better picture.

– Your ex is still in touch: You still get calls and texts from your ex and you’re wondering does my ex still like me?. If they’re calling you to see how you are, chances are you’re still very much on their mind. This is a very good sign if you’re hoping to attract them back!

Many times when an ex reaches out it simply shows that he or she is trying to keep their options open or that they genuinely miss you.

The trap that many fall into is that they overplay their hand or try to rekindle too quickly which makes the ex pull away once again in fear of having to breakup with you a second time.

So if your ex starts to reach out to you, play it cool and let them start to slowly chase you.

– You hear that your ex has been asking about you: Again, if they’re showing interest in you by asking your friends how you’re doing, chances are they’re not 100% over you.

I’d like to take this opportunity to warn you not to involve friends and family in the breakup recovery process. They are often too biased and sometimes even too personally invested and hurt to give you sound advice.

No matter what, if you hear that your ex is talking about you it’s a positive sign but don’t go running back to them…

– Your ex partner has been looking at your Facebook: They’ve liked some of your pictures or they’ve made references to things they’ve seen on your profile… If your ex is going out of their way to look at what you’ve been up to, it means they care!

It is absolutely a great sign and it often means that you’re actually doing positive things in your day to day. Most of the people that I coach who find themselves in this position have passed the stage of grief and fully focused on finding their mojo.

If you transform into the person that you used to be prior to your relationship, the overwhelming odds are that you will once again attract and seduce your ex…

It’s worked for you once before so why wouldn’t work for you again!

– They’re posting pictures of things that are reminiscent of you: Perhaps they’ve posted a picture of a place you used to go to together, or of them doing something you enjoy doing. Social media is a pretty amazing way to indirectly communicate with someone…

Yes, these subliminal messages are a way of checking where you stand without being too vulnerable. This is usually when an ex seeks attention and another proof that the tides have turned in your favor.

Rebound relationship: Another one of the signs your ex is over you can also be a sign that they’re not. If they’re dating someone new right away, it can mean that they’re trying to forget you and they’re actually having a hard time doing so, so they start going out with someone else.

This is mostly the case in painful breakups caused by distance or a lack of attention during the relationship. Don’t rush to win back your ex, be patient and truly address the deep rooted issues….

True love doesn’t fade away that quickly, and what tends to happen in such cases is that your ex will compare their new boyfriend or girlfriend’s shortcomings to some of your best qualities.

It’s in human nature to take what we have for granted and yearn for what we’ve lost!

You can make them come back even if you see signs that your ex is over you!

Now that you’ve got a better idea of what’s going on, let’s take a look at what you can do about it. I know your head is probably full of thoughts like, Did my ex love me?”, “Are they forgetting about me?” and “How do I get them back!?” but all you have to do is take it one step at a time.

I know you’ve probably heard about the importance of space after a breakup, and it’s hard to really stick to it because you’re afraid it’s going to make your ex get over you and move on for good…

I’m about to tell you about the most important things to do when you want an ex back, especially if you fear that you’re witnessing signs hes over you.

Is my ex really over me?

The single most important thing to do right after a breakup (if you want your ex back) is to understand the true reasons behind a breakup or what went wrong in your relationship.

Sometimes that entails doing a radio silence in order to get the time and space you need to get proper perspective.

If you haven’t heard of no contact, check out this in-depth article that explains what it is and how to use the no contact.

In the process you can make your ex fear losing you and realize what they are on the very of losing.

They may have taken you for granted, and they’re used to having you around… always at their beckoned call. If they suddenly realize that you have more important things going on in your life and that you’re focusing on yourself, they’re going to start missing you. Again it’s human nature… If you abruptly take something away from someone,

sigsn he loves methey will miss it and want it back!

That said, it is equally important to work on yourself during this time. You want to improve yourself physically and mentally.

Hit the gym and start feeling better and better in your skin, and focus on making your goals a reality. Dive into projects at work and pick up old hobbies. Remind your ex of the person they fell in love with and become an even better version of them.

Think about it; they’ll be reminded of what they found so attractive in you and they’ll realize that they don’t have access to you.

They’ll begin to want you more than ever, and then one day you’ll have the deeply satisfying feeling of seeing signs your ex still wants you.

By the way, don’t hesitate to post all kinds of pictures on Facebook and Instagram of how amazing your life is and how much you’re enjoying yourself (if you were already active on social media)!

If you’re no longer friends on Facebook, don’t worry word will travel through your mutual friends.! Even if you’re no longer friends on Facebook, word will travel through your mutual friends.

You’re starting to see signs your ex is not over you so it’s time to get back in touch!

The no contact rule I mentioned above may need to be employed for a longer period of time if your break up was messy. If you’re not sure if and how long you should remain out of touch with your ex, don’t hesitate to ask me in a comment below. Just give me a brief description of how long you were together and how and why you broke up.

When the time comes to get back in touch, there are a few things to keep in mind. You’ve started to notice signs your ex is still in love with you, and you want to reach out to them…

You instinctively want to tell them that you still feel so much for them and you want to be together again, but don’t do it!! You need to remain in control of the situation. When you get back in touch, it’s crucial that you make your ex feel that you’re not totally available.

The moment you pop up out of nowhere after having not been in contact and start pouring your heart out, multiple less-than-desirable things can happen.

– Your ex can feel overwhelmed and freak out. You don’t want to suffocate them or make them feel pressured to be together again, especially if the break up was painful. They will have a guard up during this time, so let things happen very organically.

– Your ex partner might not appreciate your behavior and think it’s strange that you’re going from zero contact to being way too present. Remember; do not blow up their phone once you’re back in touch.

– If you are too readily available, you can seem needy and the entire intrigue that you’ve built up over the no contact period will just fly out the window.

By the way, if you’re wondering how exactly to get back in touch after no contact read our best selling eBooks for all kinds of useful suggestions!

When you’re wondering how do you know if you ex still loves you, it’s typically when you realize that you can still get their attention.

The thing is that you have to be proactive about it. Both of you need some time and space, and you’re not going to get anywhere if you just allow yourself to get depressed and spend your days laying on the couch watching sad movies.

Grab life by the horns and when you get back in touch with your ex, show them how much you’ve improved!

In conversation, be careful not to boast, but don’t hide the fact that you’ve really been going out of your way to make your life the way you’ve always wanted it to be. It’s an impressive and very attractive quality.

How one on one coaching can make him change their mind and come back!

Don’t forget that we are here to help you if you need. Getting an ex back when you’re not sure if they’re moved on or not is a pretty big endeavor. It’s totally normal to feel a bit overwhelmed at the idea.

Reach out to me or book a private coaching session directly to get the one-on-one guidance that you need to bring you closer to your goal!

Sometimes an objective third person with experience, results and proven track record of success is the best thing to help you design the best plan of attack and reach your goal.

Reach out to me by leaving your comment below, or by booking a private coaching session and we can offer you one-on-one guidance to bring you closer to your goal!

I know how complicated it all feels right but don’t panic, remain in control of your emotions, and take it one day at a time!

You’ll attract your ex back in no time.

Sincerely,

Your relationship expert for knowing the signs your ex is over you,

Coach Adrian

Life Coach, Motivational Speaker & Relationship Expert

  • jen

    Hi Adrian,

    Thank you for sharing the post. My ex and I broke up couple months ago. We’ve dated for about 2 years, with lots of ups and downs. My ex boyfriend probably got tired of so much up and down, and he actually broke up with me once last year. At first, I begged him to come back. But after reading and implementing the strategies to get my ex back, surprisingly the guy who seemed to have completely lost feelings for me came back.

    Unfortunately, he seems to have lost his spark again and we officially broke up couple months ago. He does not talk to me or even drunk call me anymore. Nothing. He’s not ignoring me, because when I talk to him, he responds very kindly. After we broke up, I implemented the no contact rule and other strategies again, hoping that he will come back once more. But still no sign, rather he seems like he doesn’t really care. The confusing part is that, when I coincidentally meet him, he is flirty with me (and only me), and tries to have sex with me at the end of the night, which I reject. He looks at me with adoration (I don’t know if that’s because he had couple shots of whiskey), and he’s awfully nice to me. But next day, he doesn’t talk to me again. If I start the convo, he responds pretty quickly.

    After reading your post, I realized that I shouldn’t talk to my ex again until he shows signs that he is still interested in me. But what if he moves on and never shows interest again? Should I implement the no contact rule again? It’s frustrating because it doesn’t seem to work on him at this point.

    • Tttttt

      I’m in the opposite situation. I haven’t seen and I’m not going around looking for her. Because she doesn’t to any of the places I go to. She dumped me because of not feeling the same as she did before. I was smothering because I was going out to much. Then I noticed she was pushing me away days before and I thought she was down. She was crying a few days before saying people don’t bother with her anymore. She doesn’t go out, she has to do everything by herself. It kind of hurt me when she said that. I then probably done the wrong thing and smothered her and shown her alot of affection. I mean a lot. I knew I was doing it but because I felt bad I was blind to how bad it was. I was an emotionally strong person before. Just had a bad patch with a change in profession and money wasn’t as good. Things have changed and I’m have alot more to offer in terms of emotional strength I feel secure and I feel brilliant. Just I feel one thing is missing and that’s my ex. But that’s a natural thing as 3 months isn’t really a long time. I’m over our breakup and don’t want the old relationship back. I want to start a new relationship with the improved me. I’m being patient by keeping no contact. If it’s not meant to be ill be thankful to her for making me a stronger and improved man for the women. She is 34 and I’m 27 so we could be at wrong time in our lives. But I don’t think we are just had a rough patch and she suffers with anxiety so turned her back on the fight ahead. Plus she has 2 girls so they are her priority not her feeling or mine. Which I respect alot. Wish you luck

  • Igor Mijatov

    broke with my girlfriend 4-5weeks ago. It was a 14 months relationhip. Lets call her M. Actually M. broke up with me. We had some fights before but at one point we decided to forget all the the past and move on, better and smarter this time. We both work at the same place, so i see her every day. 2 days beefore M. broke up with me, my ex girlfriend came to me at my workplace, she brought me a book for my friend. I didnt want M. to think that I m dealing with my ex because that was one of our/my problem. She tought that I m in touch with my ex. Beside my ex girfriend, I had a problem that I couldnt get too emotional in our relationship and wasnt able to talk about problems in our relationship due to my bad childhood. Im a person who keeps everything inside of me. I was so in love with her and she was in love with me. I had a pressure that I need to be a perfect boyfriend due to her stories abot her ex. She used to say that he was such a gentleman but they didnt worked out so good. 2 weeks before she broke up with me M. wrote me an email about our relationship that we need to talk about our past and that we need to decide weather we go on or we split. M. wanted me so bad and i did her too, but both of us made some mistakes. When the time came for talk I froze and I couldnt talk. She thinks that I dont need kisses or hugs or any of any kind of phisical connection. She tould me that was the reasen she decided to split. And thats all wrong because Im desperate for emotions and phisical contact. I made mistake after we broke up, texting her a lot and all she said that she is decisive and she made up her mind. I m thinking that she might have new boyfriend but I m not quite sure about that.
    Ive started a NC rule about 3-4 week but as we work together it is really hard not to talk to her. Ive asked her about her family and about work. Yesterday she was sort of yelling at me at work because ive helped old women at the bank office. She also said in front of out couleauges that im not a team player (because i was emotionally away) and that i just want to “sell” everything to everyone. Ive aksed why she was acting like that she said to me that Ive been like that during most of our relationship and said to me that I am an ashole.
    Justo to be mentioned she was cheating on me durign our relationship, I found that out but was willing to forgive it. 8 months after that she left me. I wanted to send her a long letter explainig her everything and bouquet of roses, but I`ve canceled it.
    Can u please tell me what to do????
    I need to say that she has a new boyfriend for sure! They have been seen together! :((

    How long should the NC period last?

  • Igor Mijatov

    Hi Adrian,

    I broke up with my girlfriend 4-5weeks ago. It was a 14 months relationhip. Lets call her M. Actually M. broke up with me. We had some fights before but at one point we decided to forget all the the past and move on, better and smarter this time. We both work at the same place, so i see her every day. 2 days beefore M. broke up with me, my ex girlfriend came to me at my workplace, she brought me a book for my friend. I didnt want M. to think that I m dealing with my ex because that was one of our/my problem. She tought that I m in touch with my ex. Beside my ex girfriend, I had a problem that I couldnt get too emotional in our relationship and wasnt able to talk about problems in our relationship due to my bad childhood. Im a person who keeps everything inside of me. I was so in love with her and she was in love with me. I had a pressure that I need to be a perfect boyfriend due to her stories abot her ex. She used to say that he was such a gentleman but they didnt worked out so good. 2 weeks before she broke up with me M. wrote me an email about our relationship that we need to talk about our past and that we need to decide weather we go on or we split. M. wanted me so bad and i did her too, but both of us made some mistakes. When the time came for talk I froze and I couldnt talk. She thinks that I dont need kisses or hugs or any of any kind of phisical connection. She tould me that was the reasen she decided to split. And thats all wrong because Im desperate for emotions and phisical contact. I made mistake after we broke up, texting her a lot and all she said that she is decisive and she made up her mind. I m thinking that she might have new boyfriend but I m not quite sure about that.
    Ive started a NC rule about 3-4 week but as we work together it is really hard not to talk to her. Ive asked her about her family and about work. Yesterday she was sort of yelling at me at work because ive helped old women at the bank office. She also said in front of out couleauges that im not a team player (because i was emotionally away) and that i just want to “sell” everything to everyone. Ive aksed why she was acting like that she said to me that Ive been like that during most of our relationship and said to me that I am an ashole.
    Justo to be mentioned she was cheating on me durign our relationship, I found that out but was willing to forgive it. 8 months after that she left me. I wanted to send her a long letter explainig her everything and bouquet of roses, but I`ve canceled it.
    Can u please tell me what to do????
    I need to say that she has a new boyfriend for sure! They have been seen together! :((

    How long should the NC period last?

  • josh

    Hello Adrian, your journals have been very therapeutic for me in this difficult time. My girlfriend broke up with me 3 weeks ago. it was a casual break up and it wasn’t till a week later i realized the relationship was over. we have kept in communication and she’s told me that she is still in love with me but that she wants to think only for herself for the first time. We have been together for 5 years. we lived together for the last two years but I moved out because i wanted to be sure i was ready for marriage. this caused friction and there were times in the relationship I did not show her much affection n attention. Ever since the break up, she has gotten a new job in her little small town 2 hours away and is moving. I want to implement the “NO Contact” rule well she moves and settles into her new job n reconnects with her family and childhood friends. She still wants us to be in touch and she said she wants me to be happy. but I have to do me. she doesnt know for certain we will be back together depending on her experience when she moves back home. She might prefer the small-town guys and lifestyle. I have told her that i am ready to commit and we do have the same values and goals. How long should we not contact each other once she moves? what are the chances she will be happy at home but realize that she still wants to be with me?

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Josh,
      Thank you for sharing your story. Your situation really resonated with me, so I wanted to take a moment to reply. I work beside Coach Adrian. It seems to me like moving out forced your ex to go into a reflective stage, where perhaps she started questioning the future. I do encourage no contact, but would like to understand the parameters of the break-up more in order to determine length of time. I do invite you to book a session to speak with Adrian or I.
      I do wish you the very best either way.
      Sincerely,
      Natalie

  • Brett Koch

    Hey Adrian I recently broke up with my ex because she freaked out when she found out her ex boyfriend of nine years got married to another woman. I felt we were getting closer to getting engaged. I was hurt by her reaction and abruptly ended it because I didn’t want to share her heart. We have not had any contact until yesterday when she emailed me. She said she was crying a lot and was absolutely miserable. She towards the end of the email said she hopes that i have found someone who will love and respect me. She then said that she will always love me. What should I do? I haven’t emailed back because its confusing. I would appreciateany advice. Thank You!

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Brett,
      I’m Coach Natalie, it’s nice to meet you. Your story really resonated with me and so I wanted to reach out to you. I know you’re in a rough spot and were scared to share her heart. However, her pain about her ex getting engaged is likely less about her heart and more about her ego. Have you ever felt forced to compare yourself to another person? To thousands of people, this happens multiple times a day. However, it doesn’t mean she is unhappy in her relationship with you or still wants to get back with her ex.
      I hope this helps.
      Sincerely,
      Coach Natalie

  • Coach natalie

    Hi Gem,
    Thank you for your share. I know you’re wondering if your ex is over you and whether or not you can fix it. This process can be very painful, so I commend you for your strength. It seems to me that she may not have processed her previous breakup before you and her got together, and this is likely going to mean that the baggage between her and her ex is not infused into your relationship with her. I think that you should give her some space so that she can sort herself out. This does not have to be forever, so don’t lose hope. However, if you want a chance at a real relationship with her, she’ll need to be emotionally available for you. If you need help with this process, please feel free to book a session and we can discuss it further one-on-one.
    I hope this helps.
    Sincerely,
    Coach Natalie

    • GeM

      Would say this was rebound relationship? If so How often do these workout?

  • Ky

    I dated a guy for four months. I got nervous about where things were going. I was afraid of being hurt and subsequently broke it off. I realized I made a mistake and asked to reconsider working things out. Then I got a break up email. I ran into him at a party and he acted like he was upset with me and then got even more irate when he saw me talking to another guy at the bar. We talked breifly and I was confused by his behavior. After that, I considered the possibility that we weren’t finished. Long story short, he admitted he wasn’t over his ex and believes we can’t work out. I’d love it if he came back but I don’t think even your methods could work in this situation at all.

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Ky,
      Thank you for sharing your story. I know it can be really hard when it comes to figuring out if your ex is over you or not and if he’s not, how you’ll be able to fix it. In order to help, I’m going to need to know a bit more information. How long did he date his ex? Do you have a clear understanding as to why they broke up? Are they still in contact? Either way, I do encourage you to take this time to determine why you were afraid of next steps in the relationship. Regardless of outcome, use this opportunity to learn a lot about yourself. I think that if you put it into perspective, you likely learned a lot and this will prepare you for the future.
      Sincerely,
      Coach Natalie

  • Ira

    Hi Adrian,
    Thanks for all your help. Please take a look at my situation if you can…
    Me and my ex had a ‘legendary’ relationship of 2 years (I moved to another country for him, we lived together for a year) before he dumped me 1.5 year ago (fed up with my insecurities). Since we broke up I’ve been confident and improving myself, but the best I ever got from him was mixed signals (he admitted he had feelings for me even 10 months after the breakup…but at the same time he started dating someone else, trying to move on!!) We were in regular contact as ‘friends’ for about a year, but it progressively lessened as he became involved in a new career / social circle / new girlfriend (who he admitted that he “is not love with, but it’s better to have a partner”). I became friends with this girl, as well as his entire new social circle…so I can see them regularly should I choose to. I played it cool around them, so at first he was happy to stay friends with me, but lately I screwed up by displaying some emotions and over-contacting him…so he and his new girl saw through my facade. Now they avoid me completely – especially him. He doesn’t even answer when I email “happy birthday”. It seems that he’s trying really really hard to move on, and to keep his new girlfriend from being jealous. I know I need to disappear and let him chill, – obviously I have been ‘chasing’ too hard – but it’s impossible to COMPLETELY disappear. Our social circles are too damn close in this small city. What about his new girlfriend? I’ve been preaching friendship to her, so it’s kind of weird to disappear (not that she’d care). Should I cultivate a closer friendship with her and let her see I am ‘safely out of love with him’, or should I just try to disappear completely and bide my time? With him, it’s clear I need to back off…But what about this girl? She might be my rival, but can I actually use her to my advantage?? (god, I sound horrible, don;t I? ) 😀

  • Lincoln

    I dated a girl for a couple of months and everything was going great until one day she started acting strange. I asked her what’s wrong and she told me that she’s wanted space so she could finish out school and start looking for a job. She told me once she’s done we can start things back up and she really likes me and wanted to be with me. I didn’t like it but I wanted her to be happy and I didn’t want to slow her down so I agreed to give her space. A couple days went by and I wasn’t feeling like it was right so I messaged her asking her if we could work something out so I don’t have to wait so long to talk to her again but she wouldn’t go for it. A few day went by again and I messaged her friend asking if things we fine but she told my ex and my ex told me not to worry about her and told me she wanted to be with me but I shouldn’t wait so I got confused and I started freaking out and acted needy and clingy so she told me she doesn’t want it to work. Right away I went to no contact and a couple of weeks went by and she sent a picture of me when we were together and we talked for awhile just about the picture and the next day I sent her a messaged apologizing for the way I acted and stuff like that but never got a reply. I’m confused why she messaged me and i don’t know if she was deleting all of the pictures and sent me her favorite one or she starting to miss me

    • Lincoln

      She just messaged me telling me to move on.

      • Coach natalie

        Hi Lincoln,
        I’m really sorry to hear about your current situation. I know how painful it is when trying to decipher if your ex is over you or not and if they aren’t how to fix the relationship. I know it sounds hard to hear, but I encourage you to return to no-contact. I think that you need to reset this relationship and that can only be done by letting the current one end. It may sound impossible, but I know you can do it. If you need any help, please feel free to book a session with us. We can help you define and create a solid action plan to heighten your chances.
        Wishing you the best,
        Coach Natalie

  • Stephanie

    Hello Adrian, I am in a very torn place at this moment. I was with this girl for 5 years. On the 3rd year we started to fight a lot & have problems one after another, but at the end we would manage to find our way around it. Out of the blue when we made 5 years of this year in June, 5 days after she ends it with me saying that she doesn’t feel we can grow together & she couldn’t do this anymore. She didn’t talk to me for about almost 2 months & decided to come back on my 21st birthday. We ended up getting back together. We would fight like any other relationship, but at the end we would have so much fun together. Months after she went out of town to NY with her family when she came back she was telling me how she missed me & how much she loves me. She surprised me with a gift she got me out of town. Everything seemed fine until the next day she told me the same thing ” I don’t feel you & I can grow together & that she has no other solution but to let me go”. I was devastated. This happened two days ago & haven’t got no reach out from her nor will I reach out to her. I feel like when things got rocky I would always be the one to fight too keep her & she wouldn’t really try.. when she ended it with me she said “just because I’m doing this doesn’t mean I don’t love you”.

    What do you think on this & what should I do?

    Thank you.

  • Mal

    My ex and I broke up about a week ago and I let him go without fighting. We ended things on really good terms, almost too good. We haven’t talked about our breakup up or anything since we broke up. I’m trying to stick to the NC rule but it seems like he’s forgotten about me. He’s been going out every night partying and hanging out with friends. We were in love right before we broke up and I feel blindsided. I’m not sure if he even cares anymore. I still have his things but I don’t want to break no contact to give him them. He hasn’t asked for them back. I don’t know how to get him back because I don’t know how he feels

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Mal,
      Thank you for your share. I know how difficult this must be for you, and it’s natural that you’re looking for ways to know if your ex is over you and how you can fix it. If he’s going out and partying every night, it’s likely that he’s just distracting himself. He’s going through a break up, also, but he’s coping differently. To really know for sure, I encourage you to book a session so we can discuss the relationship at length.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • Pani

    My ex and I broke up a month ago. We are in college and Long distance. He said I was the best thing that ever happened to him. He stopped communicating his panic attacks over school one week and went cold. I got angry at him for a few days but then apologized and asked him if anything was wrong and if I could help. He said if I don’t give him space he will break up with me. I apologized and said I would. We would speak every two or so days for ten min. I hung in there for a week. I then tried to bring up his drug habits and asked him to reconsider drugs. He got mad saying I was treating him like shit. We barely spoke the following week, I just sent a bunch of supportive messages. He then acted really egotistic and sent me pictures of himself on our 4th month together. I had enough of the distance/space for two weeks so I broke down crying asking him why he was being so egotistical and mean and that it felt one sided for the last three weeks. He then said he had been meaning to tell me he was going to break up with me on the following wed he was just being nice till then, because he didn’t have time to date and then told me “we should block each other” so I blocked him and haven’t had any contact since we broke up. Please help

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Pani,
      Thank you for your share. I know you’re looking to see if your ex is over you and how you can fix your relationship, but I feel like your ex needs time to focus on himself. Similarly, so do you, and you need to realize how much value you add to his and your life. It seems like he’s got a lot going on and if he’s manifesting his stress via drugs, you’re setting yourself up for a long road of heartache. I encourage you take this time to yourself. Focus on you and become the best version of yourself you can be. After you’ve achieved this, decide if that’s the type of man you want in your life long-term.
      I hope this helps.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • Joe

    I met this girl in my class this semester that just ended (we met in September) . We hit it off really quick. The chemistry was so amazing and we both were connecting emotionally and physically. Something I never felt. She met my parents and she came over a few times and even slept over for a night. I met her best friends and went on double dates. She gave me gifts and shes the first one that told me she loved me. In overall everything was fantastic. But the last 2-3 weeks she’s been very cold and different. She told me last week she’s going to a different college out of state next fall and she’s packing her bags in May. I was upset and she could tell. She ask if we can still be friends,I was devastated. Next day I explain to her how I felt and we were very open throughout the whole convo. She’s says that she’s still finding herself and looking at her career goals. Now this is where it gets tricky and I really need your help here. This passing Tuesday was our final, we had a short convo before the test on the weekend.So she finishes early and takes off. I later leave and start heading the class where I usually walk her to cause I wanted to say goodbye before the last day ends. I text her to see if she’s at the class and she responded with “no I left for work” and I then pass the class and she was there and I caught her in the lie. I told her to come out, she instead texts me saying “don’t don’t this I’m sick and I don’t want to talk to anyone” she was sick for the last 2 weeks but she then texted me saying she was going to meet up with me next week after Christmas or call me. I’m so confused, everything was so good and it just flipped. Thank you

  • patrick

    So my ex and i broke up about three months ago. We dated for almost 2 years. She broke up with me after moving in with me after she left college and them broke up with me 4 months later because we were fighting and trying to figure out how to live together. After we broke up it has been so hot and cold its hard to know what is going on. One moment she misses me and regrets it the next it seems like its a burden just to talk to me. I am 24 and shes 22 and two weeks ago she moved back home which is about 3 hours away. Before she left and the week leading up to it she was all about talking to me and hanging out with me. She even went as far to tell me she regretted breaking up with me but had already made the plans to move and had to follow through with it. The last day she said she loved me and always would then left as we both balled our eyes out. Since she has left its been a struggle to even get her to talk to me. She is all over social media but will not reach out to me even though she said she would. I don’t know if i should give her some space to let her settle or she was just stringing me along in the first place. The last conversation we had was a little rough and got heated which it shouldn’t have but i have felt somewhat used. She did say after the fight that she was still thinking about me so i do feel she cares but i can not tell if she is letting me down slowly or genuinely does still care about me

    Thanks,
    A Trouble Soul

  • shalaine nichols

    my ex and i were together for 3 years and had a pretty messy break up that started off as a break and turned into an all out knock down drag out fight with words . i know i hurt him badly by some things i said . cheating was never a issue in our relationship just our temper and stubborness . how long should i give him to heal before contacting him?

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Shalaine,
      Thank you for your share. I know how challenging it is to try to find signs and ways to get back with your ex. Rather than focussing on his healing, I encourage you to focus on your own. Focus on what you can work on to make sure that you don’t have to resort to verbal slander. I think that if you do this, you’ll be setting the stage for a much stronger relationship with your ex. He won’t come back around until he’s seen those changes.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • theresa

    me ex and i were together for 15 months. one night he left because he had to go get his drunk friend and was gone for 2 days. in those 2 days he ignored me because he said he didn’t want to talk to anyone really and then he broke up with me randomly. he came over and got his stuff he held me and kissed me. he said he was doing it for himself. he said he wants to get a job and become more of himself by himself on his own. on the 25th of december he said he wanted space for a while. mind you we broke up the 10th of december and texted everyday after because i couldn’t leave him alone. but the 25th is when he said he wanted space so i have contacted him since then. i told him to text me whenever he was ready and he said he will. he blocked me on every social media. so…. idk.

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Theresa,
      Thank you for your share. It’s tough when trying to determine if an ex is over you and how you can go about fixing it – but at this stage, I really suggest you implement no contact and stick to working on you. It’s a new year, and it’s the perfect opportunity to optimize your self and how you view yourself. Your ex likely disappeared after the breakup (blocking, etc) because he felt you were behaving slightly needy. If you want to show your ex you’ve changed and are evolving, no contact will prove this, as it’s out of your character so far. I really think this could be a great start for you. If you need more help, I encourage you to book a session with Adrian or I. Together, we can develop a game plan.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • Ebony Whiteside

    Me and my ex boyfriend dated for 4 months, it was the best 4 months of my life, he called me the love of his life. But a few days ago I broke up with him because he cheated on me. I deleted him off of all my social medias, he doesn’t text me, call, or anything. I’m starting to think we’re really done.

    • Coach natalie

      Ebony,
      Thank you for your share. I’m so sorry to hear about your current situation – I know it can be really tough when trying to determine if your ex is over you and/or what you can do to fix it. Firstly, I want to say that, if your ex cheated on you, there’s a chance it’s going to be really challenging for you to trust him in the future. Are you prepared to let go of this incident? If you aren’t sure, then getting back with him may lead to a long road of lack of trust and anxiety for you in the relationship. I encourage you to focus on yourself right now – regain your self confidence, this will make a massive difference when it comes to getting back together.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • redshadlizard .

    My girlfriend of two years, that I’ve been off and on with for thirty, left me Christmas Eve after a text war. I hurt her feelings very much by calling her every name in the book. Told her she was ugly, stupid, etc….She is very sensitive and I was told not to contact her. I love her and was going to ask her to marry me. What do I do to win her back? Thanks.

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Redshadlizard,
      Thank you for your share. In order to get your ex back, you’ll have to find ways to correct the reflex of name calling. Your ex needs to see that you’ve changed as a person in order for her to feel comfortable engaging with you again. Try making a list of ways you can avoid the verbally abusive behavior. If you need help with this, please feel free to reach out to us directly and book a session. I think you’ll get a lot of use out of it.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • Anna

    My ex broke up with me after 4 1/2 years we have two children together. He broke up with me and stuck around for 5weeks and then moved into his new place with a new gf who he introduced to our children straight away.
    He told me that he hadn’t been in love with me For 6months but he stuck around for that long because he wanted to try, we bickered like couples do. He said that he was unhappy. Yet he still brought me gifts and things and they weren’t cheap! The thing is my ex is not the type to keep quiet if he has an issue he will tell you, so I’m confused aswell
    Since then I’ve tried nc and lc and one of us always texts. I’ve removed myself off social media I don’t want to see the flaunt of their relationship!
    When I call he always answers and he will always text me back, he won’t talk about us but he will always talk about the children!
    I still love him and I want to sort this.
    He tells me he will never get back together and sometimes he’s just so nasty. Or does something for a reaction.
    We’ve had ups and downs and our relationship has been tested and we’ve always stuck together,he has since lost people close to him and he hasnt bereaved
    I can’t stop crying!
    Our children are so lost and confused aswell!
    What do I do for the best!

  • NK

    Me and my ex was together for almost 6 years. There have been so many problems and stuff, but we were so happy, or i taught so. But last few months before he broke up, i was always complaning about him, theb he broke up but still wants to be friends and we was, but more like a couple again. And then i began to me the same old me, who always asked him to get together, and annoyed him. And i startet to always take up a fight with him. He told me not to talk about these stuff about getting together and i should prove him i will change and then he definetly will come back. But i didnt. I just want him to be mine. Now 5 months later he got enough and now he tell me he dont love me og feel anything for me og even dont see anything in the furture for me. And i ask what of i changed and he said, he could tell how he was gonna feel in the furture but right now he doesnt want me. But still he wants to have contact at ‘follow me grow’ as he said. And he also kisses me when we meet still. But, he talks with this other girl to. Burt he told me that there was nothing with her. I really messed up, and i really want him back! What should i do?

  • Gasper

    Well I do’t know where to start…I met this girl Z. last year in January, at that time i was still in a long term relationship (8 years) with another girl. The things were not looking good in this relationship, because she got bored and was already “dating” other people. In April we finally broke up. Till April we were just good friends with Z. or more than friends but without physical contacts.
    After my ex moved out, we slowly began our relationship. At that time she was more into me, than I was in her. Our relationship improved slowly, but after three months some things become bothering her. For example I still had some personal belongings like clothes from my ex in my apartment. I did not want to untag me from Facebook photos of my ex or remove her from my facebook friends.
    Z. became slowly inpatient, although we made some travels together to sea side, Berlin, Austria… there were more and more things that bothered her about me and started accusing…like I am too passive, don’t laugh enough, too serious ( I am 34, she 31), without energy, don’t show feelings. But she still wanted to be with me, she plead to be with her, but she wanted it on her own terms (removing all of the exes stuff, announce on the facebook in the relationship). I kinda started to avoid too much contact with her, because there was always something that bothered her. on December the 5th she wrote to me the long letter that its over, but she still had contact with me, we even planned skiing trip in this January together. On 22th of December she invited me to her house to watch the movie, but I already made some plans, 23th of December she posted me in the morning thru Viber even some kisses. But on that day she went out in the evening with friends (what she normally does not do). A few days later she told me, that she met someone new who is everything that she wants to be from a relationship and feel madly in love with him although he has got no material and financial background. For a new year they were already sleeping together, although this is a distance relationship and they see each other only on weekends.
    now, after 14 days, she claims, that she is still in love in him and that he represents everything that I am not and what she loves in the relationship. And that she certainly does have no desire to go back to me because we are to different…
    Only after she told me the news, that she met someone new my world felt apart and with the speed of this new relationship things went even worse.. I feel now terrible because of my principles and tolerance for the ex, which costed me a great relationship with this beautiful girl Z…..is it only a rebound? are there still some chances for us?

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Gasper,
      Thank you for your share. I know how hard it can be when we’re trying to decipher our ex’s intentions, whether or not they’re over you and how you can fix your relationship. Ultimately, don’t put too much importance on this new person. I can assure you that whoever she is with is completely irrelevant to you and her and your previous relationship. I encourage you to take this time to really find out what the issues were in your relationship and how you can rectify them. If you can do that, you’ll be in great shape to start rekindling with your ex. If you need help with this process, I invite you to book a session with Adrian or myself. We’re here to support you.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • Coach natalie

    Hi April,
    Thank you for your share. It’s very normal to intensely analyze our ex’s actions when we’re looking for signs that show whether or not your ex is over you and how to fix it. I encourage you to stop posting on social media and also to stop looking at it for a bit. I say this because it’s important that he feels your absence; it’s the only way he’ll realize the weight of his decision. He needs to miss you and then he can assess if he’s made a mistake in leaving you. I know it’s hard to stop talking to our ex’s, but it really makes all the difference. If you need any help, feel free to book a session with Adrian or myself. We’re here to assist.
    Sincerely,
    Coach N.

  • J

    I’m about to get way too personal in a comment box haha. Ok, let’s see… My ex-boyfriend and I have been friends for 10+ years and dated on and off for nearly 18 months. He had a crush on me starting in the 8th grade and I didn’t think of him as anything more than a friend until just before he left for a 2 year mission trip. We started dating about a year after he got home. In the beginning of us dating, I had commitment issues and he worked very hard to get us to date. Though I was technically only going on dates with him for the first few months, I didn’t term us “exclusively dating” until about 3 months following our first date. In fact, his persistence and confidence in how he felt about me allowed me to feel secure enough to commit to an exclusive relationship. Things moved quickly after that and just over 7 months of dating we were looking at engagement rings and tentatively planning our wedding. However, he became overwhelmed and nervous with the responsibilities that came with marriage and asked that we take things slower, all the while assuring me that he wanted to be with me forever. However, with my commitment issues, this “step back” really affected me. About this same time, I went through what many would call a “faith crisis” and questioned my fundamental belief in God. This also impacted our relationship severely and my ex was very concerned about “taking a risk” by dating someone who’s faith wavered. We began having issues for the next 7 months and both of us hurt each other deeply through our lack of commitment and through harsh things said. Near the end of our relationship he said, “If it’s this hard, maybe we’re just not meant to be.” He ended things “for good” a week after pressuring me to be exclusive with him. I reacted very poorly and said hurtful things and played the desperate ex-girlfriend. All of which was very out of my character. He told me he was not going to date me again, that we were both going to move on and marry different people. I took all of this very hard and know that I tried too hard to change his mind through frequent calls and texts. He blocked my number after a few days. I then signed out of all my social media because I recognize that I need to take time to focus on myself, but I still have moments of weakness where I miss him and try to reach out. I want to marry this man, and it is incredibly painful and unreal to me to believe its really over. I believe we can fix our issues, he does not. I feel like I just let “the one” go and ruined my chances of mending things with how I reacted in the first couple weeks following the breakup. He also lives in another city and I’m not really sure how to rekindle what we once had. Any advice?

  • Shane Theloner

    My x gf broke.up with me almost a month ago we still went out on dates after but she keep pushing me away anytime I try to ask her back n stop contacting her 4 days ago following a no contact rule it’s hard but I have faith something mite happen good she told me she hate me n never she n I ever again we fall out because of a big argument insults n nasty words she said she lost trust in me n she can’t see herself loving me again how long should I keep the no contact rule up for ? She n I was together for like 6 months I miss her bad

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Shane,
      Thank you for your share. I think 30 days is a good starting point with no contact. Without knowing more about your situation, I can’t assess too much further, but NC will really help your ex miss you and realize the positive things you brought to the relationship.
      I really hope this helps.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

      • Shane Theloner

        Thank you I’ll take it into consideration n follow the steps ughh it’s so long n today she contacted me n talk about things n she was crying over the phone but she said she still don’t want me back but yet she called n was talking about things n even said she likes another guy but her mind is still on me n hw I broke her trust in guys I told her don’t cry n talk nice to her but also wasn’t begn or being clingy when she said she had to go she said bye n I said bye to what does this means that my ex gf called is it bad for me answering my phone ?

  • Lizzy

    my ex broke up with me last november. we’ve been together 6 months. he’s dated girls before me but he confessed i was his first serious relationship. we fought every week but it’s mostly due to his anger issues. he broke up with me several times out of anger, but he would always want to reconcile the following day. it seems final this time since we had the “closure talk” in december and now it’s almost a month of no contact. in the talk he mentioned that he wont exist to me anymore, he wants me out of his life and he made it sound like he’s going to ignore me forever. i dont know if i should believe him since he’s said a lot of things like this in the past that he didnt mean. he also blocked me everywhere on social media.
    he broke up with me because he’s always been jealous of my guy friend (who i’m not even THAT close to). he gets mad when i merely mention the guy’s name. i have no feelings for him whatsoever, but my ex still demanded i stop talking to him completely. i didnt want to give in because i didnt want to lose a friend. i guess my ex got fed up with him that’s why he broke up with me, but he never really had a reason to be jealous because im madly in love with him. we all go to the same school. if i want my ex back, should i ignore my other guy friend?

  • P

    Hey I love your steps of getting your ex back but I need your help and what should I do ? So me and my girlfriend have been dating for 2 years now, and she just broke up with me, she said that she don’t want to be with me because I hurt multiple times in our relationship (I never cheated on her with another girl physically) but I have been caught txting other girls I should have and I have lied about it but I never did it again.. so after that we head to West Virginia together for college and when we got here stuff got worse … we agrued more and we got into a fight once .. and Situation went down when a girl txt me a pic .. that I did not ask for and before my girl ask me who was I txting and I said it was my cousin … and I lied to my girl because I did not want her to freak about me txting a girl she never heard me talk about … so she was mad at me for lying to her about the girl and she told me not hit her up no more .. but we started arguing and I was mad at my girlfriend so I FaceTime the girl and called her. So when me and my girl was not mad no more she check my phone and seen that I have been in contact with the girl so she got mad again… we have been arguing and stuff and she broke up with me and said she can’t deal with me no more . I love this girl so much I could not take it that she was breaking up with me cause I felt like she would move on without me .. and she the one for me. But we got back together cause I made this statement to her “you made me come all the way out here for nothing and now I’m by myself” and two day went by and I went to her room and we laid down and I ask her can she be with me now .. and she said yes but I started to know that thingsbwas changing with her like her txting was dry and not fun and she takes forever to txt back and when I get around her I can feel her vibe like she don’t want me around and etc . So yeah she broke up with me cause all that happen … so I accept the fact she broke up with me and I txt her this after she broke up with me ” I want you to know it was not my intentions to make you feel forced into a decision about the relationship but I realized some of my action probably made you feel that way, but i respect your decision and I want to let you know im willing to talk about anything or listen just hit me up ” and she text back this “Okay thank you. & it’s not like I don’t want to be cool or friends.. it’d be stupid to act like I just wasn’t with you for two years.” What do I do now ? Cause I have her in one of my classes and I trying the no contact rule .. but if she says hi to me do I ignore or do I say hi and just walk away ? And what should I do to get her back ? And we have class together so what should I do ? I want her to chase me down to and she post stuff off her on her snapchat story of her at party’s with her girl and guy friends …

  • Blue rain

    I’m in a situation where “you’ll never know how important someone is until you lose him” kinda. We r in our late 40s both divorced and going on to our 6th year of relationship. I took him for granted and we had another big fight recently. This was when he hit the wall. He said he lost it for me not exactly sure how long but he didn’t tell me coz he wanted to work it out. I didn’t see it coming. I was the one who messed up (np cheating). Now I’m asking for one last chance. He gave me a slim chance. I call it skin cause he said now he’s open to opportunities if ever he finds one of meeting a new person. We still date, he keeps holding my hand and still tells me I’m still included in his retirement savings. No sex or passionate kisses but he still gives me lingering kisses. He told me to make it hard for him to give me up…now I’m rolling up my sleeves to win him back because I was careless all these years. Do you think I can win him back on my own and his options are open? He claims to be angry at this time. He doesn’t call or text me back but he would always pick up the phone when I call. He said he cannot see me or imagine me with someone new coz he knows he wouldn’t like it. What are my chances of winning him back. He said he will try to work on himself too but I need to work it out for both of us coz I hurt him too much.

    • Coach natalie

      Hi Blue Rain,
      Thank you for your share. I know it can be hard trying to win back our ex’s. However, it’s definitely possible with the right strategy. You need to showcase your evolution to your ex, and this will help him see that you’ve able to make him happy long term. Without knowing the unique characteristics of your situation, it’s difficult for me to give you more specific tips or direction. If you’d like to make a strong game plan, I encourage you to consider booking a session with me or with Adrian. We’re here to help.
      Sincerely,
      Coach N.

  • Crystal

    Hey well I just wanted some advice on what to do. My ex is literally my best friend and he’s been my best friend before we started going out. (M-18) (F-17) We’ve been best friends for over 4 years now but only recently started going out in November. We did actually try dating once before this time last year but that didn’t work out either cause it was just weird and the transition. This time though our feelings were more mutual. We actually had a “thing” going one for about 4 months between us which I think helped. We didn’t last long though because of how distant he started getting once we started going out and said things were different now and kinda saw me as a new person and couldn’t be himself around me like he used to. It’s been about a good month since we broke up but we obviously still talk since we’re best friends. We obviously gave each other some space once we broke up but eventually we started talking again. I feel as if he’s starting to move on but I’m not that sure. I know I haven’t gotten over him and still want him more then ever and care for him. What can I do?

  • AC

    so my girlfriend broke up with me last week, i already know im the one to blame because of the way i acted, i can be horrible sometimes during arguments i called her some nasty names, but she gave it back just not as bad as i did, we argued for about 3/4 months, we was together for a year, before the arguments the relationship was amazing, we didnt fight, we didnt argue, we just had fun, laughed with each other, saw are friends, then it just all went down hill, because we got too comfortable with each other and stopped seeing our friends, we spent about 5 months straight with each other, not doing anything, just sitting in the house never going out. not talking to out friends, and this became a normal thing, we were both miserable and thats how the arguments started, we didnt have anything to talk about because we didnt do anything, we had the same conversations over and over again, i could tell we was both getting sick and tired of each other, but we just didnt do anything bout it, because even tho it wasnt healthy and good for us both we just didnt want to be apart, the arguments got worse and the name calling got worse, we even argued infront of her parents, and thats something i would never do, just out of respect, i didnt like arguing anyway but it happened, i dont know why i said the thing i said and i dont even know why most of the arguments started…they just did… but i also wasnt aloud to see my friends, i had to delete every female from facebook, snapchat and instagram, but i didnt mind, i just said to her, ” as long as you do the same” we wasnt too bothered about that, but i did start some arguments too, nothing major, i played this game called mobile strike on my phone and i payed a lot more attention to it than i did to her and spent soo much money on it maybe £800 or more, thats a lot for a mobile game, but she hated it, because i didnt speak to her for hours and hours and i stopped touching her like i used to and i stopped appreciating her body, we stopped getting intimate with each other because she didnt feel good enough, and she was miserable and upset, because of the game and the arguments, but she knows i love her, even tho we are broken up we still speak, and yes i did turn into that guy- i begged cried and spammed her phone like crazy i did it for about 4 days, and im guessing i ahve ruined my chances of getting her back? ive told her that i realize the mistakes that ive made, and i wouldnt do it again, and im really been honest, i didnt realize what i was doing at the time, but no shes gone i have, and i want her back, she says she still loves me but she really hates me atm, and now we are gunna cut contact all together, we have ended on it good terms, i said im sorry for been silly and immature about the break , i told her that i might surprise her on valentines day…she didnt say no , she just laughed ad said okay, but she said her feelings for me have gone and she hates me, but she still loves me, and she still tellls me to unfollow girls or delete them, what are my chances with her and what should i do now?.. i hope all this makes sense btw i dont look when i type haha

  • Chris

    I need some advice.
    My ex an I dated for a year and a half, and is my best friend.weve Gone through some rough patches but the happiest times of my life as well. He’s the one person that always gets me and actually cared about me. We have been broken up for almost a year now. There was nothing wrong with us he said, He decided he needed to move and experience things on his own. At first when he first moved we talked often he would still stay at my place the weekend he came back. We still text everyday but he wants to be just friends to be able to do what ever he wants. He keeps saying we need to move on. But the second were together everything is alright and he acts like we’re together. It’s really playing with my heart he knows I love him and want him back. I’ve asked him for a conversation. He just hates talking about it and says he doesn’t wanna talk about it right now. What should I do? I love him & hes constantly pushing me to become a better person. But how do I actually get him to open up again. How do I get us back ?

  • Rip-Jayn Devon

    I need help me and my ex girlfriend have been in a lovely relationship everything was going that it was a commites relationship that we promised each never to leave one another ,we dated for six months but out of nowhere she asked me a question….what will you do if find me cheating n l replied l will be heartbroken later on that week she told me that she was breaking up with me l thought it was a joke but she was serious n soon she told she has found a new guy ,l tried to reason with her but it was no use all she had to say is she still did loved me but me and her could not date anymore l left her and havent heard from her in weeks and l miss her so much but l need advice on getting her back

  • Carina

    I dated someone for a little over three months and we were each other’s first relationship.We got along well and did a lot together, he even was the first to say I love you, but the only problem way it was hard to carry a conversation with him so it was a lot of small talk. I thought things were going good until one day he said we were too different from each other and broke up with me because he said he lost his feelings for me but still wants to be close friends. I’m not over him and I really want to be with him again but I don’t know if he’ll ever like me that way again

  • Carina

    And it’s been about a week so I would really love some advice on getting him back or even if it’s a good idea to thank you